Help need advice about ctb!

[allidoiswish]

hello! i was planning to ctb soon (partial hanging) but i dont think ill be able to anymore. i still live with my mother and i do not want her to find my dead body since i know that will traumatize her for the rest of her life, she is the only person i care for and that truly loves me on this earth so i do not want her to go through that. i have thought about jumping, but im scared ill survive and i dont even have access to any of the rooftops near me. I've also thought about waiting a few years until i move out but i really dont want to. i genuinely hate my life lol. should i still try and wait tho? or should i look again for a place where i could jump? thank you for taking the time to read this!

 

[Kanau_Nano]

I'm really sorry you feel like this. It's very hard to deal with. Since you love your mom so much i truly hope you find some hope for life to keep going for the both of you. I'm trying the same thing

 

[allidoiswish]

I'm really sorry you feel like this. It's very hard to deal with. Since you love your mom so much i truly hope you find some hope for life to keep going for the both of you. I'm trying the same thing

thank you so much! youre so nice, i hope you do too <3

 

[ginadu]

It's amazing to have someone in your life that you love and you know wholeheartedly loves you back. You are lucky.

 

[allidoiswish]

It's amazing to have someone in your life that you love and you know wholeheartedly loves you back. You are lucky.

thank you! im also glad i atleast have someone i know loves me. shes the only reason i still havent ctb ♡

 

[MyMomWasMyLife]

You have reason to live. You love your mom and she loves you. She's be devastated if you went through with it. Now, or later. She's have to live with the pain and trauma of that decision for the rest of her life. I can tell you love her too much for that. You are still very young by the sound of it and you still have plenty of time to turn things around. Stay strong.

 

[allidoiswish]

You have reason to live. You love your mom and she loves you. She's be devastated if you went through with it. Now, or later. She's have to live with the pain and trauma of that decision for the rest of her life. I can tell you love her too much for that. You are still very young by the sound of it and you still have plenty of time to turn things around. Stay strong.

Thank you. (..◜ᴗ◝..) I know I'm young, and I know I should believe in "better days" but I've been waiting for those days since I was a child. Everything I've ever done, even the simple act of staying alive, has been for my mother. But the truth is, I'm tired. It doesn't get better.. it just gets louder every year. I try to keep a brave face, but the optimism is wearing thin. Still, if it keeps her happy, I can endure anything. I'll bear it for as long as she's here. After that... I don't know.

 

[Front Back]

You're still here for a reason. I really hoped you cancel or atleast postponed your plan.
It doesn't hurt trying to know location for CTB but knowing where you'll go when it about to end often pushes you to go there even more, I have no rights of telling this but please continue on living for a while.

 

[ginadu]

It might just take the right therapist or the right medication to get you through this. Reach out to services that can help you