poll - have you ever dreamed of yourself?

[StruggleWithin]

First, I rarely dream or remember dreaming. Which is why for me sleeping is a way to escape from my reality. But I will comment on the few instances that I remember dreaming.

When I was a child I had a dream of a teenager or adult type body doing a naked run through a room. I thought this was a real memory of my brother. Years later commented/asked him about it and he had no recollection of that. It was in that moment that I realized it was a dream and not a memory and that the person in the dream was my future self.

And in other dreams that I had throughout my life but more frequently after my repressed memories came back and before "I came out" I had many dreams of being a woman. Almost always they were the same female image.

"The Matrix cannot tell you who you are." Such a relatable and great allegory (The Matrix movie collection) for the transgender experience (of the writer).

But not always the same image, so it's possible I just didn't recognize myself. Like I said, I don't dream typically. And I no longer feel the need to escape my life, so I am not in bed more than I need to be to rest.

 

[aSilentVoice]

this is very strange to me - to live your life remembering only a 3rd perspective - extremely odd; in fact it is so strange that i can't even fathom this view in my wildest imagination - i love it !

absolutely fascinating - your subconscious mind is talking to you, and we have no idea what it's saying (very sad too…); obviously about your longings and your desires, but more importantly - your idealization might be contributing, or generating, some depression on some level?

i don't know about this, but i want to guess that our minds are using our dreams (and nightmares) as ways to find coping mechanisms for our recent experiences - both good or bad

I struggle with self-loathing sometimes. Maybe a bit of dissociation is why my memories are generally in 3rd person. And in some ways, I don't feel like an adult despite being 28. I just thought I would know / have accomplished more by now. Could be why I'm younger in dreams?

I think you hit the nail on the head. Thank you for giving me some insight! You could be a therapist.

For those 2 recurring dreams, I think they're tied to some of my past and present fears. As a kid, I was really afraid of burning alive. I'm not not afraid of it now, I think it would be one of the worst ways to die, but I've come to the conclusion that it would be better to jump out the window if that was the only other option. For the ideation dreams, I think it's tied to my fear that I'll always be depressed. That periods of reprieve will never last. I sometimes feel like I'm afraid to be happy or successful or deeply trust for fear of the pain of loss.

Thank you for your thoughtful responses @ksp!

 

[trist]

i thought everyone saw themself in either 1st or 3rd person while dreaming because i experience both

 

[ksp]

Mine are never set in this world/reality

mine are always based in reality, mixed with some weird twists - i'm still boring and unimaginative

(otherwise they would be nightmares)

not only our reality has the potential to cause us great suffering, but our nightmares can be 'delightful' as well

therefore I rarely have any recollection of it while being asleep. I do, however, often have false memories, especially while playing a character.

i'm very glad i don't remember mine !
but the 'false memories' sound very intriguing

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… It was in that moment that I realized it was a dream and not a memory and that the person in the dream was my future self

a completely new aspect that i never considered in a dream - the future!

why are all of you in this thread, so intersecting and fascinating, and i'm so shit ?!?
(i finally got excited about being abnormal and i'm getting depressed again )

"The Matrix cannot tell you who you are." Such a relatable and great allegory (The Matrix movie collection) for the transgender experience (of the writer).

agree with this - very original idea, and well executed!

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I struggle with self-loathing sometimes. Maybe a bit of dissociation is why my memories are generally in 3rd person. And in some ways, I don't feel like an adult despite being 28. I just thought I would know / have accomplished more by now. Could be why I'm younger in dreams?

you're touching a lot of different aspects (i love the dissociation take!), i just don't think that we should add our self-disappointments to the mix - i choose to ignore mine, tolerate them as much as i can, and if not, i'll outright live in denial

I think you hit the nail on the head. Thank you for giving me some insight! You could be a therapist.

thank you :) but obviously you're not paying attention: i'm shit

For those 2 recurring dreams, I think they're tied to some of my past and present fears. As a kid, I was really afraid of burning alive. I'm not not afraid of it now, I think it would be one of the worst ways to die, but I've come to the conclusion that it would be better to jump out the window if that was the only other option.

primal fear - we i will never be able to overcome the most basic instinct of all: survival
as a fully grown adult i would never consider immolation, or jumping (unless my door was in fire and i wouldn't have any other option)

For the ideation dreams, I think it's tied to my fear that I'll always be depressed. That periods of reprieve will never last. I sometimes feel like I'm afraid to be happy or successful or deeply trust for fear of the pain of loss.

absolutely brilliant insight and introspection !!

most of the people on this site would be very bright scientists! too bad society doesn't encourage intelligence more…

Thank you for your thoughtful responses @ksp!

no - thank YOU @aSilentVoice :)

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i thought everyone saw themself in either 1st or 3rd person while dreaming because i experience both

another lucky one :)

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this thread was a genuine and unexpected wonder to me !

 

[aSilentVoice]

you're touching a lot of different aspects (i love the dissociation take!), i just don't think that we should add our self-disappointments to the mix - i choose to ignore mine, tolerate them as much as i can, and if not, i'll outright live in denial

thank you :) but obviously you're not paying attention: i'm shit

primal fear - we i will never be able to overcome the most basic instinct of all: survival
as a fully grown adult i would never consider immolation, or jumping (unless my door was in fire and i wouldn't have any other option)

absolutely brilliant insight and introspection !!

most of the people on this site would be very bright scientists! too bad society doesn't encourage intelligence more…

Yeah... I'm working on not being as much of perfectionist as I used to be. I can't change the past so focusing on the present would be better, but easier said than done unfortunately.

Nah, you're awesome! I like your posts. They're always interesting to read and think about.

Oh, I would never consider self-immolation either! I have considered jumping in the past though.

Thank you and back at ya!

 

[NaturalBornNEET]

in one of my most recent dreams I had reincarnated into another person and I saw an apparition of my real self standing next to the me in a new body, in a large percentage of my dreams I'm another person or a disembodied viewer looking at things from alternating perspectives

 

[jamie_]

occasionally in a third person type of way. usually in some sort of social nightmare scenario.

 

[Skathon]

mine are always based in reality, mixed with some weird twists - i'm still boring and unimaginative

Not a solo RPG player or an avid fan of any characters, are you? You simply have to have no life of your own to dream of. Easy.

not only our reality has the potential to cause us great suffering, but our nightmares can be 'delightful' as well

None of my dreams have ever been as horrifying as this reality: that's how I am able to tell whether I'm awake or not. I awake into a nightmare.
I would swap it with absolutely any of my most disturbing dreams if I could. The worlds I dream of are all magical and, therefore, have at least some potential.

but the 'false memories' sound very intriguing

The... system(?) that allows one to remember/have memories is the same one that creates dreams. Obviously, it can also create the former inside the latter.
Mine is absolutely magnificent, by the way. It doesn't deserve to die with me...

 

[ksp]

in one of my most recent dreams I had reincarnated into another person and I saw an apparition of my real self standing next to the me in a new body, in a large percentage of my dreams I'm another person or a disembodied viewer looking at things from alternating perspectives

it seems to be quite clear that you crave a completely different appearance, and you might be obsessing about your physical inadequacies? if so, i wish i could help you overcome some of them (or at least the minor ones - i completely ignore mine, but my life is over so - no big deal :)

anyway, another new perspective to me - thanks!

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occasionally in a third person type of way. usually in some sort of social nightmare scenario.

very interesting combination!

i see you have A LOT of other severe issues, from your signature - i'm sorry for what you must endure..
but to focus on the aspect of - "It brought back anxiety (that I have) to its max" - associated with some of your dreams: i hope you don't encounter these scenarios too often

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Not a solo RPG player or an avid fan of any characters, are you? You simply have to have no life of your own to dream of. Easy.

thank you !

None of my dreams have ever been as horrifying as this reality: that's how I am able to tell whether I'm awake or not. I awake into a nightmare.

i really like the way you expressed the idea - very powerful! (your disgust is palpable)

I would swap it with absolutely any of my most disturbing dreams if I could. The worlds I dream of are all magical and, therefore, have at least some potential.

i'm glad you get some breaks from reality - it can be extremely painful for many people here…

The... system(?) that allows one to remember/have memories is the same one that creates dreams. Obviously, it can also create the former inside the latter.
Mine is absolutely magnificent, by the way. It doesn't deserve to die with me...

awesome!! great way to explain it; it must be quite intense - i wonder if you would find it helpful to express it outwards (through paintings, or writing, or whatever else - not sure if this would be appealing to you)

 

[jamie_]

"It brought back anxiety (that I have) to its max" - associated with some of your dreams: i hope you don't encounter these scenarios too often

Hit the nail on the head I'm afraid. I seem to get bad dreams when I sleep through a genuine need to sleep (i.e. I've been awake for some time) as opposed to sleeping because of depression or passing out via staring at a screen/drink – in the latter scenario I don't tend to have many dreams.

 

[Skathon]

thank you !

No problem! Not that I would recommend following any of my recommendations...

i really like the way you expressed the idea - very powerful! (your disgust is palpable)

Thank you! I'm usually unable to describe how far into the depth of the infinite abyss of my hatred it reaches...
It reminds me of the quote in my profile (in the "about" section).

i'm glad you get some breaks from reality - it can be extremely painful for many people here…

Indeed; however... I would rather have nightmares than awake into one that can only be dispelled in one way.

awesome!! great way to explain it; it must be quite intense - i wonder if you would find it helpful to express it outwards (through paintings, or writing, or whatever else - not sure if this would be appealing to you)

I wouldn't be able to, unfortunately.
Although...

Spoiler

I have absolutely no creativity, yet that system is able to create what I would never be able to even imagine. The issue is that it seems which one of us (consciousness or subconsciousness) is in control depends on how, well... conscious I am. It is a scale rather than a switch, fortunately, yet I have to be intoxicated (high or inebriated) enough to be its conduit while still remaining awake.
...which is why I prefer to work on creating dreams together while it is in control instead.
I wouldn't mind surrendering control or switching permanently if it were animate, by the way.

 

[lilmarei]

I think mostly of my dreams are in 3rd person, and sometimes I'm not even part of them

 

[Rocinante]

Does anyone else have nightmares about their appearance changing?

And then when I wake up I will think I look different so I’ll keep checking in the mirror and touching my face, or I’ll ask my relatives if I look different. I started wearing a face mask again incase it actually is different so no one will point at me and laugh. I also avoid think about or...

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