I've always been an over thinker, I realized that my over thinking was causing me to be stuck. I am not generally an emotional person, but back in the early 90s, I would see a stupid telephone commercial and I would start crying. I hated the indecisiveness in me at that time. I would stand in front of the open refrigerator knowing that I needed to eat (I'm diabetic so I need to eat to regulate my blood sugar levels (BSL), or my BSL might drop too low and then I'd end up in the hospital... But I just couldn't make up my mind about what to eat, and I would have no energy to bother to cook anything either. I ate a lot of cereal during the early 90s. So I'd lie in bed and not eat and I'd get sick.
I've been on Effexor since 1993, it has helped AFTER trying a few other drugs that had negative sexual side effects (my equipment just wouldn't work). Am I happy and not depressed now? No. The pills do not make me happy, they make it so that the emotional lows don't cause me to feel so low that I want to CTB every other day. Now, I only want to CTB, every couple of months... so is that progress?