On the flip...

[Sito]

I am sick of keeping my head above water. I have done nothing since 20 but fail starting up buisness and careers. About 2 months ago I took up selling insurance and its fallen through and this week I have to go back to full time work at a local warehouse slaving for basically min wage. I recently took out a life insurance policy on my mother and once she passes I'm going to wrap my things like selling the house and maybe trying to leave money for my kid. I got cheated on by a woman I settled for, my dating life has been non-existent for 5 years...
Even my own mother thinks I suck and constantly berates me and even gets to a point of racism since I'm mixed.
I have a good handful of friends I met a couple years ago and they make life worth looking forward to.
I try to change but my habits such as thc, drinking, and gambling from being younger and they've really stuck.
I always get into sick withdrawals when I stop than I always go back.
I have zero confidence no matter what I do to try and build it up I can never stay.
I don't want to die or feel like this.
I don't want to reach out and be put in some ward.
I need money I guess. They say money doesn't solve your problems, but it does because I know if I have even $1000 to my name I wouldn't want to kill myself.

 

[DeIetedUser4739]

I wish money could fix my problems but even a million dollars wouldn't.

 

[tired12345]

I think you've answered the question regarding ctb, you do not need it, you just need to take control and start again, look at a career that can get you the 1000 dollars that's always in your account, choose your friends wisely and who knows, when you are happier with money in the bank this will be a distant memory, your in a far better position than most here in that you don't want to die, take that nugget and try run with it and take control.

 

[Sito]

I think you've answered the question regarding ctb, you do not need it, you just need to take control and start again, look at a career that can get you the 1000 dollars that's always in your account, choose your friends wisely and who knows, when you are happier with money in the bank this will be a distant memory, your in a far better position than most here in that you don't want to die, take that nugget and try run with it and take control.

Its a cycle that's my point. I haven't had a savings in 5 years. I fall into viral money traps. "look at a career that can get you the 1000 dollars", Oh sure let let me go to "job land" where jobs grow on trees and are plentiful for the taking. Ive never had a career in my life.... im minimum wage fucking garbage. I fucking dropped out of college to start trying to sell life insurance.... You really dont know how fucked I am...I have $47 dollars to my name and over $1000 in credit card debt with no open lines...

Its a cycle that's my point. I haven't had a savings in 5 years. I fall into viral money traps. "look at a career that can get you the 1000 dollars", Oh sure let let me go to "job land" where jobs grow on trees and are plentiful for the taking. Ive never had a career in my life.... im minimum wage fucking garbage. I fucking dropped out of college to start trying to sell life insurance.... You really dont know how fucked I am...I have $47 dollars to my name and over $1000 in credit card debt with no open lines...

I am going to loose my house, I have no plans,

I think you've answered the question regarding ctb, you do not need it, you just need to take control and start again, look at a career that can get you the 1000 dollars that's always in your account, choose your friends wisely and who knows, when you are happier with money in the bank this will be a distant memory, your in a far better position than most here in that you don't want to die, take that nugget and try run with it and take control.

I don't come here often.. but ive joined and I'm here because I am in pain going through this cycle.. I can't keep doing this. I'm tired physically and emotionally.