Venting Silly thoughts

[Insomniac Butterfly]

I do not know what to do at this point.
I don't care to meet people. I don't care to learn anything new. I'm not growing. I'm not making any effort to communicate or coexist. I'm not going to go back to school or work.

Being out of this life is all I do want, but my only option is likely to shoot myself.
I don't even know if I could do such a thing. The more I look into it the more convoluted it all seems. what caliber is really enough? what angle is best? How long is it felt? Will hesitation or twitching cause me to fuck up and go through the worst pain i will ever feel until i bleed out? some accounts make a gunshot to the head seem fast and easy without effort, and others make it seem long, excruciating, and a hard way to die. i guess i just have doubts on the reality of what it's going to be like.

i probably need to buy new rounds, these ones haven't ever been fired, and have been sitting around for a couple decades.
that's easier to work on for now over thinking about doing the deed.

These questions are mostly rhetorical. I needed another human to read the pointless stuff in my head.

I guess a question I do have for anyone, how lethal is a .45 colt? Is it even worth attempting with this gun and caliber?

 

[SomewhatLoved]

If you're decided on suicide...

Firearms are GENERALLY the fastest and some of the least painful. Of course, there is always some level of risk and potential for failure but the statistics don't lie - suicide by firearms have some of the highest success rates. The ones I've seen pretty much always put firearms (specifically, shotguns) at the top for success rates.

Shotgun is best. In the mouth, not under the chin or at the temple/side of the head. Point backwards but slightly up, you are aiming for the brainstem. Turn that to red mist and not even a team of the world's greatest physicians and surgeons could save you.

I would advise you try to get a shotgun. That will give you the closest you can get to a guarantee of success. If you are to try with a pistol, I would advise you do more research on it. Try to search for some threads discussing different calibers and suicide with pistols.

 

[Insomniac Butterfly]

If you're decided on suicide...

Firearms are GENERALLY the fastest and some of the least painful. Of course, there is always some level of risk and potential for failure but the statistics don't lie - suicide by firearms have some of the highest success rates. The ones I've seen pretty much always put firearms (specifically, shotguns) at the top for success rates.

Shotgun is best. In the mouth, not under the chin or at the temple/side of the head. Point backwards but slightly up, you are aiming for the brainstem. Turn that to red mist and not even a team of the world's greatest physicians and surgeons could save you.

I would advise you try to get a shotgun. That will give you the closest you can get to a guarantee of success. If you are to try with a pistol, I would advise you do more research on it. Try to search for some threads discussing different calibers and suicide with pistols.

Maybe I am overthinking it all.
my family owns a shotgun, but it is rusty and old at this point, so I'd at least not trust it to fire properly without some maintenance.
I wish I could press a button and blink out of existence. That would be much easier
I'll see if I can make the pistol work out after some more researching.

Bless you. I appreciate you reaching out.

 

[SomewhatLoved]

I wish I could press a button and blink out of existence. That would be much easier

I feel this. Even if a method isn't "painful" per se, or if it's instantaneous like with guns, it can still be difficult to actively pull that trigger. You have to overcome pretty much every instinct you have that compels you to keep living, even if you don't want to. I think if something like pentobarbital was more widely available, a lot more people who be able to free themselves from this Earth. But here we are!

I wish you best of luck and eventual happiness, whether that means life or death.