School and my friends

[an0n1]

I'm so tired of everything. Everyday I wake up with barely any energy, I don't even know if it's a physical or mental thing.

While I wait for class to start, I go on my phone, trying to ignore the jealousy that creeps up behind me at seeing everyone else so happy with each other. Even now, I'm writing this during Spanish class. My friends aren't doing anything. I wonder if they're tired of me already. I feel so alone.

I feel like a spare tire to my friends. They only talk to me when they're main friends aren't there.

Let's call one of them friend A.

Friend A has another very good friend, and I don't mind. I don't want to force them to always stay with me 24/7, and I'm not salty that they have other friends. What I am mad about is how they always choose that friend over me. I thought we were close, but it turns out they and their other friends had a temporary fallout, and he had no other choice to stay with me.

Friend A and their friends made up a while ago and now we barely talk.

Friend B is a nice person. Quiet with a bit of a wilder side. She has many other friends and we were never that close, it's no wonder we don't talk much.

They aren't making me feel like this on purpose, atleast I don't think they are. I know it's best to communicate with them about how I'm feeling, but I'm too scared to mention it. I think I'm starting to hate both of them. I stopped trying to talk to them, because why should I? Why am I the one that has to keep this friendship alive?

I'm so tired of everything, but I don't want to die. I just want the world to end already.

I want to go to sleep and never wake up.

 

[FuneralCry]

It's just the unfortunate reality that you cannot rely on other people in this world, but it's certainly true that there's too much suffering in existing, it's such a dreadful existence where people suffer all through no fault of their own and it's really understandable just wishing to never wake. But anyway in my opinion, those people don't really sound like friends and sound like they are best avoided, I wish you the best.

 

[EternalShore]

Yeahhh, it super sucks, but people don't really care much about others one bit! :( Please do try your best to keep both of your friends tho. Having those 2 is certainly better than having no one! :( I know, due to having no one >_<