I

inevitableandplannd

Member
Oct 28, 2023
15
I'm on the verge of getting a single-round 12ga shotgun to CTB soon. I looked through TAW122's guide, which was informative, and I found the FFL dealer I wanna use & verified I can ship to them and do the BG check and whatever else with them.

So why am I so nervous? I keep having these paranoid thoughts that they'll be able to tell why I'm buying it and basically laugh me out of the shop, and keep the gun. I'm also a little nervous about the interpersonal aspect of CTB. I have a few people who I know will be a bit put out by all that, and even though this is the only way, the people pleaser in me can't stop thinking that I can somehow set up my death in a way that brings them peace and comfort.

Other than that, it's exciting to be so close to freedom! If I could escape some other way, I would, but that's just the way these things go. I love so many things and animals and people, and I will miss them dearly. But I will finally be free
 
  • Like
  • Love
  • Hugs
Reactions: downagain, steygrone, marchshift and 6 others
I

ilovemydog

Member
Dec 15, 2021
54
This is EXACTLY how I feel. I never thought I would find someone else going through the same emotions and thoughts about this as me..
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: marchshift, ms_beaverhousen, pthnrdnojvsc and 1 other person
1MiserableGuy

1MiserableGuy

Specialist
Dec 30, 2023
365
I'm on the verge of getting a single-round 12ga shotgun to CTB soon. I looked through TAW122's guide, which was informative, and I found the FFL dealer I wanna use & verified I can ship to them and do the BG check and whatever else with them.

So why am I so nervous? I keep having these paranoid thoughts that they'll be able to tell why I'm buying it and basically laugh me out of the shop, and keep the gun. I'm also a little nervous about the interpersonal aspect of CTB. I have a few people who I know will be a bit put out by all that, and even though this is the only way, the people pleaser in me can't stop thinking that I can somehow set up my death in a way that brings them peace and comfort.

Other than that, it's exciting to be so close to freedom! If I could escape some other way, I would, but that's just the way these things go. I love so many things and animals and people, and I will miss them dearly. But I will finally be free
I have something of the opposite problem. I would love to own a gun for purely self defense reasons. My wife won't allow me to because of my history of suicidal ideation, but she doesn't understand that it's just plain and simply not one of my ctb options. Way too much room to get that one wrong and live life with a new disability.
 
  • Like
Reactions: downagain
I

inevitableandplannd

Member
Oct 28, 2023
15
This is EXACTLY how I feel. I never thought I would find someone else going through the same emotions and thoughts about this as me..
Me neither; that's rather interesting to me. I wish you peace on your journey. And thank you for commenting. I feel less alone because of it.
I have something of the opposite problem. I would love to own a gun for purely self defense reasons. My wife won't allow me to because of my history of suicidal ideation, but she doesn't understand that it's just plain and simply not one of my ctb options. Way too much room to get that one wrong and live life with a new disability.
i know what you mean about having no interest in a particular option. also, big agree on the fear of vegetizing -- when it's my turn i'm probably going to use a mirror or something to make sure i'm at a good angle for the medulla oblongata.

in any case, i feel you, and i wish you peace <3
 
Last edited:
  • Love
Reactions: ilovemydog
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,914
I wish you the best of luck in your plans, I hope that you find the freedom you search for.
 
  • Love
Reactions: inevitableandplannd
TAW122

TAW122

Emissary of the right to die.
Aug 30, 2018
6,872
I was nervous years ago when I bought mine (like over 6 years ago or so) and I would just say that it's normal to be a little nervous, but I would do my best to maintain composure. This is because if you give off any hesitation or awkwardness, it may raise some suspicion or at least invite some unwanted probing into your intentions. Anyways, I would just say once you have selected the firearm you want, sent it to the FFL of your choice, and then you just show up and fill out the paperwork (Form 4473) then they do a background check, and if you passed (which I believe you would assuming you are not a prohibited person), then congratulations, you can walk out with the firearm that you legally purchased!
 
LunarLight

LunarLight

i'm a loser, a failure
Apr 3, 2024
1,368
I have something of the opposite problem. I would love to own a gun for purely self defense reasons. My wife won't allow me to because of my history of suicidal ideation, but she doesn't understand that it's just plain and simply not one of my ctb options. Way too much room to get that one wrong and live life with a new disability.
If you put the gun in your mouth and aim for the brainstem, there are 0.01% chances you fail.
 
  • Like
Reactions: pthnrdnojvsc, marchshift and divinemistress36
ham and potatoes

ham and potatoes

Just some hillbilly
Mar 27, 2024
414
As someone who has spent their whole life around guns, and living in a very gun friendly place, being nervous about buying a gun is kinda foreign to me.
If you were clearly nervous, clueless about guns, and trying to by an AR15 with a 50 round mag, that might draw some attention.
But the fact your buying a single shot shotgun shouldnt raise any eyebrows.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Forveleth, inevitableandplannd, marchshift and 1 other person
Timothy7dff

Timothy7dff

Wizard
Apr 10, 2024
661
Gun store employees are just like employees at any store. They're not looking for terrorists or suicidal people. They're just there do to their job.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Forveleth, marchshift and divinemistress36
I

inevitableandplannd

Member
Oct 28, 2023
15
As someone who has spent their whole life around guns, and living in a very gun friendly place, being nervous about buying a gun is kinda foreign to me.
If you were clearly nervous, clueless about guns, and trying to by an AR15 with a 50 round mag, that might draw some attention.
But the fact your buying a single shot shotgun shouldnt raise any eyebrows.
Thanks, this puts me at ease. Very very soon, i hope
 
L

LaughingGoat

Mage
Apr 11, 2024
590
.01% too high
The actual percentage in reality has to be much lower. I have done a lot of searching and have yet to find a single documented case of a shotgun attempt failing when aiming at the brain through the mouth with functioning gun and ammo. Name any other common method and I am confident statistics show the method is less reliable.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Don’tDoxMe and pthnrdnojvsc
pthnrdnojvsc

pthnrdnojvsc

Extreme Pain is much worse than people know
Aug 12, 2019
2,746
The actual percentage in reality has to be much lower. I have done a lot of searching and have yet to find a single documented case of a shotgun attempt failing when aiming at the brain through the mouth with functioning gun and ammo. Name any other common method and I am confident statistics show the method is less reliable.
Yeah especially if you can put the shotgun 2.5 to 3 inches inside the mouth , past the teeth, aimed at the brain stem, aimed at an upward angle

OIP.HTruZK0_1l1Bd3Et8rhg1wHaGC


OIP.RCC7nGuMWGf4KZF2yVW0qwHaHa
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: LaughingGoat and Forveleth

Similar threads

charaunderground
Replies
7
Views
206
Suicide Discussion
cloudyskye
C
witchcraft
Replies
0
Views
71
Suicide Discussion
witchcraft
witchcraft
toxicjester
Replies
2
Views
265
Suicide Discussion
broken_stoic
broken_stoic
Wanting yet Unable
Replies
11
Views
279
Suicide Discussion
Wanting yet Unable
Wanting yet Unable