S
snowboard9098
Member
- Mar 21, 2026
- 14
I'm writing texts that I'll send to people right now, but I feel so guilty. I know my death will severely affect some people in my life and honestly I'm not sure if they're even equipped to handle that. There's also just the weirdness of being gone like thinking about how everyone else's life is going to go on and you'll just be gone. It's honestly difficult for me to grasp even though I've been suicidal on and off for my whole life. I've never had a serious attempt though and I've never really sat down and thought about how my death would affect certain people. It almost feels selfish that I'm in so much pain that I'll commit an act that just transfers that pain to someone else. It's karmic it's very strange. I'm also a very existential person so that may be a factor.