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howunfortunateforme

Experienced
Oct 2, 2024
242
I genuinely didn't think you did meant any disrespect at all. And I apologise if I come across harsh as that is most definitely not my intention. I think we all have inner battles when choosing a method.

completely! I also have the fear of physically damaging myself long term and surviving if it was jumping. And as most have probably seen, I am a firm no on trains as I hate the thought of forcing someone to be a part of my CTB.
SI will always rear its head somehow, but for whatever reason, I don't have that with SN.
Salty death water (as someone referred to it as and it's forever stuck) - I have drank much worse at parties and coped with the vomiting and the hangover the next day.
You are so right and I'm sorry I was insensitive you weren't harsh at all totally right in what you're saying. I guess I'm just so overwhelmed bc there is so much conflicting information on how to do it i prob just need to do more
Research.
 
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sadlittleman32

sadlittleman32

Was going to jump…now using SN
Sep 17, 2024
113
I genuinely didn't think you did meant any disrespect at all. And I apologise if I come across harsh as that is most definitely not my intention. I think we all have inner battles when choosing a method.

completely! I also have the fear of physically damaging myself long term and surviving if it was jumping. And as most have probably seen, I am a firm no on trains as I hate the thought of forcing someone to be a part of my CTB.
SI will always rear its head somehow, but for whatever reason, I don't have that with SN.
Salty death water (as someone referred to it as and it's forever stuck) - I have drank much worse at parties and coped with the vomiting and the hangover the next day.
Yeah compared to all the drugs I have put into my body some salt water doesn't seem like much…and I have the same mindset as you that I am very firm on the fact that I do not want to traumatize or involve anyone else in my ctb plans and would like to do it from the comfort of my own room in my bed!
 
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U

Unspoken7612

Specialist
Jul 14, 2024
358
I do think SN is significantly less peaceful than nitrogen. That is balanced by it being easier (especially in that it's easier to hide a bag of SN than a canister of N, if that's a consideration), and the apparent lower risk of brain damage if discovered. But nitrogen is apparently completely painless and causes much quicker loss of consciousness.
 
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nihilistic_dragon

nihilistic_dragon

Dead already. Just need to dispose of my body now.
Aug 6, 2024
667
Which post are you referring to??
 
F

Fangarina

Student
Sep 9, 2024
148
Yeah compared to all the drugs I have put into my body some salt water doesn't seem like much…and I have the same mindset as you that I am very firm on the fact that I do not want to traumatize or involve anyone else in my ctb plans and would like to do it from the comfort of my own room in my bed!
Exactly this. I live alone, so I will pass at home with zero disturbances. Thank the lord for my part era because this should be a walk in the park…

I do think SN is significantly less peaceful than nitrogen. That is balanced by it being easier (especially in that it's easier to hide a bag of SN than a canister of N, if that's a consideration), and the apparent lower risk of brain damage if discovered. But nitrogen is apparently completely painless and causes much quicker loss of consciousness.

Wait. I thought the N people refer to is not Nitrogen, but Nembutal. Although both are redundant as they are impossible to get in the UK.
I have looked at the inert gas method, but I think there are too many risk factors in it and I need a firm method that won't fail me.
I'd love a proper nitrogen passing if it's genuinely as peaceful and fast - why is everything illegal 😭
 
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howunfortunateforme

Experienced
Oct 2, 2024
242
I think that's why sn is so popular now I'm so scared to do it but know it's the only option I have left
 
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N

newjourney

Member
Jul 1, 2024
59
After reading Plato's post I am absolutely terrified. May he Rest In Peace. How heroic and brave. Anyone else now even more terrified of sn? It's all I have besides train access.
I get the shock but why spread further anxiety about ctb?

I don't think it sounded bad at all. That is a pretty standard SN experience without the use of benzos. I'll be doing it almost exactly the same in a few days time. Just SN and AE, no benzos or antacid etc

Personally, this has made me feel so much better about everything. I realise it can go much worse than this but here's to hoping it's quicker. Anyways, I know the reality of it is sometimes hard to digest but for many of us we have fully come to terms with everything. I think this is key. If you have any doubts then I think the SI is going to take hold and you have to get passed that to ctb successfully.
 
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howunfortunateforme

Experienced
Oct 2, 2024
242
I have such extreme si bc I'm so unsure of protocol but you're right
 
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athiestjoe

athiestjoe

Passenger
Sep 24, 2024
410
First, you tried to derail my honor post for Plato despite a very clear, and reasonable, request that people do not do that. Then, you create this separate post for fear mongering. All of your posts on the site have been frequent, all over the place [1] and perhaps you are just really struggling which I don't want to take away from that. I get it. But I suggest you think before you hit reply or post more topics first about how others might feel and also do your own research. In one topic you completely disregarded someone who was trying to be helpful and just went straight to negative replies. They sent you places to get meto, someone replied on the post they were looking for meto, then you reasked only to get called out by that person as they provided you three pharmacies for it, then only to change your tune that you were concerned about customs. It's confusing what your intentions are here. If you enjoy this site, then enjoy it. Be part of the community. In some posts you claim to have had EPS from Meto but then couldn't recall why or even how you got the dose of Meto that allegedly caused it [2], then a few hours later tried to source Meto [3][4]. It's inconsistent at best (or worse perhaps disingenous). Are you just trying to get reactions? What is your actual motive? These are rhetorical questions, please do not answer. It seems you are finding any and every reason to not use SN and THAT IS FINE! If SN isn't for you, it isn't for you! It's truly that simple, find another method that may be better for you. If you are even looking for a method in all seriousness, maybe you are just curious and that is also a-okay. There is no rush to making whatever decisions you want to make for yourself. Pump the breaks!

This post seems to be aimed at provoking anxiety and stress in others, and I'm not sure why you are doing it. Nor do I want to know, but enough. I understand that you may be feeling anxious yourself. I encourage you to do more research and take your time. However, there's no need to turn this site into a space for panic or chaos, especially for those who are already finding what they are looking for. While it's important to focus on your own well-being, your approach thus far here hasn't been helpful to those also on this site. Please reflect on your motives and please learn to respect others.

Plato was always thoughtful and kind in their replies to you, yet you're using their CTB as an opportunity to create needless chaos for some damn reason. It's really disheartening to see you take advantage of someone who treated you with such kindness. That doesn't sit well with me.

I wish you all the best, truly, but I urge you to stop disrupting conversations and spreading confusion.

Out of respect for Plato, I would encourage others to not engage on this particular post further.
 
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howunfortunateforme

Experienced
Oct 2, 2024
242
First, you tried to derail my honor post for Plato despite a very clear, and reasonable, request that people do not do that. Then, you create this separate post for fear mongering. All of your posts on the site have been frequent, all over the place [1] and perhaps you are just really struggling which I don't want to take away from that. I get it. But I suggest you think before you hit reply or post more topics first about how others might feel and also do your own research first. In one topic you completely disregarded someone who was trying to be helpful and just went straight to negative replies. They sent you places to get meto, someone replied on the post they were looking for meto, then you reasked only to get called out by that person as they provided you three pharmacies for it, then only to change your tune that you were concerned about customs. It's confusing what your intentions are here. If you enjoy this site, then enjoy it. Be part of the community. In some posts you claim to have had EPS from Meto but then couldn't recall why or even how you got the dose of Meto that allegedly caused it [2], then a few hours later tried to source Meto [3][4]. It's inconsistent at best (or worse perhaps disingenous). Are you just trying to get reactions? What is your actual motive? These are rhetorical questions, please do not answer. It seems you are finding any and every reason to not use SN and THAT IS FINE! If SN isn't for you, it isn't for you! It's truly that simple, find another method that may be better for you. If you are even looking for a method in all seriousness, maybe you are just curious and that is also a-okay. There is no rush to making whatever decisions you want to make for yourself. Pump the breaks!

This post seems to be aimed at provoking anxiety and stress in others, and I'm not sure why you are doing it. Nor do I want to know, but enough. I understand that you may be feeling anxious yourself. I encourage you to do more research and take your time. However, there's no need to turn this site into a space for panic or chaos, especially for those who are already finding what they are looking for. While it's important to focus on your own well-being, your approach thus far here hasn't been helpful to those also on this site. Please reflect on your motives and please learn to respect others.

Plato was always thoughtful and kind in their replies to you, yet you're using their CTB as an opportunity to create needless chaos for some damn reason. It's really disheartening to see you take advantage of someone who treated you with such kindness. That doesn't sit well with me.

I wish you all the best, truly, but I urge you to stop disrupting conversations and spreading confusion.

Out of respect for Plato, I would encourage others to not engage on this particular post further.
Who Tf are you? Every post or search is panic and chaos people who are suffering mentally and physically which that alone will make you hysterical then seeing conflicting info? I acknowledged my wrong doing and said no disrespect. I haven't turned this site into panic and chaos I've asked questions and questioned things which is logical since we're talking death here. If I could turn a page into chaos that would
Make me pretty poweful. I've asked questions and challenged things sure that's normal when you want to be done with your life and sorry this is "new territory " for me. Are you Evelyn by the way?? I got snarky remarks from her by simply asking questions
 
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F

Fangarina

Student
Sep 9, 2024
148
Who Tf are you? Every post or search is panic and chaos people who are suffering mentally and physically which that alone will make you hysterical then seeing conflicting info? I acknowledged my wrong doing and said no disrespect. I haven't turned this site into panic and chaos I've asked questions and questioned things which is logical since we're talking death here. If I could turn a page into chaos that would
Make me pretty poweful. I've asked questions and challenged things sure that's normal when you want to be done with your life and sorry this is "new territory " for me. Are you Evelyn by the way?? I got snarky remarks from her by simply asking questions

Ahhh I wasn't going to reply to this but I have to.

Joe is Platos friend. And I think he is quite justified to be upset with the content of this thread. Emotions are raw, he has been very intertwined with his passing and posted a beautiful post in honour of him, with a very educational timeline for us.
I think you need to understand he is not being passive aggressive here, and has actually been quite kind in most of what he says. I feel like had it been me who had to come by and read a thread with my friends name in it with the same stuff, I'd have been way less passive.

Everyone here understands the desperation, the fear, the finality of our decisions. Everyone also understands the desire to know everything in depth so we can make these decisions with a clear mind of what and how. It's new territory for most of us. That's why we encourage others to read the older threads, check people's protocols and timelines. Treading carefully on sensitive posts is key here.
Rather than blowing up, maybe accept that Joe is also feeling fragile right now, more so than any of us can mirror because he had direct links with Plato and this situation is also new territory for him.

I am a firm believer that everyone here needs to find a way to have each others backs. Hopefully this can be slept on, and a line drawn under it going forwards.
 
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howunfortunateforme

Experienced
Oct 2, 2024
242
Ahhh I wasn't going to reply to this but I have to.

Joe is Platos friend. And I think he is quite justified to be upset with the content of this thread. Emotions are raw, he has been very intertwined with his passing and posted a beautiful post in honour of him, with a very educational timeline for us.
I think you need to understand he is not being passive aggressive here, and has actually been quite kind in most of what he says. I feel like had it been me who had to come by and read a thread with my friends name in it with the same stuff, I'd have been way less passive.

Everyone here understands the desperation, the fear, the finality of our decisions. Everyone also understands the desire to know everything in depth so we can make these decisions with a clear mind of what and how. It's new territory for most of us. That's why we encourage others to read the older threads, check people's protocols and timelines. Treading carefully on sensitive posts is key here.
Rather than blowing up, maybe accept that Joe is also feeling fragile right now, more so than any of us can mirror because he had direct links with Plato and this situation is also new territory for him.

I am a firm believer that everyone here needs to find a way to have each others backs. Hopefully this can be slept on, and a line drawn under it going forwards.
You're right I'm sorry 🥲
 
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D

DOHARDTHINGS24

Specialist
Apr 30, 2024
376
Plato's legacy is to dispel fear & spread information, instead of misinformation.
You are entitled to any & every opinion that you have & want to share here. Absolutely.
But as their friend, I'm actually shaking to be reading this. My whole body.
Again, all of your thoughts & fears are yours & I won't diminish or invalidate them.
But I will ask you, very politely, please remove Plato's name from the title of this post. And if you can't, ask a mod to do it for you.
This dishonours them & pains me greatly.
So keep your thread if you need it, refer to recent GBT's, whatever helps you.
But to help Plato keep their legacy intact, please, please do the respectful thing.
 
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HighFlight

HighFlight

Global Mod
Jun 28, 2023
643
Plato's legacy is to dispel fear & spread information, instead of misinformation.

From what I can see, Plato shared their experience to help inform others who may follow. I've removed their name from the title of this thread so they can be remembered as someone with good intentions. Discussion about the technical aspects of what they did may continue. However, regardless of your views on technique, Plato provided valuable information which you can use to when determining you own paths. They deserve our love and respect.
 
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D

DOHARDTHINGS24

Specialist
Apr 30, 2024
376
From what I can see, Plato shared their experience to help inform others who may follow. I've removed their name from the title of this thread so they can be remembered as someone with good intentions. Discussion about the technical aspects of what they did may continue. However, regardless of your views on technique, Plato provided valuable information which you can use to when determining you own paths. They deserve our love and respect.
Thank you so much for responding to the report. I believe in free speech & the right of every person here to voice their opinions & experiences.
Even when they differ wildly from mine.
Which is why I only took issue with the title, not the contents.
We need to respect other people & not use their name in ways they may not have wanted, at a time they cannot respond.
Including myself obviously, but I have a million messages from Plato that would only prove my point.
I feel uncomfortable speaking for Plato.
I would feel more uncomfortable by letting them down & not putting my Batman cape on one more time. (Please let it be the last time 🤣)
Mods / admins here are doing a true service & are appreciated.
Thank you
 
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willow115

willow115

Member
Oct 9, 2024
60
People please. You are poisoning your self and dying. From what I read that was not terrible. Other poisons can be brutal. Even dying of natural causes isn't always peaceful. YOU ARE DYING. Not trying to start any arguments just saying you know?
This is the truth.
Who Tf are you? Every post or search is panic and chaos people who are suffering mentally and physically which that alone will make you hysterical then seeing conflicting info? I acknowledged my wrong doing and said no disrespect. I haven't turned this site into panic and chaos I've asked questions and questioned things which is logical since we're talking death here. If I could turn a page into chaos that would
Make me pretty poweful. I've asked questions and challenged things sure that's normal when you want to be done with your life and sorry this is "new territory " for me. Are you Evelyn by the way?? I got snarky remarks from her by simply asking questions
I feel you. This site is for a range of expression and questions.

There's mild to moderate discomfort and vomit in sn unfortunately. It's the best we got for poison. It's no N, but follow an established protocol and you're likely to succeed. I've never seen the discomfort reported as extreme.

I used to post like you on sn when I wasn't ready to die and circumstances were forcing my hand. I'm much deeper now so I see sn in a different light. We need to think deeply about what's fueling our si. Maybe you don't want to vomit your way out or maybe you don't want to go. I truly wish you relief on your journey either way.
 
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Unspoken7612

Specialist
Jul 14, 2024
358
Wait. I thought the N people refer to is not Nitrogen, but Nembutal. Although both are redundant as they are impossible to get in the UK.
I have looked at the inert gas method, but I think there are too many risk factors in it and I need a firm method that won't fail me.
I'd love a proper nitrogen passing if it's genuinely as peaceful and fast - why is everything illegal 😭
On this forum, "N" usually means Nembutal, which is unfortunate because it's the international chemical symbol for Nitrogen.

There are many retailers selling it in the UK, although I haven't actually tried to buy so maybe it's harder than I realise. I think it would be pretty straightforward if I had a car, but because I'd need delivery that makes it harder.
 
F

Fangarina

Student
Sep 9, 2024
148
On this forum, "N" usually means Nembutal, which is unfortunate because it's the international chemical symbol for Nitrogen.

There are many retailers selling it in the UK, although I haven't actually tried to buy so maybe it's harder than I realise. I think it would be pretty straightforward if I had a car, but because I'd need delivery that makes it harder.

I had searched for it previously but my understanding was it would only be sold commercially to a business. I had seen how impossible it is to get N and written that off as Nembutal and stopped bothering.
A quick google search again and this is not the case, this is actually very interesting. I have been so set on SN, and have purchased it and have everything needed (apart from my benzos) however… I may sway if this is more accessible than I thought because I think this would be a more peaceful way. Food for thought and more research needed. Thank you!
 
T

Tonkpils

Member
Jul 12, 2024
44
But what if you throw them up and how much?
You should check the SN mega thread for proper protocol but the idea is to take the benzos beforehand so they are kicking in by the time you drink the SN, so vomiting at that point wouldn't affect them.
 
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howunfortunateforme

Experienced
Oct 2, 2024
242
You should check the SN mega thread for proper protocol but the idea is to take the benzos beforehand so they are kicking in by the time you drink the SN, so vomiting at that point wouldn't affect them.
But you wouldn't vommit them up?
 
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howunfortunateforme

Experienced
Oct 2, 2024
242
How do you crush them up and how much?? I have Valium and klonopin
 
C

coffeebeany

Student
Jul 12, 2024
111
So i have diazepam (liquid) and i was wondering. If I take the benzo before hand and pass out I wouldn't be able to drink a second cup of SN if I vomit? Any thoughts on that ?
 
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howunfortunateforme

Experienced
Oct 2, 2024
242
So i have diazepam (liquid) and i was wondering. If I take the benzo before hand and pass out I wouldn't be able to drink a second cup of SN if I vomit? Any thoughts on that ?
My concern
 
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F

Fangarina

Student
Sep 9, 2024
148
I think the second cup is more precautionary incase you vomit immediately due to the taste etc. So before it actually gets into your system and takes hold.
25g/ 30g of SN is a mega amount, and one cup is usually sufficient. It absorbs fast and it's after it's stated to absorb that you vomit because your body is trying to fight the poison. My understanding is it's too late by then.
If 6g/ sprinkles on food mistaken for regular salt etc has previously lost people their lives, I'm going to sit heavy on the assumption that the amount we take is overkill so it's a certainty and most don't actually use the second cup.
 
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Lost Magic

Lost Magic

Illuminated
May 5, 2020
3,144
No method is without risks and potential side-effects. SN is a poison after all. However, it is still a much more peaceful passing than a lot of other methods.
 
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M

Manfrotto99

Specialist
Oct 10, 2023
307
I was having second thoughts about SN but I have watched my mother call out in immense pain for 12 hours before being given strong enough meds to kill the pain that finally ended it all. She choose to die at home. It was terrifying. She had cancer. From what I hear, this is not uncommon. The process of dying and the body shutting down is seldom a pleasant one. It is not just the physical pain but this is often coupled with intense fear, hallucinations, panic attacks and anxiety. 30 minuetes or so of pain really is minimal compared to what many of people go through when dying. I tell myself, why should I expect to get off any easier if I take my own life or die any another way.
 
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Noct

Noct

L'appel du vide
Sep 1, 2024
32
I don't give fuck how painful and scary it is I can take the pain and I will do it

That doesn't sound that bad
This is my perspective also. 15 minutes of elevated discomfort is worth being done with it all.
 
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howunfortunateforme

Experienced
Oct 2, 2024
242
But do you scream out in pain with sn? Anxiety will be a bitch how soon to pass out? I hear 15 minutes so scared but I have been in extreme physical pain for a 1.5 years along with insomnia and compromised vision so I'm ready don't want to go but don't have a choice no curing my issues I just want to avoid calling for help phoebes video looked so peaceful
 
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