Venting Nothing is enjoyable for me anymore and everything feels pointless.

[Red Moon]

Like the title says, I can play a game, I can watch a movie, come on SS/the internet but nothing is enjoyable for me anymore and everything feels pointless. I don't know if it's my autism or depression that I'm like this.

I want to just end my life and it seems pointless in me existing. I wish there were easier ways to die. Anyone else like this?

 

[FuneralCry]

Yes of course, I've always felt in such a way. I have no interest in being burdened with something so undesirable as existence, there is no point to existing, having the ability to exist is just meaningless suffering. I don't see why life should have to exist when the absence of everything is perfection, existence was completely unnecessary in the first place, really wish I never existed in my case.
And it's just so horrible and unacceptable how suicide is purposely made so inaccessible even know existing is completely futile with humans are just waiting around to die anyway, I'd always prefer to not exist no matter what.

 

[outrider567]

Yes, I've been this way for 2 years and 3 months

 

[Red Moon]

Yes of course, I've always felt in such a way. I have no interest in being burdened with something so undesirable as existence, there is no point to existing, having the ability to exist is just meaningless suffering. I don't see why life should have to exist when the absence of everything is perfection, existence was completely unnecessary in the first place, really wish I never existed in my case.
And it's just so horrible and unacceptable how suicide is purposely made so inaccessible even know existing is completely futile with humans are just waiting around to die anyway, I'd always prefer to not exist no matter what.

Yes, I've been this way for 2 years and 3 months

Glad I'm not the only one.

 

[sash]

Yep, just going thru the motions trying to fill my time to keep distracted til I can go

 

[ham and potatoes]

I feel you there. I've posted about this before, but I feel like I'm just living life on autopilot
I used to have hobbies I enjoyed, used to go places, used to do fun things and live life... Now I just wake up, go to work, come home, and loaf around my house
The hobbies I once loved feel like a chore now, the thought of traveling just sounds exhausting.
Basically nothing in life brings me joy or happiness anymore.

 

[Red Moon]

I feel you there. I've posted about this before, but I feel like I'm just living life on autopilot
I used to have hobbies I enjoyed, used to go places, used to do fun things and live life... Now I just wake up, go to work, come home, and loaf around my house
The hobbies I once loved feel like a chore now, the thought of traveling just sounds exhausting.
Basically nothing in life brings me joy or happiness anymore.

Yep, just going thru the motions trying to fill my time to keep distracted til I can go

The same thing is starting to happen for me, nothing is doing it for me anymore.

 

[Throwawayacc3]

The same thing is starting to happen for me, nothing is doing it for me anymore.

I've been going to extreme games to try and feel something. I got the Metal Gear Solid Collection (haven't touched it), got Exoprimal because it's got mech suits and dinosaurs and it's fine but it's not "enjoyable". I just finished another art piece and it's good but yeah not enjoy.
My head gets a little clearer at the animal sanctuary but that's about it. I'm 36.

 

[homesoon.]

It's become common for me to feel more and more like things just aren't enough and may never will be. No matter what, no matter how good of a day, I am miserable every time my head hits the pillow at the end and I become consumed by own misery. I don't blame others more than I blame my own self-sabotaging brain for it, though.

 

[Hollowman]

I feel you there. I've posted about this before, but I feel like I'm just living life on autopilot
I used to have hobbies I enjoyed, used to go places, used to do fun things and live life... Now I just wake up, go to work, come home, and loaf around my house
The hobbies I once loved feel like a chore now, the thought of traveling just sounds exhausting.
Basically nothing in life brings me joy or happiness anymore.

Ditto

 

[Red Moon]

I've been going to extreme games to try and feel something. I got the Metal Gear Solid Collection (haven't touched it), got Exoprimal because it's got mech suits and dinosaurs and it's fine but it's not "enjoyable". I just finished another art piece and it's good but yeah not enjoy.
My head gets a little clearer at the animal sanctuary but that's about it. I'm 36.

Same, I have a bunch of games that I have yet to open and my pc costed thousands but I can't bring myself to play, it's doing nothing for me and it was a massive waste of money.

It's become common for me to feel more and more like things just aren't enough and may never will be. No matter what, no matter how good of a day, I am miserable every time my head hits the pillow at the end and I become consumed by own misery. I don't blame others more than I blame my own self-sabotaging brain for it, though.

I'm beginning to feel the same.

 

[Throwawayacc3]

Same, I have a bunch of games that I have yet to open and my pc costed thousands but I can't bring myself to play, it's doing nothing for me and it was a massive waste of money.
I'm beginning to feel the same.

I remember having a custom built pc (just got a gaming laptop now) but getting Half Life 2 for Christmas - I played it everyday for weeks. HL2DM using radiators with the grav gun and blocking the stairs with tables and bookcases.
Last week I tried playing Warcraft 3 - played a few games and nothing.

The PS4 are just dirt cheap - exoprimal £10 (new), resident evil revelations 1 and 2 (£4 each), RE3R and RE2R £14 each. In theory these should last me months but I haven't had the energy to play them, rotted in bed or just gone out for a drive.

 

[Red Moon]

I remember having a custom built pc (just got a gaming laptop now) but getting Half Life 2 for Christmas - I played it everyday for weeks. HL2DM using radiators with the grav gun and blocking the stairs with tables and bookcases.
Last week I tried playing Warcraft 3 - played a few games and nothing.

The PS4 are just dirt cheap - exoprimal £10 (new), resident evil revelations 1 and 2 (£4 each), RE3R and RE2R £14 each. In theory these should last me months but I haven't had the energy to play them, rotted in bed or just gone out for a drive.

I never played Half life 2, maybe I should play it some day everyone said it was a masterpiece.

I have PS4, PS5, other consoles and games that I have in the backlog but I too just don't have the energy or drive to be playing.

 

[Ash’Girl]

Yes. My life is made up of distractions: binge watching tv/movies, gaming, reading. Work.

I don't enjoy any of it. I'm disconnected from humans - friends and family. Too socially anxious to go outside much. Mostly just work to pay bills. Everything is just filler though - filling time and trying to numb myself from the constant cycle of feeling either too emotionally overloaded, or completely disassociative. All feels largely pointless. This life feels like a prison.

 

[thealteredmind]

yeah and I hate it. just a few years ago I still enjoyed listening to new music. no I really can't do it. just now I tried to listen to a new jazz album from an artist I like... and goddamnit... it's not the same at all. yeah the music is cool but I don't have that... spark anymore. I used to be addicted to this thing... always downloading and absorbing new music like a maniac. no more. I really lost everything. I'm like a ghost.

 

[Raindancer]

Yes. My life is made up of distractions: binge watching tv/movies, gaming, reading. Work.

I don't enjoy any of it. I'm disconnected from humans - friends and family. Too socially anxious to go outside much. Mostly just work to pay bills. Everything is just filler though - filling time and trying to numb myself from the constant cycle of feeling either too emotionally overloaded, or completely disassociative. All feels largely pointless. This life feels like a prison.

I too feel very disconnected from people. It scares me.

 

[Erick]

Like the title says, I can play a game, I can watch a movie, come on SS/the internet but nothing is enjoyable for me anymore and everything feels pointless. I don't know if it's my autism or depression that I'm like this.

I want to just end my life and it seems pointless in me existing. I wish there were easier ways to die. Anyone else like this?

Your profile pic brings me so many memories. FF7 is a masterpiece.

 

[Throwawayacc3]

Your profile pic brings me so many memories. FF7 is a masterpiece.

My first FF was FFX. It blew me away on release - did one playthrough and then played it again with a guide to 100% everything. I got the remaster a few years ago on PS3 and realised this is the last time I'll ever get this sensation of the story. Thing just don't hit you anymore.

 

[Red Moon]

Yes. My life is made up of distractions: binge watching tv/movies, gaming, reading. Work.

I don't enjoy any of it. I'm disconnected from humans - friends and family. Too socially anxious to go outside much. Mostly just work to pay bills. Everything is just filler though - filling time and trying to numb myself from the constant cycle of feeling either too emotionally overloaded, or completely disassociative. All feels largely pointless. This life feels like a prison.

I feel the same way now, it's just distractions filler and everything feels pointless, I think I'm becoming disconnected from people too.

yeah and I hate it. just a few years ago I still enjoyed listening to new music. no I really can't do it. just now I tried to listen to a new jazz album from an artist I like... and goddamnit... it's not the same at all. yeah the music is cool but I don't have that... spark anymore. I used to be addicted to this thing... always downloading and absorbing new music like a maniac. no more. I really lost everything. I'm like a ghost.

Same with me.

Your profile pic brings me so many memories. FF7 is a masterpiece.

Yep it is a masterpiece.

My first FF was FFX. It blew me away on release - did one playthrough and then played it again with a guide to 100% everything. I got the remaster a few years ago on PS3 and realised this is the last time I'll ever get this sensation of the story. Thing just don't hit you anymore.

I only played the remastered version of FFX but I never played through X-2.

 

[sserafim]

Yes. My life is made up of distractions: gaming, reading.

I don't enjoy any of it. I'm disconnected from humans - friends and family. Too socially anxious to go outside much. Everything is just filler though - filling time and trying to numb myself from the constant cycle of feeling either too emotionally overloaded, or completely disassociative. All feels largely pointless. This life feels like a prison.

I'm disconnected from humans as well but I don't want to be connected to them anyways

I too feel very disconnected from people. It scares me.

Why does it scare you?

 

[Red Moon]

I'm disconnected from humans as well but I don't want to be connected to them anyways

Why does it scare you?

I can't really connect with people because of Asperger/Autism anyway.