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leavingsoonx

leavingsoonx

Headed to the other side
Sep 22, 2024
118
No mail delivered and obviously with something on the way and a messy brain, I have more time at least to think about seriously CTB. I was going to throw the package out and now I don't know. I'm impulsive and if I keep it I know I'll use it. I can't decide what I want yet but I have a strong belief that committing suicide means you won't end up in hell after struggling with Jesus and God and thinking they are wrathful and angry at me. I'm so mentally ill I can't see my life being worth living.

waiting to see what am I gonna do is annoying and now I have no idea when I'll be surprised with something that can finally let me be at peace
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Unleashtherain, Praestat_Mori, LoiteringClouds and 1 other person
SVEN

SVEN

I Wish I'd Been a Jester Too.
Apr 3, 2023
2,802
All I can suggest is seeing if it's possible for you to store your package, when it arrives, somewhere not too close to you. So that you won't use it impulsively. With obtaining this product becoming more and more challenging it could be heartbreaking to have some, dispose of it and then bitterly regret your action in the future.
Best wishes in working things out.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Praestat_Mori and NearlyIrrelevantCake
leavingsoonx

leavingsoonx

Headed to the other side
Sep 22, 2024
118
All I can suggest is seeing if it's possible for you to store your package, when it arrives, somewhere not too close to you. So that you won't use it impulsively. With obtaining this product becoming more and more challenging it could be heartbreaking to have some, dispose of it and then bitterly regret your action in the future.
Best wishes in working things out.
Thank you, thinking of it that ways makes me realize I can't throw it out. This also means I'll be definitely CTB. If I keep it, there's no turning back. I feel suicidal so much that in no time I'll use it. Feeling more at peace and less anxious over dying
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: SVEN
Amarajoy

Amarajoy

Specialist
Sep 12, 2024
390
All I can suggest is seeing if it's possible for you to store your package, when it arrives, somewhere not too close to you. So that you won't use it impulsively. With obtaining this product becoming more and more challenging it could be heartbreaking to have some, dispose of it and then bitterly regret your action in the future.
Best wishes in working things out.
This is why I haven't ordered yet. Afraid of impulsive action yet also afraid I will miss out on being able to get it.
 
  • Aww..
Reactions: SVEN

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