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P

Pallf

I'm tired
May 27, 2018
363
Does anyone else here think they've hit their peak and that it's all downhill from here? I've felt like this since middle School and it hasn't let up.
 
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T

Tiburcio

Guest
Same here. The bachelor's grade was my downfall. When I began it everything went to the shit. That gave me probably the worst days of my life.
 
F

FakeNews

Student
Apr 30, 2018
149
I've had peaks and valleys. When I was in HS, I didn't think I'd ever be happy. Had a few years of success, married a girl I met, was distracted and happy for a few years. Then divorce. I would have said I peaked at that point. My mood became dark again. But I focused on travel and started learning about other cultures and history and my career took aff again. Making money, traveling the world, feeling on top of the world. I decided to do something different. Got burned by someone I trusted. Dark thoughts again. I could say I've probably peaked but wtf do I know. Life is up and down for me. I've always had demons, just sometimes they don't occupy as many thought cycles as other times.......
 
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F

Flife

Member
May 21, 2018
18
Every time something happens I feel like it can't get worse, but then it always does. I'm so tired of life at this point. More importantly, I'm tired that people I trusted break their promises and leave. I don't understand how it's so easy for everyone to just forget me when I gave them my everything. I feel like I gave so much of me to everyone that I don't have anything left for myself anymore. And still it isn't enough for them. I'm never enough for them.
 
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Tiredman

Tiredman

Rest is best
Apr 30, 2018
228
My Peak was probably when I was in grade 11. I had good grades, lots of friends and was in peak physical health. I'd give anything to go back
 
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FullFat

FullFat

^best order at Micky-D's ever
Apr 27, 2018
374
Yes, and it's really painful to think about because the peak was only 3 years ago. It's too easy to compare my life then to the shitshow it is now. Only consoling thought is that the peak was pretty short-lived. Somehow, realizing it was a fluke makes me feel better, like maybe it's not really my fault for the downward spiral afterwards.

All I know is that it feels like life only chips away at my character; it never adds to it. Depression is simply who I am now. There's not much left besides it.
 
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C

CogitoMori

I won't be on as much as usual. Less alone time
Oct 21, 2024
416
I hit my peak a couple of years ago, at fucking McDonald's. My life looks like a tragedy, but I could swear it's a comedy.
 
F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
12,130
My main goal in life has been my (creative) career to the exclusion of everything else. I'm not sure I even want anything else now. I'm not even sure I want a creative career! It's more that it's the lesser of the evils while I'm stuck here.

I think it's more likely- if I'm able to continue in my prefered field that I'll make small improvements as I learn. I'm bound to make f*ck ups too of course. Still, I'll never be as good as I wanted to be. What's more strange is, the past few years, I've started to care less. I don't have the same drive and passion I used to. I still try to do a good job. It still bothers me greatly when I fail but, the love has largely gone out of it. So maybe for that reason too, I won't progress as much as I'd hoped. Even if I did, I'm not sure it would be enough to make me happy.

I have this weird relationship with my work. Someone I used to work for remarked that I wasn't good at taking compliments. I'd shrug it off- almost as if someone else had done the work. I think because in my mind, it is almost like someone else had done it. Being creative has been a coping mechanism for me since childhood. So, it's a bit like being praised for being maladjusted in a way. Plus, there's always something I'm unhappy with on pretty much everything I've done and I think we tend to focus on the negatives a lot.

For me though, it's like I might not have peaked but I don't know that I care to anymore. I want it all to be over more than anything else. Everything else pretty much feels like coping and distraction.
 
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dust-in-the-wind

dust-in-the-wind

Animal Lover
Aug 24, 2024
674
Yes but I really have peaked. I'm 55 so definitely all downhill for me. The landslide has already started.
 
Namelesa

Namelesa

· Global Moderator · Trapped in this Suffering
Sep 21, 2024
1,812
My life has had mostly been downhill with 2 peaks.

The first peak was after I was slowly painful struggling emotionally with school when covid happened where i was finally able to escape it and also transition. Then I went into college and I got into my first relationship and basically my first real friend. Tho that ended like 2 months and then I realized how lonely I was and felt really worthless and empty.

The second peak was when i went into my second relationship but it was intense and unstable due to our mental problems so it ended after a year.
 

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