Archness
Defective Personel
- Jan 20, 2023
- 490
Increasingly I see though these illusions my brain reactionary makes to encourage me to live.
These "potentials", these "goals", these "gifts I have", "Interesting things to do/work_on", etc etc. When one is disproved, another one is made up in it's place. I'm no writer, no game-dev, no coder, no artist, no idea person, nothing; But the brain recycles those basic baits, reforming and repainting them.
It's all a pattern, a cycle of false hope (I almost fell for it again). I know that now, I can see through the illusion now. I see, I'd prefer to be dead, then live the false life I'd inevitably find myself in.
These "potentials", these "goals", these "gifts I have", "Interesting things to do/work_on", etc etc. When one is disproved, another one is made up in it's place. I'm no writer, no game-dev, no coder, no artist, no idea person, nothing; But the brain recycles those basic baits, reforming and repainting them.
It's all a pattern, a cycle of false hope (I almost fell for it again). I know that now, I can see through the illusion now. I see, I'd prefer to be dead, then live the false life I'd inevitably find myself in.