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its-about-time

its-about-time

nope
Mar 19, 2022
807
I got my lovely 12 gauge too. Think about using hollow point bullets atm. Which bullet would you choose?
I have 00 buckshot currently. I like the idea of buckshot because it makes me less afraid of fucking up. I didn't know there were hollow point shotgun shells, are they slugs?
 
its-about-time

its-about-time

nope
Mar 19, 2022
807
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TimetoGo!

TimetoGo!

Wizard
Aug 30, 2022
641
I'll have the honor of being somewhat a rarity, a chick who ctb'd by shotgun
its the best way to go in my opinion. Quick and easy.

I am in the Uk and no way i'll get a gun here.
 
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czx85

czx85

Student
Jun 8, 2019
133
I have 00 buckshot currently. I like the idea of buckshot because it makes me less afraid of fucking up. I didn't know there were hollow point shotgun shells, are they slugs?
Hollow point bullets are slugs, but they expand on impact. I'm thinking hollow point bullets could be more lethal. Even if the angle of aim is not that accurate, the expansion would still, very likely, to destory the brain. But yea, I think 00 buckshot is a solid choice, as they are stronger, especially when it comes ro close range shooting (such as ctb...)
 
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its-about-time

its-about-time

nope
Mar 19, 2022
807
Hollow point bullets are slugs, but they expand on impact. I'm thinking hollow point bullets could be more lethal. Even if the angle of aim is not that accurate, the expansion would still, very likely, to destory the brain. But yea, I think 00 buckshot is a solid choice, as they are stronger, especially when it comes ro close range shooting (such as ctb...)
It wouldn't destroy everything behind you which would be good if you're doing it where other people are nearby, like in an apartment. At least that's what I've read about hollow points, then don't have much of an exit. I'll have to be outside probably for mine. I'd like to sit in my truck but then my family wouldn't be able to sell it, I don't have much to leave behind but it's something.
its the best way to go in my opinion. Quick and easy.

I am in the Uk and no way i'll get a gun here.
So I've heard. Lots of train deaths there, huh?
 
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its-about-time

its-about-time

nope
Mar 19, 2022
807
Anger is still a feeling.
Definitely. Maybe exasperated is more accurate. Annoyed that I can't bring myself to do it yet. Deep almost physical sensation of how nothing matters, and it goes both ways… why stay alive, but also why kill myself? If I die it's done and I won't have to decide anymore. But that requires deciding to die. What a clusterfuck.
 
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W

Willto

Student
Oct 26, 2022
112
Definitely. Maybe exasperated is more accurate. Annoyed that I can't bring myself to do it yet. Deep almost physical sensation of how nothing matters, and it goes both ways… why stay alive, but also why kill myself? If I die it's done and I won't have to decide anymore. But that requires deciding to die. What a clusterfuck.
I definitely know the feeling. Beeing on the edge. What is a human life really?
 
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its-about-time

its-about-time

nope
Mar 19, 2022
807
I definitely know the feeling. Beeing on the edge. What is a human life really?
I don't feel particularly human to begin with. I don't seem to have the capacity to connect or communicate well. Trying brings massive shitstorms and arguments. I can give love easily but rarely feel it in return… people love me, but I can't seem to feel that emotionally. It's torture. For so long. I'm separated from the world by an invisible one-way mirror or something. It's gotten to a point where anything meaningful just feels disgusting and pointless, like I don't even want it anymore.
 
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L

Ligottian

Enlightened
Dec 19, 2021
1,014
I got my lovely 12 gauge too. Think about using hollow point bullets atm. Which bullet would you choose?
I've got a lovely 12 gauge loaded with .00 buck. I'm still going with my lovely .357 revolver loaded with Hornady Critical Defense hollow points.
 
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W

well2hell

Student
Nov 6, 2022
102
I apologize for veering off topic, but I cannot wrap my head around the fact that no matter how many people may kill themselves with a gun (and/or kill others), the legislation on firearms in the US will never budge because of it, while pentobarbital remains more than forbidden. It makes so little sense to me.

And acquiring a shotgun and bullets is probably cheaper than pentobarbital.
 
its-about-time

its-about-time

nope
Mar 19, 2022
807
I apologize for veering off topic, but I cannot wrap my head around the fact that no matter how many people may kill themselves with a gun (and/or kill others), the legislation on firearms in the US will never budge because of it, while pentobarbital remains more than forbidden. It makes so little sense to me.

And acquiring a shotgun and bullets is probably cheaper than pentobarbital.
It is kind of wild. I think about that. The anti suicide legislative agenda is just a way for politicians to have easy wins. When it comes down to it, they don't care— it's only affected families and friends who care and advocate for anti-suicide laws. But guns in this country have way too much history and support to ever be denied. I've been involuntarily held in mental health wards and still had no issue purchasing a shotgun. Those are the laws I suspect will be changed in the near future. They rally to ban less reliable suicide methods, but little is done when it comes to firearms. The biggest issues currently facing firearm laws are regarding mass shooters, not non-violent suicidal folk.
 
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L

Little T

No Option
Aug 24, 2022
81
It is kind of wild. I think about that. The anti suicide legislative agenda is just a way for politicians to have easy wins. When it comes down to it, they don't care— it's only affected families and friends who care and advocate for anti-suicide laws. But guns in this country have way too much history and support to ever be denied. I've been involuntarily held in mental health wards and still had no issue purchasing a shotgun. Those are the laws I suspect will be changed in the near future. They rally to ban less reliable suicide methods, but little is done when it comes to firearms. The biggest issues currently facing firearm laws are regarding mass shooters, not non-violent suicidal folk.
Yet death by gun in usa will be counted as "gun violence". Not weariness of life.
Guns in usa are to confront tyranny!
 
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G

GetMeOut

👍Team Night-Night👍
Jun 9, 2022
53
Just picked up buckshot. ...
All you're going to be missing out on (if those are the right words) is us lot still posting about how utterly miserable and irretrievably fucked our lives are and how we wish we were dead. And, as the late Siegmund Warburg put it, "We should not deceive ourselves into thinking that when we die we shall be remembered intensively for more than a limited number of days — except by a very few people to whom we are bound by the closest ties of friendship and emotional attachment."

Time for my next can of beer. Maybe my liver will do the job for me in the end.

I've got a lovely 12 gauge loaded with .00 buck. I'm still going with my lovely .357 revolver loaded with Hornady Critical Defense hollow points.
I don't know why, but this did make me chuckle!
 
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its-about-time

its-about-time

nope
Mar 19, 2022
807
All you're going to be missing out on (if those are the right words) is us lot still posting about how utterly miserable and irretrievably fucked our lives are and how we wish we were dead. And, as the late Siegmund Warburg put it, "We should not deceive ourselves into thinking that when we die we shall be remembered intensively for more than a limited number of days — except by a very few people to whom we are bound by the closest ties of friendship and emotional attachment."

Time for my next can of beer. Maybe my liver will do the job for me in the end.


I don't know why, but this did make me chuckle!
I've got one who will remember me so intensely. What a beautiful string of words Siegmund wrote. Thank you for sharing. Cheers on that beer, I'm chainsmoking and drinking right along side you.
 
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G

GetMeOut

👍Team Night-Night👍
Jun 9, 2022
53
Cheers on that beer, I'm chainsmoking and drinking right along side you.
Thanks for that. It made me feel less alone. You see how isolated I am: even imagining a stranger on the internet drinking at the same time as me is a comfort.
 
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its-about-time

its-about-time

nope
Mar 19, 2022
807
Thanks for that. It made me feel less alone. You see how isolated I am: even imagining a stranger on the internet drinking at the same time as me is a comfort.
Here's for you, buddy. In this moment, we're in it together. Just a couple of depressive sods drinking and hanging on a suicide forum.
 

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GetMeOut

👍Team Night-Night👍
Jun 9, 2022
53
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S

Sourdough

I seek peace above all else. I hope to find it
Sep 3, 2022
82
Are you guys in the Midwest?
 
G

GetMeOut

👍Team Night-Night👍
Jun 9, 2022
53
Are you guys in the Midwest?
I'm from England. I work nights, but tonight was a night off, so I just drank all night like usual. I have nothing else to do on nights off. Nothing to do and no one to do it with. I'll go to sleep.soon.
 
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its-about-time

its-about-time

nope
Mar 19, 2022
807
Are you guys in the Midwest?
I'm Pacific Northwest
I'm from England. I work nights, but tonight was a night off, so I just drank all night like usual. I have nothing else to do on nights off. Nothing to do and no one to do it with. I'll go to sleep.soon.
Sleep soundly 💜
 
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Huntfish34

Huntfish34

Enlightened
Mar 13, 2020
1,619
Hey, sorry it takes me so long to respond. I was in the deer blind yesterday but still couldn't pull the damn trigger. Hope you are okay.
 
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its-about-time

its-about-time

nope
Mar 19, 2022
807
Hey, sorry it takes me so long to respond. I was in the deer blind yesterday but still couldn't pull the damn trigger. Hope you are okay.
I am okay despite a terrible string of self sabotaging actions this week since I posted this thread. I think I'm just not feeling anything at all. So it feels okay. But it's not. I'm giving myself a couple days break from trying to decide to live or die… I wasn't getting any closer to actually pulling the trigger anyways. Do you have anything to do today?
 
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Huntfish34

Huntfish34

Enlightened
Mar 13, 2020
1,619
Damn, glad you are okay despite the terrible string. I understand if you don't want to say but what actions did you take ?

I understand that Big time , don't feel much myself these days. Kind of reached a.... complacency with life which is alright but Still very scary to me. I just don't care for much of anything.

Not much, thankfully I just got off from my dumbass job and the idiot dickheads who run it. Now I'm off to the liquor store ... and then who Knows. Flying blind I suppose.
 
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its-about-time

its-about-time

nope
Mar 19, 2022
807
Damn, glad you are okay despite the terrible string. I understand if you don't want to say but what actions did you take ?

I understand that Big time , don't feel much myself these days. Kind of reached a.... complacency with life which is alright but Still very scary to me. I just don't care for much of anything.

Not much, thankfully I just got off from my dumbass job and the idiot dickheads who run it. Now I'm off to the liquor store ... and then who Knows. Flying blind I suppose.
It's a lot and I think I'm better off with the processing I've been doing over it and not sharing much right now. It showed me how little I'm trying to make things better though, I just accept things are awful and this week intentionally made things worse. I'm feeling reflective and more motivated to try to be better and to work harder because I have been acting pathetically. It's easy to be pathetic. I want to be better than that and have to try. So I guess this terrible week has ended in a positive way somehow.
 
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