No one understands me.

[korchoi]

I am a 39-year-old man who has been suffering from panic disorder for 23 years. My heart races so fast all day long that I've nearly gone into cardiac arrest on many occasions, yet miraculously, I am still alive. The trauma from my panic attacks leaves me unable to do anything; I even struggle to watch TV because a panic attack once struck while I was doing so. Psychiatric treatment over the past 17 years hasn't really helped.
I am currently living with my parents, unemployed, and suffering from terrible chest pain every day. It breaks my heart whenever people say I don't get a job because I lack willpower. I know that death is my only salvation. I just want to be free from this pain as soon as possible.

 

[Ben 111]

You're not alone can I see ur pic

 

[unluckysadness]

I feel you. I'm 43 and I've experienced panic attack, severe agoraphobia and constant stress / traumas since I was 16 (so at the same age than you). Unfortunately I'm still here with other severe disabilities. I have a rare neuromuscular disease that gives me muscle spasms and my body aches all the time. My panic attacks began in high school because of constant stress (bullying, mockery, ...) When you say "no one understands me", it's exactly the way I feel.
You're not alone struggling like this. I hope you'll be free from your pain soon. Take care

 

[korchoi]

You're not alone can I see ur pic

Thank you for the reply. However, I'd rather not show my ugly face.

 

[Ben 111]

Why does everyone here consider themselves ugly

 

[korchoi]

I feel you. I'm 43 and I've experienced panic attack, severe agoraphobia and constant stress / traumas since I was 16 (so at the same age than you). Unfortunately I'm still here with other severe disabilities. I have a rare neuromuscular disease that gives me muscle spasms and my body aches all the time. My panic attacks began in high school because of constant stress (bullying, mockery, ...) When you say "no one understands me", it's exactly the way I feel.
You're not alone struggling like this. I hope you'll be free from your pain soon. Take care

I am glad to have met someone who shares my experience.
My heart aches knowing how much you must be suffering; it is truly difficult when physical pain is added to the mix. I pray that your pain goes away.