marksofdespair
eidolon
- Sep 28, 2025
- 64
I purchased a gun on September 28th with my 2nd paycheck from my new job. It was only $287.89, which was half of my check.
To my surprise, it arrived very quickly, making it to the store on October 1st. They closed at 6pm and I thought I had to pick it up THAT day, but I had just made it home at like 4:45pm and wouldn't have much time. I called the place asking what I needed to pick up the gun, said I was already aware I needed id and that I had my passport. I'm glad I said that because they proceeded to inform me that a passport wasn't a valid id to pick up a gun from their store.
I was beyond frustrated because of COURSE something was bound to go wrong; suicide couldn't be that easy lol. They told me the only thing I could use was a state issued id, or driver's license, and I had neither. Looked up how long it takes to get a state id, since a license was off the table, and it said 2-4 weeks. Well, I sort of dropped the thing, forgetting about it for the past week since things in my life have been decent enough to. Though just in the past day, things have gotten worse, reminded me of the gun, and I decided to call the location back to ask why a passport would not work as id. They said other gun stores do accept passports, just not them. I said I could try to get a state issued id but it might not arrive in time, then they told me that the paper one they give you until the REAL id arrives would be sufficient.
I'm excited, Maybe suicide will be this simple. All I have to do is go get a state id (hopefully tomorrow) then I can get the gun and blow out my brains. The ONLY issue is that I don't actually really have a way to the store. I don't have a vehicle of my own firstly. The person that was going to take me before has walked out of my life in just a week. My only resorts are A) ask my grandmother possibly and just lie to her about why I'm going. It's a pawn shop so it might be easy to hide the real reason. B) an uber. Not sure if you can even bring guns into ubers though.
I don't know but I will figure something out. I'm so eager to just shoot off my fuckin head. I despise everything about myself so much. I'm just glad I can end it soon. I'm a good for nothing failure and I believe suicide is my destiny and the universe will never stop torturing me until I suck it up and kill myself.
To my surprise, it arrived very quickly, making it to the store on October 1st. They closed at 6pm and I thought I had to pick it up THAT day, but I had just made it home at like 4:45pm and wouldn't have much time. I called the place asking what I needed to pick up the gun, said I was already aware I needed id and that I had my passport. I'm glad I said that because they proceeded to inform me that a passport wasn't a valid id to pick up a gun from their store.
I was beyond frustrated because of COURSE something was bound to go wrong; suicide couldn't be that easy lol. They told me the only thing I could use was a state issued id, or driver's license, and I had neither. Looked up how long it takes to get a state id, since a license was off the table, and it said 2-4 weeks. Well, I sort of dropped the thing, forgetting about it for the past week since things in my life have been decent enough to. Though just in the past day, things have gotten worse, reminded me of the gun, and I decided to call the location back to ask why a passport would not work as id. They said other gun stores do accept passports, just not them. I said I could try to get a state issued id but it might not arrive in time, then they told me that the paper one they give you until the REAL id arrives would be sufficient.
I'm excited, Maybe suicide will be this simple. All I have to do is go get a state id (hopefully tomorrow) then I can get the gun and blow out my brains. The ONLY issue is that I don't actually really have a way to the store. I don't have a vehicle of my own firstly. The person that was going to take me before has walked out of my life in just a week. My only resorts are A) ask my grandmother possibly and just lie to her about why I'm going. It's a pawn shop so it might be easy to hide the real reason. B) an uber. Not sure if you can even bring guns into ubers though.
I don't know but I will figure something out. I'm so eager to just shoot off my fuckin head. I despise everything about myself so much. I'm just glad I can end it soon. I'm a good for nothing failure and I believe suicide is my destiny and the universe will never stop torturing me until I suck it up and kill myself.
