I have resolved to CTB soon. My decision is actually rather rational, I feel. I'm not doing this out of grief or strife necessarily. Given my circumstances, that I've categorically failed at life by every metric and it would be herculean to "catch up" or make my life at all stable. The way that my society is headed economically and politically. My purview of the future is that it will not be much worth living, only a life of working to barely sustain living. I don't really see any huge cataclysmic events occurring, just a slow grinding decrease in quality of living until everything inevitably peters out.
My plan is to take a shotgun up to the peak of a mountain I'm rather fond of, drink one last half pint of fine whiskey then do the deed. It's very remote and I doubt anyone would cross paths with me, and even if I did I would be within my rights and not look out of place. I will no doubt traumatize my mother, which I am mournful of. I plan on texting her a short, curt apologetic note then calling 911 and informing them of who I am, what I am about to do and of my location so they can come recover my body.
The advice I'm looking for is as follows
-What are some ways I can arrange to have my body dealt with in a way that will not financially burden anyone? Two options I have seen are a prearranged cremation or donating my body to science, I've also been told that the state will cremate it for free given the next of kin is not financially capable of handling it.
-Is there some way I can ensure my mother will never see my body? It will be pretty gruesome, and I have this inkling that the police will have her come look at it to ensure it really is me. If I leave some sort of written instruction that I forbid my mother from seeing my body until it is cremated, will they be beholden to them?
My plan is to take a shotgun up to the peak of a mountain I'm rather fond of, drink one last half pint of fine whiskey then do the deed. It's very remote and I doubt anyone would cross paths with me, and even if I did I would be within my rights and not look out of place. I will no doubt traumatize my mother, which I am mournful of. I plan on texting her a short, curt apologetic note then calling 911 and informing them of who I am, what I am about to do and of my location so they can come recover my body.
The advice I'm looking for is as follows
-What are some ways I can arrange to have my body dealt with in a way that will not financially burden anyone? Two options I have seen are a prearranged cremation or donating my body to science, I've also been told that the state will cremate it for free given the next of kin is not financially capable of handling it.
-Is there some way I can ensure my mother will never see my body? It will be pretty gruesome, and I have this inkling that the police will have her come look at it to ensure it really is me. If I leave some sort of written instruction that I forbid my mother from seeing my body until it is cremated, will they be beholden to them?
