Help People who want to die but know they can't yet, how do you cope?

[JustKillBen22]

Ok so I'm gonna try and explain what I mean. Basically, people who know they're gonna ctb soon, but feel they have to, or want to, stick around for a short while longer for whatever reason, what do you do to get yourself through it? I know I'm going to die and I struggle to do fucking anything, I can't even get out of bed some days, I just lie in bed on my phone, cry and sleep. But I don't want to go yet for a reason I won't get in to. What can I do to make the next short part of my life more bearable? Because this is not bearable right now. Cheers

 

[Ghost2211]

Keeping busy, distracting with gaming, and weed.

 

[LonelyNick]

I'm very sick, been sick all year because of gallbladder stones. I have a friend that travels from across the continent to come and visit me will land Friday. We set that up in February and for his mental health he needs this trip.

I'd say one of my biggest strength but also my biggest flaw is that I am a selfless person. I put other before myself all the time. I did promise myself that I would not do that anymore. After my friend leaves, I doing "the selfish" thing and ending my pain.

Until then, I take one day at the time. I focus on the little things, spoil myself and spend a lot of time on here. I gave up trying to talk to my neurotypical friends, they don't get it.

People here do. And that's how I cope. There's no magic pill, the days are long and painful and I wish I could just wave a wand to make everything better. But focusing on the little things has been helping me.

I hope you find peace

 

[Lupgevif]

I keep studying the method, sketching my suicide note... Meanwhile I pretend I am studying for college so my parents don't bitch about it. I can barely enjoy any kind of leisure, otherwise they just snap and start calling me lazy and worthless.

 

[Mr2005]

I'm lucky in that I've someone to live for unlucky in that it doesn't make me want to live. I wish it did for both our sakes

 

[JustKillBen22]

Keeping busy, distracting with gaming, and weed.

Games these days just piss me off most of the time and make me feel worse. Weed, drugs, alcohol, anything like that does help me, but I am genuinely too lazy to get hammered by myself and instead I just put it off for some reason, cause I'm a fucking idiot.

 

[EmptyManForever]

I must be the most unlucky person on here, i mean i literally cant feel pleasure from anything, i dunno whats wrong with me tho ,been to many doctors but no one could help,have been researching online for many years now ,nothing helpful i found, I've become so numb and have such an empty feeling all the time,and been unable to feel pleasure from anything sux so much ,so i dont have any coping mechanism,i just spend the days doing nothing,its extremely difficult and worst part is no one can help and no one understands it ,

 

[Salt]

cope,? thinking about it all day ,to make sure it gets successful , how,when.and just waiting for last moment eagerly.

 

[There Look! Nothing]

There's no one on earth that gives a fuck about what I'm doing / what happens to me, so I just do whatever is available to me. That's usually playing videogames and jamming to music. You could try a random hobby you never thought you'd do like playing an instrument. I would go out and do crazy stuff but I feel uncomfortable outside because my town is a dead-end cesspit. It's way too depressing to step out into. If I lived somewhere more appealing I'd be getting shitfaced drunk and going on wild country-spanning adventures with whatever money I could muster though probably. Treat the world like a big playground and see how long I could go before I got caught

 

[Mooshi]

Distractions, practicing my suicide note, sleeping, more distractions, and just knowing that in time all this pain will be over.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Purely distraction.

 

[snowman626]

watching tv series, eating

 

[purplesmoothie]

I don't know... For me I'm in a mental health facility so I'm just trying to get out so I ctb.

 

[fox21132113]

Wait,,,,and cry a lot

 

[riglad]

Just wait, i know its coming

 

[voidman]

Get bored and keep planning obsessively

 

[schopenh]

I live every day as if I'm not going to ctb while also meticulously planning for and preparing for my ctb. The contradiction propels me forward.

 

[Lmd]

I provoke myself lucid dreams when I feel at the bottom so at least I can be happy while im sleeping. I sleep for 10 or more hours and the I wake up pretending I care about my life or something

 

[pika8787]

Same here! Thinking of it everyday. Can't wait to be done with this life. I'm living with someone so i'm waiting the good time to do it. I'm really scared to fail so i'm making sure my plan is good.

 

[Huntfish34]

Exactly my thoughts scho- Tryy my best to carry on in a normal fashion.. While still thinking / knowing my Ctb Time is drawing in closer by the day.

And of course distractions... Are great whatever they may be,. Big or small.

 

[_Kaira_]

Honestly don't know how I do. Big part of it, as I lack the funds and a way to CTB. But at the same time I can't bring myself to do anything to change it. I so desperately want to. It's on my mind nearly 24/7 that it could be considered obsession. I've been spending a lot of time on SS. It makes some of this hell a little more tolerable.

When I'm not so tired, I do play some games. Lately not so much.

 

[Lilacmoon]

I don't. At all. I'm going even more insane.

 

[SheJumped]

Wait, research methods, wait.....

 

[sourpink]

prepare letters to people and letters explaining what I want done with the body, numb out with meds and weed, listen to music I know I'll actually miss, gradually allocate the necessary funds for method, hopefully at some point be able to acquire items needed for method, think about how beautiful leaving will feel, journal every thought in my head, and no longer give any fucks about my health.
and try to fake being fine so as to not raise further suspicion.

 

[elfgyoza]

I was hoping to be gone this month but seeing the mandalorian season 2 trailer might've changed my mind. I love star wars and seeing the trailer genuinely made me happy, which is odd as I'm usually completely empty. Knowing only one episode will be out per week makes it hard to stick around though, idk if I can wait that long. I have everything prepared for my ctb, just waiting for the right time

 

[allym101]

Self harming and listening to really depressing music. It's not about living at this point anymore, I'm literally just counting down the days. It's really tough being in that position, I feel you.

 

[Deleted member 19654]

I definitely think about ctb a lot. I'm currently unable to order SN because I'm living with my parents. Partial isn't really an option because I don't have a good anchor point unless by some miracle, I manage to use my door.

 

[okaoki]

Everyday i hope the next day would be better , not better as in no longer suicidal but
hope the next day i suffer less , same shit everyday ,i want to scream but i can't
im trapped, PLEASE people who are hurting me regardless directly or indirectly
please give me a break.

 

[NekoNomNom]

Cry. A lot.

I've been trying to get back into sketching. I have no talent for it though, so it's a bit difficult keeping up with it. Music, I suppose? All generic things, but I'm still here, so that must be it.

 

[k75]

There isn't much. I try to make myself look forward to things like upcoming games or new seasons of favorite shows, but it's harder and harder because I honestly don't even care most of the time. My hobbies aren't fun anymore, everything feels like a chore.

My main coping mechanism was sleep. As much as possible. But that backfires because it's always broken and riddled with nightmares. I usually stay awake as long as possible until I drop from exhaustion, and then at least I'm too tired to remember if I have bad dreams.

This might sound silly, but Animal Crossing kept me going this year. I let myself play it obsessively, and for whatever reason, it worked. Until recently. After literally thousands of hours since March, I don't feel like even turning on the tv anymore.

I must be the most unlucky person on here, i mean i literally cant feel pleasure from anything, i dunno whats wrong with me tho ,been to many doctors but no one could help,have been researching online for many years now ,nothing helpful i found, I've become so numb and have such an empty feeling all the time,and been unable to feel pleasure from anything sux so much ,so i dont have any coping mechanism,i just spend the days doing nothing,its extremely difficult and worst part is no one can help and no one understands it ,

That sounds like extreme anhedonia. I don't have any advice, but I understand how bad it feels. I don't really register any sort of pleasure or enjoyment anymore.