pain free

[222sad]

I have been living like Job from the bible these past few years. Tried and failed to take my life last fall with Xanax alcohol and weed overdose attempt. I have chronic daily physical pain due to deformed damaged cervical spine and am on medicaid that will probably be cut by the govt. My last doctor yelled at me and said I have very bad insurance won't approve anything my tests or migraine medicine.

Haven't found work in over a year and have no car now. Don't know how I will work with my degenerative condition and all the severe full body chronic pain. My boyfriend told me he couldn't stay with me any longer last night. We have been together for five years living and I moved across country for him. I'm getting old. I have no way to start over in this condition and he knows it but feels like life with me is hell on earth because of all my incurable pain and sadness. He admits I didn't even do anything wrong he just can't take it any more.

I am thinking of going to mexico for some pain relief. It is easier to obtain there. I read some tweet from a doctor once that said all the gruesome suicide methods are unnecessarily sad when you can just do a lethal dose of morphine. Looks like that is up to 200 mg maybe. I'm just not sure if I ever needed to take this route how to do so without vomiting. Can it be done orally? Or with nausea suppressants. Just wondering if it would make for another messy failed attempt

 

[LastNite]

It's a rotten system sorry you had to go through all of that.

I dont think you need to go to mexico to get if you live in the U.S because opioids are somewhat easy to get in the U.S. If you just want morphine for temporary pain relief then taking it orally would be the best option. But if you plan to use it as a method of suicide then orally might not be the best. And morphine it self is weaker than most opioids. Theres other easily accessible opioids like fentanyl or heroin which produces similar and stronger pain relief effects but at a cost of being more dangerous. Read more on it in the opioids megathread or the peaceful pill ehandbook. I also dont think it's just 200mg for suicide... It might be more than that depending on you as person.

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds really dreadful, it sounds like you've suffered so much in this torturous existence, it's so cruel to me how there's all this suffering in existing, I hope you find the relief you search for.