Ready but dont know how

[Susan Caswell]

I am so ready i cant take this tinnitus any longer i must come across so stupid and i was anything but i think im waiting for this to stop or someone for me. Ive tried to order N and SN and failed is there anything else i need out of this torture i can stand a lot but not this roaring tinnitus both ears but the amplifying i cant take or this level of anxiety and i was calmest person all my life until i woke up with this 3 years its taken terrible toll on me physically and mentally and i was so healthy and well can anyone stope this tinnitus for me i cant take it that loud my ears are vibrating just not come life was perfect i dont even know cause never had ear trouble in my life came on from nowhere wish just stop and let me get well can anyone help me

 

[CC123]

All About Tinnitus (Ringing in the Ears)

Tinnitus is ringing or buzzing in the ears that can interfere with how you hear other sounds. Discover a range of causes and treatments.

www.healthline.com

Maybe something here that can be of help

 

[TheQ22]

I know you've been to the dentist Susan, but why don't you try the hot / cold test on your teeth with some ice and something really hot. If any of them give you serious pain you could have an absess that isn't picked up by xrays etc.

I know it's a long shot, but something must be causing it, right? And I gave you that link to that dental specialist where loads of peoples tinnitus is caused by teeth problems.

So since you're at the point of wanting to die, is sticking a few ice cubes in your mouth, then some hot stuff much of a trial or tribulation before taking the ultimate step? Even if you think it's a waste of time.

 

[Susan Caswell]

I know you've been to the dentist Susan, but why don't you try the hot / cold test on your teeth with some ice and something really hot. If any of them give you serious pain you could have an absess that isn't picked up by xrays etc.

I know it's a long shot, but something must be causing it, right? And I gave you that link to that dental specialist where loads of peoples tinnitus is caused by teeth problems.

So since you're at the point of wanting to die, is sticking a few ice cubes in your mouth, then some hot stuff much of a trial or tribulation before taking the ultimate step? Even if you think it's a waste of time.

Thank you i have tried it and been to dentist no teeth or jaw problem just wish it was something they could find

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I don't have an easy response for you, Susan, and I can't tell you what to do. I do want to say, however, that I'm so sorry for all the pain you're experiencing and I think you are so strong for managing through it for so long.

 

[Susan Caswell]

All About Tinnitus (Ringing in the Ears)

Tinnitus is ringing or buzzing in the ears that can interfere with how you hear other sounds. Discover a range of causes and treatments.

www.healthline.com

Maybe something here that can be of help

Thank you dont think theres a cure ive tried everything there is many consultants and many therapies and why my anxiety is so bad now wish could find whats caused it nothing come up in MRIs or CT Scans just cant understand why its ear splitting and amplifying like it is i can stand a lot and have much pain in my life but this roaring never stops cant calm down tinnitus isnt ear splitting i feel there must be a cause but can i heck find it x

 

[CC123]

Clinical Trials | American Tinnitus Association

Clinical Trials ClinicalTrials.gov is a database of privately and publicly funded clinical studies conducted around the world. Enter "tinnitus" under the box "Condition or disease" to pull up tinnitus-related trials.

www.ata.org

Maybe something new out there
Thank you for your kind reply

 

[TheQ22]

Thank you i have tried it and been to dentist no teeth or jaw problem just wish it was something they could find

What about getting all metal fillings removed - in fact all metal whatever it is in your mouth removed - just in case it is a battery type effect?

I know it's all long shots but I'd go to the far end of a fart no matter how unlikely before taking the final step.

I mean if the MRI and CT scans and all the rest can't find anything, it must be something super unusual and very rare - which is probably why no ones thought of it?

 

[Susan Caswell]

I don't have an easy response for you, Susan, and I can't tell you what to do. I do want to say, however, that I'm so sorry for all the pain you're experiencing and I think you are so strong for managing through it for so long.

Thank you its broken me though and made me really ill and i wasnt i was so healthy happy living life to the full just cant believe its even happened wish it would just stop and id get myself built up and well cant believe such a cruel condition wont stop or continues to get worse to level i just cant stand managed for first few weeks but that was before the amplifying but ive been tortured out of my mind now for nearly 3 years just cant believe it or why i ate really healthy lived good clean life was very happy calm loved life how can this just come from nowhere no warning nothing it wasnt hearing loss or ear infection no loud noise wish someone knew how to stop it down to level i cold stand at least millions of people have it all manage live ok why me this now but deafening its a loud as Jet Plane roaring both ears but the amplifying i cant even stand my own voice this should be such a carefree happy time of life doing all i planned i worked so hard looked after everyone this cant be my fate and i never knew so hard to end your life never thought id have to consider such a thing if only not this nothing wold have made me suicidal id have coped with anything i cant think of a crueler condition its dementing no quiet peace i was such a quiet person hated noise how cruel i just cant stay like this if it was like start id be ok manage im sure all the meds for anxiety have made it this level and caused the hyperacusis let alone the terrible withdrawl getting off them i had no clue i keep thinking someone on here will know answer something to get it down i know people have messaged me on here with tinnitus and hyperacusis but cope i was so strong in mind not physically strong very strong in my mind but this has destroyed me please someone make it stop and let me live and be well i felt so well when this started id never felt better just cant understand it life cant be this cruel x

What about getting all metal fillings removed - in fact all metal whatever it is in your mouth removed - just in case it is a battery type effect?

I know it's all long shots but I'd go to the far end of a fart no matter how unlikely before taking the final step.

I mean if the MRI and CT scans and all the rest can't find anything, it must be something super unusual and very rare - which is probably why no ones thought of it?

I agree ive even been to Harley Street Tinnitus Clinic and they have never heard of anyone with tinnitus like this trust me x

Clinical Trials | American Tinnitus Association

Clinical Trials ClinicalTrials.gov is a database of privately and publicly funded clinical studies conducted around the world. Enter "tinnitus" under the box "Condition or disease" to pull up tinnitus-related trials.

www.ata.org

Maybe something new out there
Thank you for your kind reply

Ive tried to be Guinea Pig even for trials and research i thought someone would be interested from a severity point if nothing else oh how i wish i could message its stopped im ok what id give x

Clinical Trials | American Tinnitus Association

Clinical Trials ClinicalTrials.gov is a database of privately and publicly funded clinical studies conducted around the world. Enter "tinnitus" under the box "Condition or disease" to pull up tinnitus-related trials.

www.ata.org

Maybe something new out there
Thank you for your kind reply

No thank you your all so kind if kindness and prayers had stopped this id have ok long ago x

 

[Superdeterminist]

Reading about tinnitus, it doesn't sound like fun, to put it mildly. My sympathies to you for having to endure that torture. There are many such torturous diseases which should give pro-lifers pause about their stance against the right to die.

I read that tinnitus may be either subjective or objective, with most cases being subjective. I don't know which you suffer from, but I would hazard that it's subjective (correct me if you know). This would mean, in basic terms, that there is some kind of faulty circuit in your brain, or in your auditory nerves, that is causing those awful noises. It is therefore a case of learning about the circuits responsible, and how we might correct them or prevent them from becoming faulty in the first place. I'm just so sorry that progress is too slow and that humanity can't yet offer you a cure.

 

[Susan Caswell]

Reading about tinnitus, it doesn't sound like fun, to put it mildly. My sympathies to you for having to endure that torture. There are many such torturous diseases which should give pro-lifers pause about their stance against the right to die.

I read that tinnitus may be either subjective or objective, with most cases being subjective. I don't know which you suffer from, but I would hazard that it's subjective (correct me if you know). This would mean, in basic terms, that there is some kind of faulty circuit in your brain, or in your auditory nerves, that is causing those awful noises. It is therefore a case of learning about the circuits responsible, and how we might correct them or prevent them from becoming faulty in the first place. I'm just so sorry that progress is too slow and that humanity can't yet offer you a cure.

Thank you yes it Subjective type i wish it was Pulsatile that can usually be cured. Thank you for your kindness i cant say any other it is a living hell just wish it was like most people seem to get it and live ok with it trust me deafening i could cope with this if the amplifying would stop even my own voice i hear twice echoing distorted you know when speakers are cranked right up everything vibrates thats how everything is for me and it wasnt i coped until the amplifying came and the tinnitus was like car engine running now damn jet plane roaring i want my life but how it was all was good and was so well always looked after my health and ears always so careful with my ears the anxiety level will kill me at this rate lost 2 stone nearly all of my hair body jerking cant eat cant sleep i had such a busy life so many interests worked so hard 38 years this should be happy carefree time just wanted normal happy life i have to get going somehow before im insane they tortured people with noise and no sleep they broke or went crazy and that wasnt in their own ears wish i knew why there must be something making it louder and louder i dont think anyone could stand this 24/7 roaring hammering its driving me mental never stops its never even gone down a little in 3 years but it wsnt like this i coped for first 6 months never thought it could get any louder tried everything i can and everyone possible ive survived a terrible cancer and so ill from tinnitus but its the nature of this pounding your ears day after day night after night i just cant believe its happened to me i was so happy healthy calm id rather be battling cancer than this i wasnt this ill with that do you think theres anyone that could assist me help me legally i wouldnt want to get anyone into trouble im going to have to do this myself arent i and im truely terrified i keep thinking no way will it stay like this it will just go bang and stop i wish it was level i could stand and live ok with not got ill i pray and pray it will stop but its getting louder and louder God help me can you help me in anyway

 

[Superdeterminist]

Thank you yes it Subjective type i wish it was Pulsatile that can usually be cured. Thank you for your kindness i cant say any other it is a living hell just wish it was like most people seem to get it and live ok with it trust me deafening i could cope with this if the amplifying would stop even my own voice i hear twice echoing distorted you know when speakers are cranked right up everything vibrates thats how everything is for me and it wasnt i coped until the amplifying came and the tinnitus was like car engine running now damn jet plane roaring i want my life but how it was all was good and was so well always looked after my health and ears always so careful with my ears the anxiety level will kill me at this rate lost 2 stone nearly all of my hair body jerking cant eat cant sleep i had such a busy life so many interests worked so hard 38 years this should be happy carefree time just wanted normal happy life i have to get going somehow before im insane they tortured people with noise and no sleep they broke or went crazy and that wasnt in their own ears wish i knew why there must be something making it louder and louder i dont think anyone could stand this 24/7 roaring hammering its driving me mental never stops its never even gone down a little in 3 years but it wsnt like this i coped for first 6 months never thought it could get any louder tried everything i can and everyone possible ive survived a terrible cancer and so ill from tinnitus but its the nature of this pounding your ears day after day night after night i just cant believe its happened to me i was so happy healthy calm id rather be battling cancer than this i wasnt this ill with that do you think theres anyone that could assist me help me legally i wouldnt want to get anyone into trouble im going to have to do this myself arent i and im truely terrified i keep thinking no way will it stay like this it will just go bang and stop i wish it was level i could stand and live ok with not got ill i pray and pray it will stop but its getting louder and louder God help me can you help me in anyway

I'm not sure if there's any organisation which would approve assisted suicide for you, all I know is that it's very difficult currently, especially for those who aren't terminally ill. There is some chance however - it is not a complete impossibility. Wishing you the best and an end to your suffering.

 

[GravityUtilizer]

Try not to ever think about it. Have background noise on when quiet. I'm ten years in, mostly habituated. Of course everyone's experience is different but once I got the anxiety down it got easier.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

How did you fail ordering SN?

 

[Susan Caswell]

I'm not sure if there's any organisation which would approve assisted suicide for you, all I know is that it's very difficult currently, especially for those who aren't terminally ill. There is some chance however - it is not a complete impossibility. Wishing you the best and an end to your suffering.

Pegasos in Switzerland will take me but im struggling with the application form how to upload documents and no one who loves me will help me and i think im too ill to get there now keep hoping i die naturally with this much anxiety im surprised ive not had heart attack but im not eating either i think i must think i will just go to sleep in bed i want to die at home really tragic i had so much life to live there must be a reason its this bad i cant find anyone World Wide with tinnitus thats ear splitting roaring but add the amplifying its horrific i never thought suffering could exist like this ive had wonderful happy charmed life even the hard bits but this is beyond cruel its robbed me of everything its that bad eating looking nice being well TV Music walking was out on my bike every day borders for Guide Dogs theatre i had so many interests i dont even know cause just woke up with it from nowhere but never thought it could get this loud or cause anxiety like this or loose all my hair but thats how bad its made me thank you for your kindness

Try not to ever think about it. Have background noise on when quiet. I'm ten years in, mostly habituated. Of course everyone's experience is different but once I got the anxiety down it got easier.

I managed at first it was one noise one ear but now its all i can hear it makes my ears vibrate its like jet plane roaring hammering drilling hissing but then every normal sound is deafening but my anxiety is horrendous lost 2 stone nearly all my hair body jerking shaking i think all the anxiety meds have made the tinnitus deafening and caused the hyperacusis and ears dont repair i cant live with this i wish i could my partner has tinnitus he never hears it friends the same why how me deafening roaring i cant tolerate at all now pressure pain and burning both ears but it the noise 24/7 never stops i just cant take the panic in me is the most awful feeling but as time has gone on and louder and louder the more ill i have become i cant mask it with anything due to the hyperacusis if only that would stop i think i could cope i am so very tired im sorry you have it

How did you fail ordering SN?
Im useless with technology i also tried to order N but didnt know how to pay or do the Western Union id be ok paying with credit card or Paypal i think but they dont accept it as payment A doesnt i know

 

[KiraLittleOwl]

It's cruel that those people who love you don't want to help you with Pegasus. Don't they see how much suffering you are going through?

 

[Susan Caswell]

It's cruel that those people who love you don't want to help you with Pegasus. Don't they see how much suffering you are going through?

I know i think they all think i can overcome the tinnitus and live my life as i was and i cant or i would be "normal" level maybe level you can stand i wish i knew cause at least when this came from nowhere i couldnt have been any healthier fitter calmer or happier life was good no hearing loss no infection no wax no loud noise no anxiety or stress of any sort all was good cant believe state im in with tinnitus but i just cant take it ive never heard an external noise like this but in my ears cant get away from it break from it down its not once gone down in 3 years but its very much louder than when it started i am so distraught demented and tired to want to end my life so foreign to me never thought ever have to think of such a thing survived damn cancer and now this how cruel is life just not this nothing but this would have made me this ill i wsnt this ill with cancer and that was 41 years ago i so wish i was messaging its stopped but after 3 years i dont think it will now if i could get it down to level i could stand theres millions of people with it all live ok manage live their lives trust me i cant find anyone World Wide with tinnitus like this to destroy you its the nature of it dementing never stops cant get away from it but its stopped me doing everything the ampifying is that bad if just that would stop x

 

[TheQ22]

So what do you need? Someone to help you fill in the paperwork? Surely you can find someone to help with that if it's just uploading files?

 

[Susan Caswell]

So what do you need? Someone to help you fill in the paperwork? Surely you can find someone to help with that if it's just uploading files?

Yes my application is half done but also no one will take me and you have to have someone identify you after you have passed. A friend said she would but then said she couldnt and hoped this stopped and i didnt have to fo no one around me seems to knows what this is like i can stand a lot but this is way beyond me they have all seen me recover from cancer a big back operation a breast operation and always got well but i could eat well watch TV rest sleep have always slept myself better but cant sleep with this it is as loud as jet plane roaring how can i live a life in this much torture and it is torture just wish wasnt this all wold be just ok and living my lovely calm life dont even know cause

 

[TheQ22]

Yes my application is half done but also no one will take me and you have to have someone identify you after you have passed. A friend said she would but then said she couldnt and hoped this stopped and i didnt have to fo no one around me seems to knows what this is like i can stand a lot but this is way beyond me they have all seen me recover from cancer a big back operation a breast operation and always got well but i could eat well watch TV rest sleep have always slept myself better but cant sleep with this it is as loud as jet plane roaring how can i live a life in this much torture and it is torture just wish wasnt this all wold be just ok and living my lovely calm life dont even know cause

So then really it needs to be someone who knows you?

 

[Susan Caswell]

So then really it needs to be someone who knows you?

I think so or who has met me so someone else could take me or meet me there as long as they could verify it was me even talking about this makes me so ill i just wish never happened all i had to do was stay as i was ive never had stress or anxiety in my life and was very well loved life busy happy its driving me a crazy person but day after day 3 years roaring drilling and i was suicidal with it after few days never thought it could get this loud or me this ill or crippling anxiety but jet plane roaring the hammering i can feel and drilling plus high pitch hissing on top of that everything is so amplified i cant even stand kettle or gas hob or my voice but the anxiety i never knew made you this ill to not eat function bathe sleep wish it would all just stop it would take months to get built back up but i could slowly but cant with ears like this its on every nerve i have tinnitus isnt deafening i know so many people with it none are like this all stand it just annoying me its destroyed physically and mentally i have to find way to peace i cant live in this much torment wish i could if just go down it was nothing like this when it started i coped maybe not had any meds it wold have stayed down or stopped cant go back but wish i could just not come i had so many gorgeous plans just happy with normal life i was such a quiet person but i loved life there was nothing i couldnt do was lucky i knew how lucky but this cruel been good person all my life believed in Karma i cared more for others than myself but i looked after myself too wish someone here could help me x

 

[TheQ22]

I think so or who has met me so someone else could take me or meet me there as long as they could verify it was me even talking about this makes me so ill i just wish never happened all i had to do was stay as i was ive never had stress or anxiety in my life and was very well loved life busy happy its driving me a crazy person but day after day 3 years roaring drilling and i was suicidal with it after few days never thought it could get this loud or me this ill or crippling anxiety but jet plane roaring the hammering i can feel and drilling plus high pitch hissing on top of that everything is so amplified i cant even stand kettle or gas hob or my voice but the anxiety i never knew made you this ill to not eat function bathe sleep wish it would all just stop it would take months to get built back up but i could slowly but cant with ears like this its on every nerve i have tinnitus isnt deafening i know so many people with it none are like this all stand it just annoying me its destroyed physically and mentally i have to find way to peace i cant live in this much torment wish i could if just go down it was nothing like this when it started i coped maybe not had any meds it wold have stayed down or stopped cant go back but wish i could just not come i had so many gorgeous plans just happy with normal life i was such a quiet person but i loved life there was nothing i couldnt do was lucky i knew how lucky but this cruel been good person all my life believed in Karma i cared more for others than myself but i looked after myself too wish someone here could help me x

I don't know what to say. You either need someone to basically go with you? Or help you to find another way?

I think it's not easy to find a solution for you.

 

[Susan Caswell]

I don't know what to say. You either need someone to basically go with you? Or help you to find another way?

I think it's not easy to find a solution for you.

Its not i wish someone could help me go i cant live in this torture i do know 3 years taken terrible toll x

 

[NoDream]

What about an ordinarie hanging?

You just need a rope or something to make a rope of. Like a dog leach, a long scarf or your nightgown belt?
Search for how to do an easy slipknot noose on youtube.

Then you just need something a bit up to tie the rope on. Maybe a branch in a tree, maybe a lamp hook in the ceiling?

Your suffering cant continue as it is now, it hurts just to read about it, cant imagine how it is for you.

 

[Susan Caswell]

What about an ordinarie hanging?

You just need a rope or something to make a rope of. Like a dog leach, a long scarf or your nightgown belt?
Search for how to do an easy slipknot noose on youtube.

Then you just need something a bit up to tie the rope on. Maybe a branch in a tree, maybe a lamp hook in the ceiling?

Your suffering cant continue as it is now, it hurts just to read about it, cant imagine how it is for you.

Thank you for the information i cant say any other its is immense suffering i dont think im strong enough to do this method now i wish i didnt have to do this but i cant see it stopping it would of long ago just dont know how its anything like this ear splitting its horrific. I also never knew so hard to go but never needed to and never thought anything like this could happen to me x

Thank you for the information i cant say any other its is immense suffering i dont think im strong enough to do this method now i wish i didnt have to do this but i cant see it stopping it would of long ago just dont know how its anything like this ear splitting its horrific. I also never knew so hard to go but never needed to and never thought anything like this could happen to me x

Ive tried to suffocate myself this afternoon with a plastic bin bag tried and tried you cant your instincts kick in how tragic is this i had lovely wonderful life been good person ate well lived well looked after so many people my Mum and Dad i dont deserve this been with my partner 40 wonderful years so blessed never an argument ever he has tinnitus but never bothers him he found me in the bedroom with the bag over my head he cried im making us both so ill your right this cant go on im so ill with the anxiety the body jerking is so extreme now as if im being electrocuted but the tinnitus and amplifying dear god help me had such plans it cant end like this if just not come i dont even have a clue cause i know was well really well my ears were perfect hearing perfect i felt super well calm happy loved life just not come all would be good just living normal life like i was cant believe it i just cant wish it would stop need miracle now i sp hoped and prayed it would stop i could have taken any other condition on the planet anything even rather had my cancer again than this least that had operation treatment got well and that was 41 years ago and ive been well ever since until this from nowhere. What brings you here are you male or female im in the UK where are you its ok if ypu dont want to say i understand x

 

[NoDream]

What brings you here are you male or female im in the UK where are you its ok if ypu dont want to say i understand x

Im a female in Sweden. Also have tinnitus, but not as much as you have.

Have you tried using hearing aids for tinnitus? Heard it can mask som of the sounds?

 

[GravityUtilizer]

I think hyperacusis is easier to get past than tinnitus. I think it's linked to OCD. Look up the Four Steps (Schwartz) and/or Exposure and Response Prevention. Also the book 'Living with Tinnitus and Hyperacusis' by McKenna, Baguley and McFerran is pretty good. Basically your obsessing is feeding it all.

So sorry you're going through this though and sorry to make it sound almost simplistic. I know it isn't and I wish I could offer more.

 

[Cherrypea]

Your husband now knows how desperate you are, you may convince him to help you x

 

[Susan Caswell]

I think hyperacusis is easier to get past than tinnitus. I think it's linked to OCD. Look up the Four Steps (Schwartz) and/or Exposure and Response Prevention. Also the book 'Living with Tinnitus and Hyperacusis' by McKenna, Baguley and McFerran is pretty good. Basically your obsessing is feeding it all.

So sorry you're going through this though and sorry to make it sound almost simplistic. I know it isn't and I wish I could offer more.

I cant understand why ive both and both so extreme its horrific i think all the toxic meds for anxiety have caused the hyperacusis its not OCD with me just wish this would stop if only go down to level i can stand at least im not obsessing just cant hear anything but this roaring and its on every nerve i have wish it would stop and let me get well and my life back

Your husband now knows how desperate you are, you may convince him to help you x

Ive tried he thinks i can get past this and be ok and i cant he copes with his never hears it but mine not like that wish with all my heart it was x

 

[TheQ22]

If you've tried to suffocate with a bag you must be desperate, that's I think an awful way to go. Could you do inert gas? Or partial hanging? Or something else?

Of course we'd all rather your tinnitus got better, it sounds like hell on earth.