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lovelulu

lovelulu

with stars in my eyes, crying as I wheel.
Jan 3, 2026
240
there was this one tiktok that really explained how I felt really well. It said "when the constant state of apathy wears off and suddenly I'm the most miserable person in the world and everything l've been not feeling for months is rushing out, realize how ugly l am and that I can't do anything about it or fix myself, so all I do is cry while feeling like a massive emotions explode inside me and the only way to release it by smashing my own head and sick thoughts that ruined my life and turned me into shitty person."
This is exactly how I feel for most of my life. Once something triggers intense emotions, I feel it for the whole day or for a few days. Once that wears off, all I have left is anger and frustration left. I dont know whats wrong with me, honestly. Im just another mentally ill person. It's like I want something that excuses my actions or something, something that makes me different from other people struggling. Im so weird and pathetic.
 
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