"SOME" people
I wish I could challenge any pro lifer to spend an hour in my head. No one can possibly experience the suicidal mind if they haven't experienced it.
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I wish I could challenge any pro lifer to spend an hour in my head. No one can possibly experience the suicidal mind if they haven't experienced it.
it has the opposite effect ... you have blood on your hands
兎の耳
The ghost of a girl who never lived.
- Aug 3, 2023
- 133
My heart hurts for everyone on this forum. All of us are lost souls in one way or another, and I would genuinely love for each and every person here to find happiness in this life.
Having said that, saying recovery is possible for most of us is a bit naïve in my opinion. I certainly appreciate the optimism, and I do believe a few people here might be edging more towards "pro death" instead of "pro choice", but you have to understand that for a lot of us, this is the last stop on a long journey downward. The world has hurt us, and while recovery might be possible it's a long climb out of a dark hole that many of us don't have the strength or desire to make. That's not even touching on the people I've encountered here that have endured so much hurt that my mind struggles to comprehend it. The world can be beautiful, but it can also be ugly and cruel, and the choice to end one's journey should be respected.
There's a time and a place for optimism, but that place is not here. This is a place for the lost to find understanding and solace and a path to peace, whatever form that might take.
Having said that, saying recovery is possible for most of us is a bit naïve in my opinion. I certainly appreciate the optimism, and I do believe a few people here might be edging more towards "pro death" instead of "pro choice", but you have to understand that for a lot of us, this is the last stop on a long journey downward. The world has hurt us, and while recovery might be possible it's a long climb out of a dark hole that many of us don't have the strength or desire to make. That's not even touching on the people I've encountered here that have endured so much hurt that my mind struggles to comprehend it. The world can be beautiful, but it can also be ugly and cruel, and the choice to end one's journey should be respected.
There's a time and a place for optimism, but that place is not here. This is a place for the lost to find understanding and solace and a path to peace, whatever form that might take.
Recover? If by recover you mean a lifetime of taking meds to stop the bad feeling, numbing us to the point where it alters our brain, having to switch pills every couple of years cuz the same pills may not work forever. Such a quality life. Mental illness is not like a physical illness. So you get better in the next 5 years, what's to stop one life event from spiraling you back out of control all over again? What if you can't recover without meds? Is that still recovering? It's not like it's all caused by trauma, some people brain are wired differently then what? Sometimes it's a combination of both things.
Kundalini Guy
FULLY RECOVERED
- Mar 27, 2023
- 516
Spend an hour in a schizophrenics mind and tell me how it goes. And I don't mean it in a bad way, I am suffering heavily too.
What are the necessary steps? I believe sometimes it is too late, it's like a physical illness in the sense that the longer someone waits, the harder it becomes to really prevents it. At some point, everything just becomes background noise and you're not really living, you're existing. Counting the days away until you're dead.
Kundalini Guy
FULLY RECOVERED
- Mar 27, 2023
- 516
I don't mind because I can handle a lot of trouble and pain.
You need to find the root cause of your problems and trauma/mental illness. Get rid of that shit like your life depends on it (literally). I don't know how to answer this question properly because today I learned peoples problems are more complex and deep so my message will not help everyone. For some I agree it's impossible to recover from what they are going through but a lot of them can.
It's not as simple as getting rid of it. Most people have trauma and getting rid of it is not the answer. It's healing and in order to heal, you have to feel it. And years of pain hurts like hell when you start to reflect and working on them. Some of us with mental health also have some bad coping mechanism to escape from our pain. It's complicated (like you said) than just getting rid of it which I think is unhealthy. Healing is what helps people but most people don't heal. They just find someone else to put their baggage on and traumatize basically. It's confusing that we say we can recover but the only options are therapy and medications. And therapy kind of sucks for most of us we end up triggered more. Don't even get me started on medications.
@siniy_cat
Member
- Nov 19, 2023
- 36
I don't even have anything against positive posts in general, but I have read a couple of your posts already and they seem like the same shallow advice and life-affirming platitudes you hear everywhere else on the internet.
fiftyfiftyclown
Member
- Jun 30, 2023
- 30
i agree with most of this tbh for many people, life is truly not worth living. but what is your deal? you just post this teen angsty stuff all day, but you've been doing it for years...is there something beyond the ordinary circumstances (like, peaceful methods such as N being near impossible to get for ordinary people) preventing you from ctb ?? i personally appreciate this forum's existence, but users like this give credence to pro-lifers who say that this site encourages impressionable people to kill themselves.
if i ran this site, i'd limit the amount of navel gazing posts under suicide discussion. should be for informative threads on methods or actual goodbye posts.
why are we debating whether or not life is worth living on a suicide forum? i thought we were all more or less in agreement that people have their reasons for wanting out and it's frustrating that well-meaning normies just give advice like "it gets better" (and that they have made most peaceful methods inaccessible). But it's not hard to see why 'pro-lifers' want to prevent their friends or family from dying. we're human after all. i mean we are animals and we are naturally wired to want to survive, and unless you're a total psycho, we are also wired to grieve the loss of others. i plan on CTB but it's not like i'd want people i care about to do the same. i am not a 'pro-lifer' but making thousands of posts for years on end, essentially saying 'anyone who is suffering is better off committing suicide' is weird. you know suicide is more complicated than that, you know most people have responsibilities/obligations/other considerations, otherwise why are you still here?
like...you are a grown adult and find "life is suffering" to be a profound topic to rehash every day?
if i ran this site, i'd limit the amount of navel gazing posts under suicide discussion. should be for informative threads on methods or actual goodbye posts.
why are we debating whether or not life is worth living on a suicide forum? i thought we were all more or less in agreement that people have their reasons for wanting out and it's frustrating that well-meaning normies just give advice like "it gets better" (and that they have made most peaceful methods inaccessible). But it's not hard to see why 'pro-lifers' want to prevent their friends or family from dying. we're human after all. i mean we are animals and we are naturally wired to want to survive, and unless you're a total psycho, we are also wired to grieve the loss of others. i plan on CTB but it's not like i'd want people i care about to do the same. i am not a 'pro-lifer' but making thousands of posts for years on end, essentially saying 'anyone who is suffering is better off committing suicide' is weird. you know suicide is more complicated than that, you know most people have responsibilities/obligations/other considerations, otherwise why are you still here?
like...you are a grown adult and find "life is suffering" to be a profound topic to rehash every day?
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This isn't a mental health competition, frankly I'm rapidly starting to give zero fucks what goes on in your head apart from spamming threads.
You're too anti-choice, anti suicide, pro life, whatever for this thread.
Please remember this is a pro choice forum where suicidal people feel comfortable conversing.
You'll fit in better on the recovery board.
Dot
Info abt typng styl on prfle.
- Sep 26, 2021
- 2,841
Apolgis tht ths = lng - am awre tht = dffclt t/ read
Ok lk
Thre = reasn Y ppl wh/ wnt2 join SaSu jst 't/ hlp ppl' r rejectd durng registratn
& slf am sayng ths as a persn wh/ = workng incrdbly hrd t/ buld up sme propr comprhnsve recvry rsourcs t/ gve as mny ppl chnces @ recvry as pssble
No1 mnds gnuine postvty - a gd xample of a postve postr = @whywere - thy oftn pst postve & Ncourgng msgs t/ ppl & shw thm tht thy mattr & r valud
Wht ppl d/ nt rspond wll 2 = b-ing tld tht thy cn recovr & havng recvry pushd on thm b/ sme1 wh/ knws nothng abt thr stuatn - anothr persn wld nt accpt slf issus recntly & thn whn slf xplaind tht recvry = nt an optn thy bcme condescndng & patrnisng bcse apprntly thy knw bettr -- tht xpernce ws gnuinly dstressng & if n.ethng mde slf suicdalty mch wrse
Thre = nothng wrng wth offrng t/ listn t/ ppl -- slf oftn usd t/ msg ppl in d.ms & tll thm tht slf knw of altern8tve thrpis if thy wre intrestd & wantd t/ knw mre -- ppl wre oftn gr8tfl & receptve bcse slf ws respctng thm whre thy wre & respctng thr chce t/ tke info or rfuse
Am sre tht wht u hve bn thru ws horrifc & slf d/ nt doubt tht fr secnd - bt am also gttng impressn tht bcse u survivd wht u thght ws th/ wrse thng pssble thn evry1 els cn -- ppl d/ nt join SaSu bcse thy wnt t/ b tld xyz -- ppl join SaSu bcse thy wn2 b listnd 2 bcse tht ds nt happn n.ewhre els fr mst ppl
Ppl r tryn2 tll u ths in mny diffrnt wys bt stll u r sayng tht u wll pst 'postivty' on suicde dscussn threds & tll ppl tht thy cn recovr whn all thy wnt = 2 t/ b herd
Mst ppl d/ nt wnt postvty - thy wnt empthy
Offr ppl spport if tht = wht u wn2 d/ bt pls d/ nt tlk @ ppl as tho u knw mre abt thr lves thn thy d/ -- givng 'postvty' jst mkes mny ppl fl as tho thy r b-ing talkd ovr & wht thy r sayng = fallng on def ears & thse feelngs of isolatn invaldatn & failre jst cntinu
Thse r th/ xperncs tht ppl join sasu t/ avd
Kundalini Guy
FULLY RECOVERED
- Mar 27, 2023
- 516
I understand, maybe am shoving positivity at them? I really viewed it as a person who just recently thought there was absolutely zero hope but recovered they could do it too. But as the users said, I don't know them and it's complex. This is probably one of my last posts in suicide section, I plan to go lowkey and just post on recovery and off-topic. I tried to make them positive but it their bodies, their choice then.
アホペンギン
…
- Jul 10, 2023
- 2,199
Translated version, to avoid any misunderstandings and to make it an easier read:
Apologies that this might be challenging to read. I am aware that it's difficult to understand.
Okay, look,
There's a reason why people who want to join SaSu just to "help people" are rejected during registration.
And I say this as a person who is working incredibly hard to build up some proper comprehensive recovery resources to give as many people chances at recovery as possible.
No one minds genuine positivity - a good example of a positive poster is @whywere - they often post positive and encouraging messages to people and show them that they matter and are valued.
What people do not respond well to is being told that they can recover and having recovery pushed on them by someone who knows nothing about their situation. Another person would not accept self-issues recently, and then when self explained that recovery is not an option, they became condescending and patronizing. That experience was genuinely distressing, and if anything made self-suicidality much worse.
There's nothing wrong with offering to listen to people. Self often used to message people in DMs and tell them that self knows of alternative therapies if they were interested and wanted to know more. People were often grateful and receptive because self was respecting them where they were and respecting their choice to take information or refuse.
I am sure what you have been through was horrific, and self does not doubt that for a second. But I am also getting the impression that because you survived what you thought was the worst thing possible, everyone else can too. People do not join SaSu because they want to be told XYZ; people join SaSu because they want to be listened to because that does not happen anywhere else for most people.
People are trying to tell you this in many different ways, but still, you are saying that you will post 'positivity' on suicide discussion threads and tell people that they can recover when all they want is to be heard.
Most people do not want positivity - they want empathy.
Offer people support if that is what you want to do, but please do not talk at people as though you know more about their lives than they do. Giving 'positivity' just makes many people feel as though they are being talked over, and what they are saying is falling on deaf ears, and these feelings of isolation, invalidation, and failure just continue.
These are the experiences that people join SaSu to avoid.
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You have any idea how patronising you sound ? We're all either defensive or aggressive according to you, have you ever even given one minute's thought to how you, a total stranger with the solution to others' life problems, present to us ?
How about taking a couple of days to consider just how unwelcome and intrusive your views are presented before sounding off in the future.
アホペンギン
…
- Jul 10, 2023
- 2,199
I can't recover, all chances of possible recovery are gone. My physical health is worsening, my mental health is the same and it is arguably already terrible, no medication prescribed to me has had any significant positive effect on me, not even antiemetics.
sooner or later, even if I do happen to recover which I definitely can't do by myself, I'd ctb anyways for the aforementioned reasons.
Dot
Info abt typng styl on prfle.
- Sep 26, 2021
- 2,841
In a wrd - ys
Crrct - if u wantd t/ sty on th/ frum as an xample of sme1 wh/ hs recovrd & cntinu postng in recvry thn sme usrs cld b inspird b/ ur stry - = bettr fr othr ppl 2 C ur xample of hpe thn tellng othr ppl wht = wrng fr thm
Precsly - ppl nd t/ mke thr own choics- if thy chse t/ recvr thy cn alwys cme t/ th/ recvry sectn -- fr sme ppl wh/ chnge thr mnd abt ctb = oftn bcse othrs hve undrstd thm & stoppd thm feelng s/ isol8td - & thy cn only d/ tht b/ havng thr vulnrabltis & emotns recognsd & respctd
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Dot
Info abt typng styl on prfle.
- Sep 26, 2021
- 2,841
アホペンギン
…
- Jul 10, 2023
- 2,199
Everyone has bodily autonomy and they can decide what they do for themselves. Just like making the decision to ctb, people can decide whether or not recovery would be a feasible option for them and whether or not they want to pursue this. Regardless of their choices or outlook on their situation, their decisions should be respected and any uncalled for advice which is subject to be misinterpreted as patronization should be avoided.
Nephis
“Death should take me while I am in the mood.”
- Sep 3, 2018
- 280
Positivity and empathy...
They are not the same, you can offer empathy to people which can make them feel more hopeful every day you offer it.
I always try to offer people my empathy, but giving them that hope and kindness does not mean belittling their problems,
it means offering them some hope, an open ear, a friendly smile, and a friend.
Me myself will not die because I am depressed, not because my body fails me, but for reasons completely out of my control.
The little legacy I leave here will be a little hope that I leave for every single person.
That being said, do not encourage, guide those who come here to their own choice, this means letting them come to their
conclusions. That's what this site is about, the ability of choice made for yourself not the encouragement of either or.
Please remember what SASU was meant for.
They are not the same, you can offer empathy to people which can make them feel more hopeful every day you offer it.
I always try to offer people my empathy, but giving them that hope and kindness does not mean belittling their problems,
it means offering them some hope, an open ear, a friendly smile, and a friend.
Me myself will not die because I am depressed, not because my body fails me, but for reasons completely out of my control.
The little legacy I leave here will be a little hope that I leave for every single person.
That being said, do not encourage, guide those who come here to their own choice, this means letting them come to their
conclusions. That's what this site is about, the ability of choice made for yourself not the encouragement of either or.
Please remember what SASU was meant for.
sanction
sanctioned
- Mar 15, 2019
- 429
Basic formula for life to be worth living, despite guaranteed death in the end:
- good health
- reasonable childhood upbringing, which sets your foundation and outlook of life
- more than enough money (not just survival mode)
- have great relationships / supportive system
- reasonable living environment (e.g. first world country vs third world)
And as a bonus, if you're born physically attractive, which naturally raises your qualify of life experiences
Unfortunately, many people simply aren't lucky enough to have these things. So instead see the daily efforts of surviving simply not worth the hassle, since we're going to die in the end anyways. Mind as well just cut it short, to save the unnecessary headaches
Pro-lifers are the ones that are lucky, or able to be on the better side of life. Since they never experienced the worst side, they're simply not able to fully understand it, so instead misunderstand people that rather leave this world sooner, as having mental problems
Its a never ending battle
- good health
- reasonable childhood upbringing, which sets your foundation and outlook of life
- more than enough money (not just survival mode)
- have great relationships / supportive system
- reasonable living environment (e.g. first world country vs third world)
And as a bonus, if you're born physically attractive, which naturally raises your qualify of life experiences
Unfortunately, many people simply aren't lucky enough to have these things. So instead see the daily efforts of surviving simply not worth the hassle, since we're going to die in the end anyways. Mind as well just cut it short, to save the unnecessary headaches
Pro-lifers are the ones that are lucky, or able to be on the better side of life. Since they never experienced the worst side, they're simply not able to fully understand it, so instead misunderstand people that rather leave this world sooner, as having mental problems
Its a never ending battle
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Morte
Specialist
- Nov 23, 2023
- 356
everyone I know online and in person who are depressed has never recovered. I think it's exactly the opposite, therapy and medication only work for people who are not really depressed and are just going through a low point in their life. People who have actually been dealing with depression for a long time usually get worse, which makes sense, as we get older and other problems add up. Medications are nothing more than temporary inhibitors.
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WAITING TO DIE
TORMENTED
- Sep 30, 2023
- 1,539
I began suffering from clinical depression aged 7.
I'm now 42 and still clinically depressed.
I've tried every med and every form of therapy available to me yet I'm still chronically depressed.
I was diagnosed with persistent untreatable depression over 15 years ago.
It never got better, and turned into Anhedonia almost a decade ago.
Meds actually did me more harm than good as they caused me to have pssd.
This is absolutely true in my own personal experience.
CuriosityAndCat
Nothing is true. Everything is permitted.
- Nov 2, 2023
- 311
What's a satisfying amount too you?
You've survived anhedonia for a decade? I didn't know it was possible to survive anhedonia for that long. Looking for a medication is way worse than the symptoms being trated.
Have you had a chance to try esketamine (Spravato)?
It's safer and got FDA approval past couple years. I've been using it. Hardly any side effects other than getting really high for a few hours, and it's for treating depression that's resistant to treatment with typical drugs.
Personal experience w/ TDCS. Use sponge, and stay away from gel electrode. DIY is super cheap. Basically just a kitchen sponge, alligator clips, salt water, voltage regulator, and a 9v battery. Also a timer.
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Absolute minimum 4-5k USD (or EUR) net (!!) if being in an employment. For context: This amount also takes into account inflation over the last 3 decades and would reflect an almost equal income today like when I started working back then (started with my own business).
Unfortunately I don't have a wage-slave history and no current skills. Min-Wage ... no thanks. That's not a life for me.
@FuneralCry I'm sorry your thread got so much derailed.
WAITING TO DIE
TORMENTED
- Sep 30, 2023
- 1,539
There are others here who have been anhedonic for long periods of time.
I guess we have just adapted to being in this state, or we are too strong for our own good.
CuriosityAndCat
Nothing is true. Everything is permitted.
- Nov 2, 2023
- 311
I've been depressed since I was 9 and I've experienced being anhedonic for periods lasting months. I hope something brings you guys back. Esketamine is the first illegal drug and got approved this year. It's worked well for me. My body couldn't tolerate anything except desvenlafaxine even at lowest doses. My dysthymia and depression are gone. It's not been a long time, but I'm really hoping they stay gone.
Rhizomorph1
May you find peace in living or dying
- Oct 24, 2023
- 599
Statistically speaking most people who develop suicidal ideation lose it within a small number of years (if they live long enough)
Statistically speaking most people with a mental disorder will benefit from treatment and/or medication to a point where they appraise life as worth living and having quality of life.
I'm not one of those people but the dominant rhetoric on this forum that the majority of all people are helpless and life is not worth living is simply not true.
I think we all seek to benefit by recognizing that those who are not able to recover are a minority that just happens to be overrepresented on this forum.
The cynicism is understandable given what we're all going through, but may represent a barrier to some folks who could recover from being influenced optimistically to try treatment that could be life saving for them, even if it is not for ourselves. There is a real cultural risk of this influence.
Let's not throw the baby out with the bathwater just cause our experience is shit. Most people are happy and most people that aren't can recover. It's a select few who are the exceptions to these statistical trends and it's worth seriously evaluating/introspecting on whether we are truly one of the very rare few who are unrecoverable. This is life and death after all; it's worth taking seriously whatever decision one makes.
Be sure to get psychotherapy alongside the ketamine. Research shows that therapy stabilizes the neuroplastic effects And benefits of ketamine which can otherwise wear off within a short time.
Source: I studied and researched psychedelic-assisted therapy prior to my chronic illness progressing
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CuriosityAndCat
Nothing is true. Everything is permitted.
- Nov 2, 2023
- 311
I am and aware. I'm doing all the things except neurofeedback atm. Meditation, working out, balance based exercises, eating ice cream twice daily (jk), etc.
Rhizomorph1
May you find peace in living or dying
- Oct 24, 2023
- 599
I'm eating ice cream twice daily and I'm not joking lol
I've let myself go a bit ever since I've made peace with dying
Working out is a big one if you don't have any illnesses/etc. that are barriers to doing so, such as myself
I want so bad to be back at the gym
