Only Ever One Solution

[eternalbliss22]

All year I've been improving & seeing light at the end. Should off known better though. Constant obstacles have been wearing me down. Things beyond my control like cancelations & postponement of vitally needed things. Having to quit liked & needed activities outside the home due to other's manipulation. Cyber threats of spying like my camera light coming on my phone while nothing in use. Can't go into town near me without extreme anxiety. Now work is falling victim to shortages leaving me only working every other week at a time i need to pay for fixing my situation. I'm giving up & will do the exit bag. Already have the gas, just need a hose. Easy to pick up. No point in continuing this futile life. I only hope my cats go to good homes. I'm not setting a date only to fail. Just ready for the right mindset. So tired of life

 

[eternalbliss22]

My exit bag is complete, now just waiting for the right mindset. Experience shows that setting a ctb date is pointless if your not in the right mindset. I feel myself being crushed from all the weight. Struggling with coping with people's motives. Normals can't understand how what you know & what you feel can be so in opposition. How the stress of that alone can wear on you overtime. How trauma after trauma after trauma can pile on you. How hardships after hardship, etc. No outlet just trying to perceivere until death does release me.