Venting No one will understand

[lostintheloop]

No one will ever get it till after my ctb
But it will all make sense
the glitch will be fixed.
The world changes forever
I'll be simply erased so there will be no memory of me . My family/friends won't feel loss as i'm not real and it'll be as if they never met me. All traces disappear. Here too
I've tried everything and this is all that makes sense. I get that no one gets it.
I know my method is selfish but it's not that simple. You see it isnt about killing me as I'm not alive. It is simply an action to exit the system and that is the only action and route out.
Yes i'm getting professional help and tried many things. But they've been unable to diagnose me with anything because i'm not ill . Just defective and human techniques wont work on something not human.
I don't see the problem or why they want to stop me when Im not a person and when my existence is killing many.
Greater good is so much more important
I only bring pain and it is pain for me too.
This has to end
It is sick and twisted that i've been allowed to stay here for so long. It has to stop soon. Just need the courage. It will be over in minutes once I do. Nothing to be afraid of as not death just stopping what shouldn't start

 

[lostintheloop]

Fucking drones spying on me again tonight. They're putting pressure on me to exit soon or they'll kill my family to get to me. Who don't deserve it at all so can't let it get to them.
I need to stop being so pathetic, moaning on here about it for such a long time instead of doing what is clear to everyone what has to be done.

 

[dontwakemeup]

I dont want to be rude and I mean no harm in asking this. Do you have schizophrenia? I'm in no position to diagnose someone but that would be my 1st guess. What are the specialist think is wrong with you? This must all be so overwhelming to worry about all this and to care for your family. If you leave, who will care for your family and watch after them?

 

[lostintheloop]

I dont want to be rude and I mean no harm in asking this. Do you have schizophrenia? I'm in no position to diagnose someone but that would be my 1st guess. What are the specialist think is wrong with you? This must all be so overwhelming to worry about all this and to care for your family. If you leave, who will care for your family and watch after them?

No, I don't.
The service I'm getting support from specialises in psychosis but i have no diagnosis yet as they're unsure. I think they've started to realise i'm not ill and speak truth.
My family can look after themselves.