
Lost Magic
Illuminated
- May 5, 2020
- 3,206
probably somewhere in the middle. I am desperate to die but of course there is a fear of the unknown. But think about it, we didn't know anything about this world before we were born.
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Exactly thisI'll go a 5, right down the middle.
Im not scared of death itself, im scared of how painful committing suicide will be and god forbid, failing.
I'm scared of that loneliness tooThe suicide/dying part doesn't scare me at all. I am afraid of surviving at all but worse would be to survive but be incapacitated and want to die but not be able to do it again. I'm scared of the feeling of loneliness during the (hopefully just a few) minutes until I pass out.
I am peaceful about that because I am an atheist.When I am in ideation mode, probably a 2. It sounds like the best option in those moments, and it doesn't scare me. I've only stopped myself due to SI and knowing that it's permanent.
Otherwise, around a 7-8. I know my life on earth really, really sucks, but I fear a lot of things relating to suicide. If my soul is reincarnated into something else, I have no control of what body I will be in or if my existence will be even worse than it is now. And I also can't grapple with being nothing for god knows how many years. It is a difficult concept to wrap my head around.
God can't judge you. He/She doesn't live a meanless and suffering human life.I'll go a 5, right down the middle.
Im not scared of death itself, im scared of how painful committing suicide will be and god forbid, failing.