Title. Its too much to go on. I think everyone is going to hurt me because they always had. Im scared to go outside, and haven't seen a doctor in years. Should I try seeing a doctor or should I just kill myself now?
Vizzy
DEAD
- May 6, 2023
- 1,869
That's your call to see a doctor or not , do as you like
FuneralCry
Just wanting some peace
- Sep 24, 2020
- 38,925
With questions like this it's always a personal decision deciding what to do.
MeltingBrain
Mage
- May 29, 2023
- 580
In my opinion you should definitively try seeing a doctor. You have really nothing to lose. While killing yourself is permanent and irreversible action, seeing a doctor can only help you get a new perspective which you otherwise would not see. As I have said, there is nothing to lose, so defititively give it a chance.
The choice is up to you. Just don't tell the doctor anything about your CTB plans / ideas, you don't wanna be sent to a psych ward in the worst case. I wish you all the best!
love_peep
Specialist
- May 26, 2023
- 313
you should definitely try it even if it doesn't help in any way you tried
yeah this absolutely true dont talk them that you wanna ctb just tell about your depression or what you have there
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soontobedone
Leave blank
- Feb 27, 2023
- 314
mitsurumors
She sells seashells on the seashore 🎶
- Jun 11, 2023
- 18
I'd say definitely go check a doctor. I mean it depends on where you are, but maybe there is a solution to your problems. I feel you being scared of going outside, maybe you can call a doctor in? But it's your decision in the end
I can't afford to call a doctor in, and I am afraid of going outside because of people. I haven't visited a dentist, or doctor, or much of anything outside because of this. I feel like everyone is going to hurt me. Last time I went to the dentist one of the woman there intentionally stabbed my gums, having waited for all the others to have left the room. She stared at me, glaring to see if I would react. This was after everything thing had been concluded, there was no need for this. I said it did and she stabbed my gums again with enough force I jolted back in my seat. She snatched the tool out my mouth and stormed out of the room. I was bleeding from the area, from my inner cheek to my right wisdom tooth there was a gash. Most people in that office behave that way, but they are identical to most people I've encountered.
I understand that this is a terrifiying ecperience but in your your OP you asked whether to see a doctor before CTB or not. So if you do not want to talk to a doctor ot see one, which is fine, then what's the question. Unfortunately there are not so many other options left then. I imagine you are trapped in a very personal and difficult situation and I hope you can finde a peaceful way out if it. I wish you all th best!
I don't know if I should place myself in a position of vulnerability again. Maybe if I went to a doctor I could get help, and maybe the suffering will lessen. I want to see a doctor, I want things to get better. But there is a likely chance I will be hurt or committed. I'm covered in so many scars. If I get committed I will lose all autonomy and I can't escape. I'm so scared because all the power will be in the hands of people who can do whatever they want to me. I want the pain to stop and end it all, but I don't want to hurt my family.
I can fully relate to your situation that you are trapped in and it seems like to be and endless downward spiral. The first question you would have to answer yourself is wehther you know the reason and the source and whether this could be cured with therapy and/or meds. If you know the reason this could be a good anchor point to give it at least a serious try. But ofc I'm aware that this is a tough task and it needs a lot of efforts. Would you have additional support from family/loved ones if you decided to try?
I neither know your age nor your personal situatiuon but I can fully understand your concerns of losing your autonomy in making your own decisions. It's really a tough situaton for you. Though my personal situation is probably completely different to yours, I also don't want to hurt my family with CTB although to me it's the only way out.
Pidgeons_Sparrows
-flying rat
- Apr 16, 2023
- 627
maybe. though do keep in mind there is a risk that you can get locked up in a psych ward or something and 9 times out of 10 thats hell on earth
getfree05
Member
- Jul 3, 2023
- 39
Short answer : no you can try figuring out things urself or maybe do some research on ur symptoms and try solving stuff (if u want)
jacrispy
nihilist
- Jun 19, 2023
- 213
100% agreed. this community is very supportive regardless of whether you choose to live or CTB. however, telling a doctor about suicidal thoughts will make them want to have you admitted to a psych facility, which will most likely make you feel worse. this site is full of horror stories regarding people's experiences in those facilities.
Absolutely 
see a doctor. You might get lucky and find medication that works really well for you. You might just have to try 1 or two. Sometimes it takes years. Sure, some people are never helped, but it's worth trying. You only get one shot at life, so if it's possible to be one of the lucky ones who enjoy life, it's worth it
see a doctor. You might get lucky and find medication that works really well for you. You might just have to try 1 or two. Sometimes it takes years. Sure, some people are never helped, but it's worth trying. You only get one shot at life, so if it's possible to be one of the lucky ones who enjoy life, it's worth it
HopefulSleep
Wants to sleep
- Apr 24, 2023
- 888
Depending on what medication it is it could also be a torturous experience, I never felt as much mental pain as on antipsychotics.
There are also anti depressants but hat mostly doesn't work anyway.
Every strong downer that makes life bearable is physically addictive.
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