Venting no reason to be depressed

[sillypuppygirl]

does anyone else feel like they shouldn't feel suicidal? I have amazing friends. A loving boyfriend. My family situation isn't ideal but it could be a hundred times worse.
i feel like the only reason im so depressed is because of trauma. like i don't know if i can live with that heaviness for much longer. i know so many people will be so upset when i ctb but to be honest my pain is bigger than my guilt for leaving.
Its also really confusing because sometimes i will have some completely normal few days, and then one bad thing happens and i'm planning out my methods. for example an argument with my family or boyfriend. its like every tiny thing just pushes me over the edge and its so exhausting.
a short thread this time, but i'm just wondering if anyone feels the same way.

 

[blackjack711]

I've had a pretty similar experience all things considered, bad stuff happened to me in the past which makes me how I am now but I can't help feeling like there's no real reason for wanting to ctb, I mean I have a house, a job, food and all that. All in all I would try to look at what choice will make you experience the least suffering

 

[sillypuppygirl]

I've had a pretty similar experience all things considered, bad stuff happened to me in the past which makes me how I am now but I can't help feeling like there's no real reason for wanting to ctb, I mean I have a house, a job, food and all that. All in all I would try to look at what choice will make you experience the least suffering

yeah good point. i dont want to suffer like this anymore.

 

[blackjack711]

yeah good point. i dont want to suffer like this anymore.

I feel you there, I hope you find the peace you're looking for

 

[coolgal82]

same. my friends are cool, my parents are awesome and have done so much for me (despite me being awful to them), nothing that bad has really ever happened to me like i just had some minor struggles with school cus autism + adhd but like nothing beyond that, the only thing i truly have to be sad about is being trans but honestly that feels like it takes a backseat to everything else and yet idk, i kinda flip between "why am i so fucked when nothing has happened" and "im literally fine i have nothing to complain about its not that bad loads of other people have had it worse and are doing better" and just idk. i dont know why im like this