Venting Severe pain

[absolute failure]

I hate my life and I feel more and more pain. It needs to stop i feel like i lost my sanity. I need to ctb sooner than later. I feel so awful and miserable, i wanna scream but i cant. i wish it would just all end right now. I have truly lost the plot. If anyone knew how i would feel i would be put back immediately to the ward. Its awful. Only 2 options:
Suffer and deal with it.
Ctb and be a loser.
Anyways, i hope you all had a better day than me

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

I've been a loser so long I know it's a done deal. Now suicide is a battle with pain and willpower. I want to do it, I can't do it.

 

[absolute failure]

I've been a loser so long I know it's a done deal. Now suicide is a battle with pain and willpower. I want to do it, I can't do it.

What is stopping you? For me: my mom would be sad. Thats pretty much it.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

What is stopping you? For me: my mom would be sad. Thats pretty much it.

Fear of the squeeze of the noose. Fear of being interrupted and surviving. My dad having to find my body.