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3FailedAttemptss

3FailedAttemptss

trans girl (`・ω・´)
Jan 22, 2025
350
If i make it out of the psych ward i think ill stop my meds in hopes of crashing to make my ctb easier. i feel like it'll be easy enough- i've already experienced that the hard part is saying goodbye.



what do y'all think of this?
 
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buriedinmyhead

buriedinmyhead

If pain can purify the heart, mine will be pure
Mar 24, 2026
220
I'm certainly in no position to judge since I haven't taken my zoloft in two months
 
Higurashi415

Higurashi415

i'll f*ck me in my own way
Aug 23, 2024
351
I've thought about this too, and also rapidly switching meds without waiting enough time in order to trigger side effects that would make it easier.
So far I've only triggered hypomanic states, which clearly wasn't my intent.

Not sure how to contribute further haha, it's a lottery after all
 
3FailedAttemptss

3FailedAttemptss

trans girl (`・ω・´)
Jan 22, 2025
350
I take:
  • Lithium 750mg
  • Olanzapine 2.5mg
  • Melatonin 4mg
  • Estradiol 5mg
  • Cyproterone Acetate 25mg, every 3rd day
  • Aripiprazol 30mg
  • Lamotrigin 25mg
  • D3-vitamin 50mcg
  • B12 1mg
  • B9 5mg
PN as needed: Lorazepam 2mg and Olanzapin 5mg.

I'd imagine stopping my Lithium, Olanzapine, Aripiprazol and Lamotrigin would make me crash. I would not stop my HRT meds, just out of principle :3
 
meowpuppy

meowpuppy

valerie | she/they | puppygirl
Jul 11, 2026
382
don't you think it's a possibility you'll be too mentally distraught after stopping the medication to set everything up? i feel like this is based on an understanding that more suffering = easier suicide, when i'm pretty sure it's not that simple. lots of people kill themselves on days they're happy because they get the energy to go through with it. do you think you'll lack energy?
 
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heal

heal

Member
Jul 10, 2026
9
Hey @3FailedAttemptss, I've been lurking this forum without an account for a little over half a year now and have been keeping up with your posts whenever I happened to catch them in the main feed. I recently gathered the courage to make an account and want to finally express to you some of the thoughts that have been present to me now that I can.

I want you to know you have been in my thoughts for a while now and am wishing you well. I have always been glad to see your posts and would often wonder how you are doing in the lapses between them. During those times, I would worry that you were already gone and that I missed all the chances I had to express the care I feel. Among the things I have been wanting to do before my time comes was to reach out to you at least once and let you know your pain does not go unheard. My eyes are welling up as I write this post because I recently survived a major attempt myself and didn't think I would get the opportunity to express any of these things.

I am sincerely sorry you have been suffering so much. Our experiences are not entirely similar, but I want you to know that it has offered me some comfort to feel that I am not so fully alone in my suffering through reading your posts. Although we have never spoken and I am entirely a stranger to you, I have often wished that I could take away the things causing you pain and offer some remedy to your life. For both our sakes, you have been in my thoughts as I wish for a better world.

As always, I am wishing for your well-being and sending you care.
 
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3FailedAttemptss

3FailedAttemptss

trans girl (`・ω・´)
Jan 22, 2025
350
Hey @3FailedAttemptss, I've been lurking this forum without an account for a little over half a year now and have been keeping up with your posts whenever I happened to catch them in the main feed. I recently gathered the courage to make an account and want to finally express to you some of the thoughts that have been present to me now that I can.

I want you to know you have been in my thoughts for a while now and am wishing you well. I have always been glad to see your posts and would often wonder how you are doing in the lapses between them. During those times, I would worry that you were already gone and that I missed all the chances I had to express the care I feel. Among the things I have been wanting to do before my time comes was to reach out to you at least once and let you know your pain does not go unheard. My eyes are welling up as I write this post because I recently survived a major attempt myself and didn't think I would get the opportunity to express any of these things.

I am sincerely sorry you have been suffering so much. Our experiences are not entirely similar, but I want you to know that it has offered me some comfort to feel that I am not so fully alone in my suffering through reading your posts. Although we have never spoken and I am entirely a stranger to you, I have often wished that I could take away the things causing you pain and offer some remedy to your life. For both our sakes, you have been in my thoughts as I wish for a better world.

As always, I am wishing for your well-being and sending you care.
thank you so much for writing this QwQ i honestly don't really know what to say other than that your message means a lot to me.

i'm really sorry you've been suffering too TwT and i'm really glad you're still here, and that you were able to write this. it sounds like you've been carrying so much for such a long time

it's honestly kind of surreal to think someone i've never even spoken to has been thinking about me for all these months. i'm really touched that you worked up the courage to make an account just to send me this. thank you for letting me know i wasn't just shouting into the void ^^

i really hope things become gentler for you too. you deserve that just as much as anyone else :3

thank you again for reaching out. please take good care of yourself, okay?
 
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