Reading Reddit's r/suicidebereavement

[ChildrensITV]

I know that words can't express how much pain they feel but it's amazing how calm they seem. Sure, it hurts, but for them to log onto their PC or phone and type out a message shows that they can function somewhat. When I think of me doing the logical and honourable thing and killing myself, I imagine my parents collapsed in a heap of tears and intense bawling, or lying in bed, waking up only to cry and feel pain, and then fall back asleep again, unable to shower or get dressed or eat.

But from reading r/sb, it seems as if, although it is tough and I am sure they have days like I described above, eventually, they live on. It's harsh but they deal with it. I guess my parents will be worse cuz of my own personal situation, including being an only-child.

The thing is, what I described above - lying in bed, unable to shower etc - that is only a few degrees worse than how I am living now. So it's fine if I live like that but not if others do? I just want my parents to die so fucking much so I can send myself into oblivion with SN and we can forget that this sorry fucking mess - me - ever happened.

 

[FuneralCry]

Those who are left behind should just feel relieved that the person can no longer suffer anymore even if they are upset by losing them, the person who ctb wasn't obligated to delay the inevitable for their sake and it would be cruel to expect someone to stay here against their wishes anyway. We all have to die and lose everything someday, grief and loss are just inevitable as long as people continue to selfishly bring life here. But I bet that eventually most of us won't even exist in the memories of those who continue to stay here.

 

[MewtwoIsAlive]

Those who are left behind should just feel relieved that the person can no longer suffer anymore even if they are upset by losing them, the person who ctb wasn't obligated to delay the inevitable for their sake and it would be cruel to expect someone to stay here against their wishes anyway. We all have to die and lose everything someday, grief and loss are just inevitable as long as people continue to selfishly bring life here. But I bet that eventually most of us won't even exist in the memories of those who continue to stay here.

Thats true but I do want to point out that some people kill themselfves because of stupid reasons and foolish desicions. Some can and should be saved in my opinion. Yes they might suffer but some suffer because they dont get support or see the light that would resolve their problem. Some people can avoid ctb, that's my opinion. Thats more kind of a general discussion about suicide.

 

[deathbydragon]

There are some who are selfish twats about it, usually parents (I remember one mother that said her son killing himself "doubled his suffering" and passed it onto her), at the same time there are a lot who say it was just a matter of time and get just as annoyed at the 'every suicide is preventable' messaging as we do.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

No parent, or no good parent, wants to bury their child. If the parent(s) happens to be the one who finds them, that's an image that will be with them for the rest of their lives. Yes, eventually, most people (parents, siblings, friends) find the strength to go on, but they're never the same. Some find ways to make their lives more meaningful, like working to prevent suicide. I'd imagine there's a hole in their psyche that stays with them until they die.

 

[ChildrensITV]

I still feel this way.

 

[WilliamXX]

This is a very interesting resource. Many perspectives and stories.

Healthtalk

Thousands of people have shared their experiences on film to help you understand what it's like to have a health condition such as breast cancer or arthritis.

healthtalk.org