Scared, very scared

[annxietty]

So Im giving life a chance, because I said to myself that I had to actually live before killing myself, and to me (this, of course, is a personal opinion) to live a "normal" life you have to find a job, and work... being part of the society?? You know what Im saying... Ive been looking for a job since Ive moved here, and tomorrow Im going to a public employment service (I dont know if Im translating it right lol) to inscribe myself so they can help me find a job, and Im so fucking scared, so so scared, so anxious... Working sounds like hell to me, Im so scared and I cant imagine myself working, I know many people here have it harder than me and they manage to work and Ive always admired that, because how do you do that? Im scared, very scared.
Im going with my sister, and she thinks Im "cured" from depression and suicidal thoughts (lol) so she thinks Im not that scared ???? idk Im scared

 

[WonderingSoul]

I wish you the best of luck. I remember my first time it was pretty scary. It still kinda is even though I've been working for a while, but you get used to the exposure after a while. I think the important thing is to not push yourself too hard.

 

[Old Friend]

I understand the feeling. I managed to get full-time employment in February. I thought it might help me out of my problems but it just wore me down and made me worse. I'm signed off sick atm.

It might work out for you though. Good luck.