• UK users: Due to a formal investigation into this site by Ofcom under the UK Online Safety Act 2023, we strongly recommend using a trusted, no-logs VPN. This will help protect your privacy, bypass censorship, and maintain secure access to the site. Read the full VPN guide here.

  • Hey Guest,

    Today, OFCOM launched an official investigation into Sanctioned Suicide under the UK’s Online Safety Act. This has already made headlines across the UK.

    This is a clear and unprecedented overreach by a foreign regulator against a U.S.-based platform. We reject this interference and will be defending the site’s existence and mission.

    In addition to our public response, we are currently seeking legal representation to ensure the best possible defense in this matter. If you are a lawyer or know of one who may be able to assist, please contact us at [email protected].

    Read our statement here:

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC): 34HyDHTvEhXfPfb716EeEkEHXzqhwtow1L
    Ethereum (ETH): 0xd799aF8E2e5cEd14cdb344e6D6A9f18011B79BE9
    Monero (XMR): 49tuJbzxwVPUhhDjzz6H222Kh8baKe6rDEsXgE617DVSDD8UKNaXvKNU8dEVRTAFH9Av8gKkn4jDzVGF25snJgNfUfKKNC8
Wakawaka

Wakawaka

Student
Dec 10, 2020
154
it wasnt supposed to be here until tomorrow, i wanted to see some people one last time, i spent my birthday alone this month and thought maybe i could do a late celebration, thought maybe i couldve waited till around christmas, holding it in my hands feels different, my chest hurts so much, but i feel oddly calm, i was going to eat a good breakfast but this empty stomach would be the ideal situation

maybe its finally my time
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: drnhng, Pookie, Bigpink and 10 others
W

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,163
Good luck and I really hope you can find peace!
 
  • Like
Reactions: Wakawaka
NodusTollens

NodusTollens

Nov 17, 2020
989
Sorry you had to spend your birthday alone, & that things have gotten so bad for you OP. Hopefully this helps you going forward.

I was relieved to hear you received your SN, a few people's have been stopped lately.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Wakawaka
Wakawaka

Wakawaka

Student
Dec 10, 2020
154
i know you arent supposed to drink beer before sn, but do you rhink if i take more sn to compensate likely throwing up it will work out
 
Despondent

Despondent

Archangel
Dec 20, 2019
6,777
If you choose to go now or to wait it out, I wish you peace :heart:
 
  • Like
Reactions: Wakawaka
Thanatonaut

Thanatonaut

My time is coming.
May 17, 2019
264
I wish you good journeys, peace, and happiness.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Wakawaka
Wakawaka

Wakawaka

Student
Dec 10, 2020
154
sigh, when i heard rattling i thought they mightve put a scooper in it for some reason, now i know why
 

Attachments

  • 20201216_153855.jpg
    20201216_153855.jpg
    1.5 MB · Views: 27
voyager

voyager

Don't you dare go hollow...
Nov 25, 2019
963
I think that happens if it there's no anti-caking agent in it, which iirc is as a good thing. But my memory is so lousy so don't take my word for it.

Hope you find peace with whatever you choose.

PS: Is it the pic or do the sides look moist?
 
Wakawaka

Wakawaka

Student
Dec 10, 2020
154
I think that happens if it there's no anti-caking agent in it, which iirc is as a good thing. But my memory is so lousy so don't take my word for it.

Hope you find peace with whatever you choose.

PS: Is it the pic or do the sides look moist?
thank you, and it might be my phones flash light, it had a white plastic covering the top underneath the cap
 
  • Like
Reactions: voyager
Nymph

Nymph

he/him
Jul 15, 2020
2,564
Good luck, sorry for what you've been through. I hope you can find peace
 
Floria

Floria

Member
Nov 5, 2020
34
I hope you'll find peace, if you want you can documet how you're feeling and your method. I'm here if you want to talk.
 
Wakawaka

Wakawaka

Student
Dec 10, 2020
154
i cant stop crying i just want a hug
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: drnhng, Floria, Meditation guide and 9 others
S

Spitfire

Enlightened
Apr 26, 2020
1,273
i know you arent supposed to drink beer before sn, but do you rhink if i take more sn to compensate likely throwing up it will work out
Be careful because too much alcohol will interfere with the whole process. :hug:
 
  • Like
Reactions: Wakawaka
G

Ghost2211

Archangel
Jan 20, 2020
6,015
Hugs to you op. How are you? Clumping and yellowing is fine as long as no moisture.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Spitfire
rabbithole

rabbithole

Experienced
Oct 26, 2020
271
Is it from the HM brand? I think we have the same one. A million hugs to you friend and I hope you find a way that isn't ctb. It seems like you're really freaked out but I could be reading it wrong I don't know. If you have no other options I wish you peace physically and mentally.
Is it from the HM brand? I think we have the same one. A million hugs to you friend and I hope you find a way that isn't ctb. It seems like you're really freaked out but I could be reading it wrong I don't know. If you have no other options I wish you peace physically and mentally.
I also just wanted a hug when I got my SN because it's like this secret you have to keep. You want to tell everyone so they can save you but you can't because you know you need to do it. Or at least have the option to. Idk. I don't like keeping secrets from my family it makes me feel gross.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: Meditation guide, Nexuno and justanotherstar
Wakawaka

Wakawaka

Student
Dec 10, 2020
154
Is it from the HM brand? I think we have the same one. A million hugs to you friend and I hope you find a way that isn't ctb. It seems like you're really freaked out but I could be reading it wrong I don't know. If you have no other options I wish you peace physically and mentally.

I also just wanted a hug when I got my SN because it's like this secret you have to keep. You want to tell everyone so they can save you but you can't because you know you need to do it. Or at least have the option to. Idk. I don't like keeping secrets from my family it makes me feel gross.
from hi yes

i cant really drink it, only a few sips, i dont care about throwing up, maybe a few more shots of vodka can help me get through more of the sn, i just need a little bit in my system

i dont want to be a failure tonight

i already started weirding my friends out, some of them got mad at me, asked me what i could possible be going through and i hung up, said sorry for bothering them

please let me drink this
 
Last edited:
  • Hugs
Reactions: rabbithole and Meditation guide
A

AutoTap

Elementalist
Nov 11, 2020
885
Hey man if your struggling to do it that means it's probably not the time. Now that you have it you can wait if you want.

either way I wish you peace
 
  • Like
Reactions: Pookie
Wakawaka

Wakawaka

Student
Dec 10, 2020
154
Hey man if your struggling to do it that means it's probably not the time. Now that you have it you can wait if you want.

either way I wish you peace
im a failure as usual
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: drnhng and BluesRunTheGame
BluesRunTheGame

BluesRunTheGame

Blackpilled
Dec 15, 2020
1,715
Mate if it's not your time tonight then it's not your time tonight. You ain't no failure. Just enjoy the vodka for tonight I say :)
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: Pookie, Wakawaka and Nexuno
B

Bigpink

Warlock
Oct 12, 2020
706
Don't be so hard on yourself. As Autotap says maybe it's not your time just now. You have SN in your possession, the means are at hand.
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: Spitfire, Wakawaka and Nexuno

Similar threads

OhhDrugzZ
Replies
2
Views
170
Suicide Discussion
teflon997
T
Açucarzinho583
Replies
15
Views
449
Suicide Discussion
Açucarzinho583
Açucarzinho583
S
Replies
3
Views
185
Suicide Discussion
Cauliflour
Cauliflour
Cat_Zoe
Replies
3
Views
170
Suicide Discussion
Griever
Griever
K
Replies
30
Views
1K
Suicide Discussion
broth0100
broth0100