Venting Relationship loneliness

[d-tea]

I can't help but vent about my relationship again before I overthink myself into a crisis situation.
I'm sure some people can relate
Idk how much I can trust my feelings and how much I am "exaggerating" and making it worse for myself.

Anyways
I feel so lonely. Yesterday night I walked half an hour home from my partners place because I couldn't stop crying and I thought I couldn't wake them up; today they text me(bc I let them know where I was so they wouldn't have to worry) that they were tired and just wanted to sleep... so they knew? They noticed and didn't respond to me waking them up because I was hysterically crying and couldn't calm down... because they wanted to sleep? It's not like this is a regular occurrence... then I'd understand, maybe. Why did they just ignore me? How do you not care when someone you love is suffering? They tell me that they do but I feel so unwanted most of the time. How much of that is my mind and how much is reasonable? Am I overreacting?

 

[EmptyBottle]

That's not good, they crossed the limit of things to not ignore, namely, serious distress.

 

[Long Live Me !]

I don't think you're overeating, i'd advise you to talk to them in face to face about it. Hope you're doing okay !

 

[d-tea]

That's not good, they crossed the limit of things to not ignore, namely, serious distress.

I am going to ask them today if they really did notice that tonight or if I might've just misunderstood... they just don't have time right now.

I'm trying so hard to save the relationship, I don't want to overwhelm them or make problems, I know they're basically traumatised from my last attempt a year ago and I don't think they've ever really digested that, mentally
But I want to be honest and open with them

They tell me they can't help but think of "bad times" when looking at me and that makes it hard to be close and intimate, but they don't want to lose me and they do love me
I'm so worried that sharing will just make them be more distant...

 

[Griever]