I
inevitableandplannd
Member
- Oct 28, 2023
- 15
I'm on the verge of getting a single-round 12ga shotgun to CTB soon. I looked through TAW122's guide, which was informative, and I found the FFL dealer I wanna use & verified I can ship to them and do the BG check and whatever else with them.
So why am I so nervous? I keep having these paranoid thoughts that they'll be able to tell why I'm buying it and basically laugh me out of the shop, and keep the gun. I'm also a little nervous about the interpersonal aspect of CTB. I have a few people who I know will be a bit put out by all that, and even though this is the only way, the people pleaser in me can't stop thinking that I can somehow set up my death in a way that brings them peace and comfort.
Other than that, it's exciting to be so close to freedom! If I could escape some other way, I would, but that's just the way these things go. I love so many things and animals and people, and I will miss them dearly. But I will finally be free
So why am I so nervous? I keep having these paranoid thoughts that they'll be able to tell why I'm buying it and basically laugh me out of the shop, and keep the gun. I'm also a little nervous about the interpersonal aspect of CTB. I have a few people who I know will be a bit put out by all that, and even though this is the only way, the people pleaser in me can't stop thinking that I can somehow set up my death in a way that brings them peace and comfort.
Other than that, it's exciting to be so close to freedom! If I could escape some other way, I would, but that's just the way these things go. I love so many things and animals and people, and I will miss them dearly. But I will finally be free