Schadenfreude

Schadenfreude

Member
Dec 23, 2019
66
I was like that at the beginning too, back when I was a teenager. Ironically enough, I now have trouble with the opposite. I recall my ex telling me how frustrated he was because I never told him how I truly felt, but in the end it was for his own good. 'Friends' who listen to our mental health issues all have their limits, and will tire out once they realize we won't ever get 'any better'. I never asked them for help to begin with. I never asked them to 'fix' me. I just wanted someone to listen.
 
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JustVisiting

JustVisiting

Brain Tumour Killing Me
Dec 18, 2019
242
so get this. irl, no one really cares. write any of us! ❤️
 
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Buscolawhatelse

Buscolawhatelse

New Member
Jan 23, 2020
1
I'm sick of people saying they're there for you

Like they think they are but

They aren't maybe deep down they know
But I feel bad if they help me anyway because I'm draining and I'm constantly going through mental breakdowns

But if they can't help me no one can I mean they're my best friends they're why I'm alive so

I wanna die

They shouldn't
Also dont
Have to deal with this

I'm not worth it and they've made it clear
 
G

Ghost2211

Archangel
Jan 20, 2020
6,017
It's good to hear you are feeling better. Some topics are just not suited for in person friends. I know we want to think people should love and accept us for who we are, but people can't handle when people need help. Friends in groups like this that can relate and won't judge will help carry you through the lows of processing. I'm glad you see youre not alone this community takes care of one another.
 
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TAW122

TAW122

Emissary of the right to die.
Aug 30, 2018
6,819
I can relate too. I had some people who I talked to in the past and yeah they don't really make things better. Usually cliche advices, can't relate to my woes, and of course, unsolicited 'help', the annoying type. Then worst yet (like you said), they reach their limit and stop associating with me because I'm too negative. Well fuck them, I'm done with them and their patronizing and unsolicited advice is not welcome for me.

I suppose in one interesting aspect that I gained is a powerful realization that I'm alone, there is no help out there (at least for my problems), and it would be easier to CTB than someone who had lots of close relationships and what not, leading a good life, etc.
 
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Merith

Merith

Member
Oct 24, 2019
97
I wish to talk about it with people close to me, who know me personally, but that's a risk of having plans foiled, or relationships ruined... ironic. If someone close to me told me they were suicidal two years ago, I would do everything possible to change their mind. Now, if someone were to do the same, I would start planning out a partnered suicide for both them and myself.
 
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SuiSqueeze92

SuiSqueeze92

Self Saboteur
Jan 15, 2020
479
Yeah I can totally relate. People used to tell me, when I actually went places and met people lol, that I always just spoke about doctors and medicine or my problems. I can see how that would annoy people, but they don't see our POV, focusing on something that if worked, could give some their actual life back. I doubt it though for myself, there's a reason I have my title.
 
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Whitrot

Whitrot

Ghostly Garbage
Jan 21, 2020
3
I've done this forever, as I've never had a friend in real life. My family is on the level of strangers. My exposures been limited to solely online and "medical" staff. And I've had a lot of out of place, personally injected emotions on how to act or behave from medical staff. Things that have no place in the discussion of why I was there, like changing my interests or literally becoming involved in religion. It is like talking into thin air.

And online nobody has obligations to back up any single thing they say. I've known people for years and have gotten so close to them that it becomes on the level of I can guess what they will say or do. I can help them, but when it comes to me they cannot. Even when they have attempted on a larger scale to help me they've gotten cold feet and left me bewildered as to why. I've come to never outright believe words anymore.

And in the present I now have absolutely nobody. I actually like talking, yet my experience has never given me a reason to think I should be. I can talk as uncensored and illicit as I want to; but it is taken as seriously as an informal greeting even through the best people I've known.
 
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S

Stickyfinger

Member
Jan 18, 2020
6
Maybe your friends don't know how to deal with your problem. We are still a minority and people don't know how hard this is for us.
 

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