rabbit_feet
heartbroken and drifting
- Apr 1, 2023
- 28
To be completely fair, I don't think it ever actually went away. Thought I was doing a little better for a while and the SI thoughts got quiet but I'm in the trenches of my mind again and the SI is back as strong as ever.
I feel like a total fuck up. I've been in therapy for 5? 6 years? And I'm still so pathetic. It's been so ingrained in me growing up that I am not good enough by myself. I need someone else to give me validation and love to feel like I'm worthy of life. But my parents don't give a fuck, my friends don't really check up on me like that, and my gf broke up with me months ago and now I'm alone. I don't have anyone to fall back on, no one to get invested in the projects I work on, no one to tell me what I'm doing had any meaning.
I feel so pathetic. All therapy has done for me is make me more self-aware. Now I recognize easier how much of a pathetic pos I am. I will never be good enough on my own.
I feel like a total fuck up. I've been in therapy for 5? 6 years? And I'm still so pathetic. It's been so ingrained in me growing up that I am not good enough by myself. I need someone else to give me validation and love to feel like I'm worthy of life. But my parents don't give a fuck, my friends don't really check up on me like that, and my gf broke up with me months ago and now I'm alone. I don't have anyone to fall back on, no one to get invested in the projects I work on, no one to tell me what I'm doing had any meaning.
I feel so pathetic. All therapy has done for me is make me more self-aware. Now I recognize easier how much of a pathetic pos I am. I will never be good enough on my own.
