BodyOfDaffodil
Member
- Jun 14, 2023
- 31
Hello, it's me, Daffodil. I haven't been posting a lot in recent months due to the fact that I've been changing living situations, and the fact I've been smoking w@@d so much that I cannot function without out.
I had a shrink visit last month, and despite my best attempts; I let the flood gates open and I broke down into tears about what was going on in my life and with my living situation. She suggested I distance myself from what she called 'traumatopia' and try to find a new area to live in. Mind you I'm from rural Saskatchewan, therefore meaning that travelling is extremely difficult. Much less moving to a new area.
I had debated the plans initially in hopes for my situation to get better and to improve with given time. However I very quickly realized bag it wasn't going to change and if I stayed in that situation it wouldn't be very beneficial to me; especially when my life was being threatened. I took a risk and moved to a larger city and started a new despite my limited money and what little I had. My new situation turned into a codependent relationship that's mentally draining, and toxic because of an abusive bf that's currently residing in the home. He's only gotten violent a few times, and usually takes his anger out on household objects. He's an active drunk, thankfully not a junkie.
I have an appointment with my shrink, and I want to tell her what's been going on regarding my housing situation, but I worry she's going to ask questions about my current living situation and I don't know if I should lie or not. As this person, is incredibly important to me and they have given me two amazing nephews whose safety I value above all. If I tell the truth, there is a chance I'll be encouraged to leave said situation and abandon said person in that situation. Yet if I lie, then I have to endure. I'm good at enduring, extremely good at it might I brag.
Okay, long story short. I want advice on if I should tell the truth or lie. I don't mind being homeless and have been since the age of 15, but I also kinda want to have a warm bed to sleep in instead of an anti-homeless bench.
I had a shrink visit last month, and despite my best attempts; I let the flood gates open and I broke down into tears about what was going on in my life and with my living situation. She suggested I distance myself from what she called 'traumatopia' and try to find a new area to live in. Mind you I'm from rural Saskatchewan, therefore meaning that travelling is extremely difficult. Much less moving to a new area.
I had debated the plans initially in hopes for my situation to get better and to improve with given time. However I very quickly realized bag it wasn't going to change and if I stayed in that situation it wouldn't be very beneficial to me; especially when my life was being threatened. I took a risk and moved to a larger city and started a new despite my limited money and what little I had. My new situation turned into a codependent relationship that's mentally draining, and toxic because of an abusive bf that's currently residing in the home. He's only gotten violent a few times, and usually takes his anger out on household objects. He's an active drunk, thankfully not a junkie.
I have an appointment with my shrink, and I want to tell her what's been going on regarding my housing situation, but I worry she's going to ask questions about my current living situation and I don't know if I should lie or not. As this person, is incredibly important to me and they have given me two amazing nephews whose safety I value above all. If I tell the truth, there is a chance I'll be encouraged to leave said situation and abandon said person in that situation. Yet if I lie, then I have to endure. I'm good at enduring, extremely good at it might I brag.
Okay, long story short. I want advice on if I should tell the truth or lie. I don't mind being homeless and have been since the age of 15, but I also kinda want to have a warm bed to sleep in instead of an anti-homeless bench.
