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Funeralprincess

Death never turned on me
May 8, 2022
433
I only have about two months left to be alive in this disgusting planet. I can't help but feel a little bit nervous when it comes to SN. I'm worried my tachycardia will kick in, and I'm still struggling to obtain beta blockers despite already having heart issues as it is. I'm scared I'll have my SI kick in if I feel that I can't breathe…. There's so much I'm anxious about but at the same time, I am sure I want to die in fact, I need to die because I do not belong here and this world isn't for people like me. I'm trying to fire out how to control my SI. I envy people Who can control it with ease, and I only wish that were me. Sometimes I feel my stupid SI is what has kept me here in the past and it aggravates me. Why can't we just be born with a self destruct button? I am angered at times that we even have to find ways to die and can't just be euthanized. It's annoying how you essentially have to have a chronic illness, or commit a serious crime to be put down by a doctor and I just wish as a mentally ill person I had that same access so I wouldn't have to do all this myself. Planning death is honestly hard and annoying, but living is harder. I just am nervous about this and I want to get over any nerves I have because I have to do this and I only have a limited amount of time that I can
 
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T

Tiemblo

Member
May 18, 2022
44
My girlfriend is out for three days. I am home alone. I have the chance of cbt with sn, meto and benzos…tomorrow seems the day to finally pass away.
 
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S

Seeking_Peace

Arcanist
May 18, 2022
476
Stay up for 2 days and then take it. You'll be too exhausted to worry. You basically just took a huge sleeping pill right before.
 
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blue_muse

blue_muse

Mage
Jan 31, 2021
553
From what you've said; you don't sound ready. Perhaps take some time to really get your head around dying, before doing anything hasty. It's what SS is here for after all :heart:.
 
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September5th

September5th

You can get better. But the choice is always ours.
May 17, 2022
244
When the SI kick in, remember the first day you visited his place and how you were happy and hopeful. Remember his smile and your plans. That's what I'm doing. It's why I'm killing myself in our anniversary.
 
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Sweet Chainsaw

Sweet Chainsaw

Member
Dec 6, 2020
46
Dude, you got yourself a mighty nice SN.

Meanwhile, I'm nervous about getting it caught in the customs and getting into trouble with police in my country!

It's like people complaining about sex addiction.
You are getting laid, I'm not!!
ARRGGGGGHHH!!!

--------

You are going to be fine, whichever direction you take.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,289
Suicide really is so difficult and I'm sorry that you have to deal with these fears. Assisted suicide should be a human right, we all deserve the option of a peaceful death with no worries. I also see myself as not being meant for this world. I wish that it is easier to finally be at peace and be where I belong. I hope that you find what you are looking for.
 
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F

Funeralprincess

Death never turned on me
May 8, 2022
433
My girlfriend is out for three days. I am home alone. I have the chance of cbt with sn, meto and benzos…tomorrow seems the day to finally pass away.
I wish you nothing but peace. I hope you pass safely
Stay up for 2 days and then take it. You'll be too exhausted to worry. You basically just took a huge sleeping pill right before.
That's really a smart idea and I may consider it. I'm also trying to obtain N as well
From what you've said; you don't sound ready. Perhaps take some time to really get your head around dying, before doing anything hasty. It's what SS is here for after all :heart:.
I definitely am ready. I've had about two years to think on it. I've just always had a strong SI in general
When the SI kick in, remember the first day you visited his place and how you were happy and hopeful. Remember his smile and your plans. That's what I'm doing. It's why I'm killing myself in our anniversary.
Dude that's wild! I'd actually end up dying on his birthday. I try and remember how he finds this whole thing comical, and how he doesn't give a fuck about me. I remember how he just… just made me feel like I'm truly not worth as much as he was to me. I remind myself of that and I suppose that does help a bit
Dude, you got yourself a mighty nice SN.

Meanwhile, I'm nervous about getting it caught in the customs and getting into trouble with police in my country!

It's like people complaining about sex addiction.
You are getting laid, I'm not!!
ARRGGGGGHHH!!!

--------

You are going to be fine, whichever direction you take.
Well, sex addiction is something to complain about considering they don't feel anything and sex addiction places people in positions to be raped, abused, and more so that's a poor comparison and example. I also didn't have an easy time getting the SN, nor will obtaining N be easy if I have that as a back up too
Suicide really is so difficult and I'm sorry that you have to deal with these fears. Assisted suicide should be a human right, we all deserve the option of a peaceful death with no worries. I also see myself as not being meant for this world. I wish that it is easier to finally be at peace and be where I belong. I hope that you find what you are looking for.
I hope so too. Yes suicide is really hard and it's becoming draining being alive
 
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