recovery or suicide

[kittyswift]

I feel like im kind of stuck between trying to recover, and following through with my sui plans. its like half of me wants to recover, and the other half wants to CTB. before i 100% make up my mind about following through i want to make sure i have exhausted every other possible option (if there even are options?) but what i kind of wanted some input for is how do i know that i have done everything i can to try and improve my life? i take my meds, i have tried therapy (CBT, DBT, trauma counselling), i try to give myself something to stay alive for but time and time again its never ever enough. i have been trying and trying for years and years but it sometimes feels like im only prolonging my suffering my having what feels like false hope about my life getting better. what else is there for me to do before completing my plan?

 

[carac]

Do you know why you feel this way? You can't fix something if you don't know what is broken. I think you are on the right lines, there are lots of different things you can try but different things work for different people so it's about keept trying until you find what works but unless you know what is wrong is the first place you are just punching in the dark.

 

[Dot]

Therapy Methods & Alternatives Explained

"If you want to help someone you need to know something about them" - 'It's A Wonderful Life' Considering therapy but don't know where to start? Hopefully this can be a starting point about what all those different terms mean, and help to pick the right therapist. There are also options further...

sanctioned-suicide.net

Fl free t/ ask questns abt n.e of thse

 

[kittyswift]

Therapy Methods & Alternatives Explained

"If you want to help someone you need to know something about them" - 'It's A Wonderful Life' Considering therapy but don't know where to start? Hopefully this can be a starting point about what all those different terms mean, and help to pick the right therapist. There are also options further...

sanctioned-suicide.net

Fl free t/ ask questns abt n.e of thse

thank you!! this looks very helpful

 

[Mayonaise]

I feel like im kind of stuck between trying to recover, and following through with my sui plans. its like half of me wants to recover, and the other half wants to CTB. before i 100% make up my mind about following through i want to make sure i have exhausted every other possible option (if there even are options?) but what i kind of wanted some input for is how do i know that i have done everything i can to try and improve my life? i take my meds, i have tried therapy (CBT, DBT, trauma counselling), i try to give myself something to stay alive for but time and time again its never ever enough. i have been trying and trying for years and years but it sometimes feels like im only prolonging my suffering my having what feels like false hope about my life getting better. what else is there for me to do before completing my plan?

I'm glad to hear you're still sticking to recovery, even with almost no hope. Your question is hard to answer but what @carac said is very wise and kind, and right now I can't think of anything more useful to say.
As far as medical procedures are concerned, some people have improved their symptoms by undergoing trans-cranial magnetic stimulation (TMS) or electro-convulsive therapy (ECT), the latter is quite different from the "electro-shock" you see in movies. Another therapy is the deep brain stimulation, but it involves surgery and may not be effective against mood disorders, BPD or OCD. These kind of treatments must be obviously discussed with your docs.
The real issue, imho, is the source of your problem. It may be a simple chemical imbalance in the brain or a psychologically-fueled issue, and everything inbetween.
Sorry not to be of much help right now but you look like a sweet, kind person and wanted to send you some love.

 

[kittyswift]

Do you know why you feel this way? You can't fix something if you don't know what is broken. I think you are on the right lines, there are lots of different things you can try but different things work for different people so it's about keept trying until you find what works but unless you know what is wrong is the first place you are just punching

I'm glad to hear you're still sticking to recovery, even with almost no hope. Your question is hard to answer but what @carac said is very wise and kind, and right now I can't think of anything more useful to say.
As far as medical procedures are concerned, some people have improved their symptoms by undergoing trans-cranial magnetic stimulation (TMS) or electro-convulsive therapy (ECT), the latter is quite different from the "electro-shock" you see in movies. Another therapy is the deep brain stimulation, but it involves surgery and may not be effective against mood disorders, BPD or OCD. These kind of treatments must be obviously discussed with your docs.
The real issue, imho, is the source of your problem. It may be a simple chemical imbalance in the brain or a psychologically-fueled issue, and everything inbetween.
Sorry not to be of much help right now but you look like a sweet, kind person and wanted to send you some love.

thank you! i think my quality of life would be improved a lot if i could find a way to manage my mental illnesses but that is appearing to be very challenging. i think thats the main issue anyway. i visited my psychiatrist today and we are trying a new medication so heres to hoping it can help me :) thank you for your response

 

[Mayonaise]

thank you! i think my quality of life would be improved a lot if i could find a way to manage my mental illnesses but that is appearing to be very challenging. i think thats the main issue anyway. i visited my psychiatrist today and we are trying a new medication so heres to hoping it can help me :) thank you for your response

My pleasure Kitty. Keep in touch if you need to talk.