My parents destroyed my life

[gomenasai]

@Nemo thank you

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

Life is extremely difficult if your parents abandoned you, neglected you, abused you, or failed in any way in their duty of care. Growing up knowing your parents don't love you in the way you need to be loved is a terrible thing. All of you deserve better than what you were given.

Family is upheld as a sacred institution, it is expected and assumed that all parents will care for their children and raise them to the best of their ability. When these expectations are subverted, it often feels like there's nowhere to turn to. The world expects everyone to have decent, loving parents, and this is often not the case.

Having no one to fill the role of a mentor, guardian, the absence of a provider of unconventional love and esteem, is one of the deepest wounds to a person's soul.

 

[gomenasai]

Yes, if your emotional needs were never met in your childhood, you will have some serious problems later on.

 

[nopride86]

Truly, my main desire to ctb stems from my family. They aren't outright abusive, but their very presence in my life means that I will never have a happy present or future.
I've tried to heal so much from their emotional in*cest and bizarre worldviews which shaped my life, but I'll never recover. Even if they dropped dead tomorrow, too much has already been lost.

My mom was a therapist, claims to be the patron saint of mental health even though she's one of the most fucked up people I've ever met. I'm so glad she quit working after a few years, who knows the damage she could have caused to vulnerable people. The other day, and multiple times throughout my life, she told me that people who fail their ctb attempts were just attention seekers, that if they really wanted to die they would have. What a c*nt.
That's the only thing that drives me now, to have a successful attempt to throw her words right in her face. One successful attempt to prove just how far I'd go to get away from her.

 

[Obliviate]

Same.

 

[LittleJem]

The abortion I had was hands down the best decision of my life. I will never ever regret it.

Me too. I would have been a terrible mother and if they inherited my mental illness they would be cursed.

Dogs are bred (when pedigree) with more thought than humans.

 

[Orchidia]

I am so fuckin annoyed at life, i used to be really smart, but my parents never set limits to me so i became a mess. I really hate how you become shit if you dont get proper education

 

[gomenasai]

I am so fuckin annoyed at life, i used to be really smart, but my parents never set limits to me so i became a mess. I really hate how you become shit if you dont get proper education

Just because others perceive you as "shit", doesn't mean you are. If you think like them, then you're just the same as them.

 

[Pluto]

While I don't agree with attacking all parents indiscriminately, mine are true demons. Worst of all, they appeared respectable to outsiders. No alcoholism or violence. I had no way of asking for help, or even knowing that anything was wrong since I knew no different.

My mother was a hardline misogynist and wanted a boy, only getting one on the third try. That left me with 2 unloved older sisters who wanted me dead (40 years later our relationships are still in ruins) and tormented me for my inferior gender at every opportunity. To this day I have never had a proper relationship and am now dealing with issues of impotence and ageing alone.

My mother had already decided what talents and interests I would have from birth, which led to pushing me hard towards things I had no interest in, then giving up on me when it became clear I had passions of my own. I was then forced to see a psychologist and take on demeaning labels like 'schizoid', after which I was treated like an animal in a zoo whose PTSD behaviour was a source of entertainment. I also remember her laughing at me when I was severely depressed with a comment like, "Ooh, he's got his angry face on today."

My father was worse. He had had a harsh childhood involving abandonment in a boarding school and bullying, leaving him with narcissistic personality disorder. Because I was young and powerless, it was Nfather's time to have revenge. He played the game of feigning innocence and confusion to outsiders, while artfully neglecting and belittling me, as well as tacitly encouraging the others to ramp up their abuse. He was a death fetishist and I eventually realised he wanted to watch me suffer and die, but if I tried to voice this I would be attacked and branded a lunatic because he was so esteemed in the community.

It climaxed when I failed to finish high school due to endless bullying at school and home. I had been brainwashed into thinking I was incapable of working or socialising. My only companion was our sweet kitty who loved to curl up beside me (yes, that's where the whole cat thing comes from). A friend used the metaphor that it was like me being chained up in a basement while the family took their turns in whipping me.

The reason I am so passionate about trying to help others here is I truly wish nobody had to go through this, especially when it is so hard to ever take back one's own life in the aftermath.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

I do not forgive my parents for hurting me when I was younger even if our relationship is "mended" now (they never apologized as far as I can remember). I still feel like I'm infantilized and powerless living under their roof yet I am hopelessly dependent on them. I hate this and I want to leave life.

 

[Yakamoz]

My parents destroyed my life
They can go to hell

Amen to this

 

[SectOfValtiel]

Its funny
My sister was talking to my mom about it, specifically she was talking about a time she'd told her that if she ever came out as gay, she'd slap her right there
Apparently my mom replied "oh, I dont think it was ever *that* bad"


Ive been outted as bi since and I guess shes changed a lot because she didnt really care, but still
The fact she ever said that- and then denied it later?
I feel like parents, especially from that generation, just flat out do not know how much damage they can cause
Younger generations have access to more research and so know exactly what kind of life-altering harm was done to them, but parents always seem to just refuse to accept it was really their fault

In my case, my dad was verbally and occasionally physically abusive so he was really the one to blame
But my mom didnt really defend us against him, either
She would leave and go shopping for long periods of time so wed be stuck dealing with it ourselves
Yeah, she'd kick him out sometimes, but until high school for me, he was always back and pretending like nothing was wrong

Idk
I love my mom but a good mother she definitely isnt
I'd even bet money she doesnt really care what happens to me
Thats kinda funny, too

 

[almaranthine]

Me too. I would have been a terrible mother and if they inherited my mental illness they would be cursed.

Dogs are bred (when pedigree) with more thought than humans.

So many people out there are vehemently against abortion, even to the extent of believing it is "murder". Yet it is usually done out of mercy and respect for the unborn life. There are plenty of women who just don't want kids, don't want to "ruin" their bodies, and other seemingly selfish reasons but at the end of the day even they have the self awareness to know that they wouldn't be good mothers and spare the life. How it is viewed as this horrible thing when people are quite literally sparing others from an existence of suffering baffles me. You're so right about the dogs. So many humans just obliviously bring life into this world with no real thought, no plan, no means, or even worse they do it in spite of knowing the child could end up with horrible conditions and disabilities... yet women who have abortions are "evil". If that's the case, fine, I'm happy to be a villain that spared a child from living a cursed life.

 

[Freebird4567]

Mine too, yet people will still say 'but they're your family' so I deserved to be abused and told as a child I wasn't wanted and that she wished she left me in the hospital

 

[makethepainstop]

So many people out there are vehemently against abortion, even to the extent of believing it is "murder". Yet it is usually done out of mercy and respect for the unborn life. There are plenty of women who just don't want kids, don't want to "ruin" their bodies, and other seemingly selfish reasons but at the end of the day even they have the self awareness to know that they wouldn't be good mothers and spare the life. How it is viewed as this horrible thing when people are quite literally sparing others from an existence of suffering baffles me. You're so right about the dogs. So many humans just obliviously bring life into this world with no real thought, no plan, no means, or even worse they do it in spite of knowing the child could end up with horrible conditions and disabilities... yet women who have abortions are "evil". If that's the case, fine, I'm happy to be a villain that spared a child from living a cursed life.

You are so right, I would never want to bring a kid into this wretched world.

 

[Efilismislife]

Guess i add my experience/story to the list

My parents, family was the only one in the world that hurt me the most
theyre the root of all my sufferings and every good things that robbed from me

I got taken away by my evil family since 6-7 before that i was really great

After being taken they destroyed me physically, mentally got worse by the time.
Physically&mentally abusive, threaten me, etc
until im broken ruined sick alone
Suffering everyday because of them
Big pile of troubles that i have to deal with everyday all my life all caused by them

i cant do things that i like/makes me happy, have to sacrifice myself have to do things that tortures me. Cant have a life

Hopeless and helpless