Of course I wish for N, but it is not a possibility for me. I do envy those with the option of it though. It is unfair how people have to do research online to get a peaceful death. It all sounds so complicated and people are already suffering enough without having to do all this extensive research and planning. I hope that you find what you are looking for. I know that for many it can be a comfort just having the option of a peaceful exit, not feeling as though they are trapped in this life with no way out.
I think many people choose N as it is the most peaceful and reliable method - similar to dying in ones sleep. I am also envious of people who already have N, I really hope my purchase is successful. I agree that it is unfair for people to have to do extensive research about how to leave this world peacefully, it really should be a fundamental human right. It was (and still is) extremely stressful to carry out this task, on top of the circumstances that make me want to die. I am about to spend my life savings on it and still might not receive the product since it is illegal.
You don't have to answer this but - why it is not a possibility for you? Are finances a problem?
Update: waiting for D to give me the go ahead to pay, but I think his country is still asleep.
Update: I have received the confirmation that I can pay and re-checked the Bitcoin address many times. I made payment now. I have asked D to let me know when they receive payment.