Venting My opinion doesn't matter (thread about autism)

[DoNotLet2]

Hello
This is venting so I warn you I'm not going to be nice or polite. I'm not trying to insult anyone in particular so please don't feel insulted if I say something you think is about you.

Sooo hell yeah. My opinion doesn't matter. I'm a person with autism (yes WITH AUTISM not AUTISTIC though I won't be angry if someone calls me autistic) but not a typical case of that disorder (yes disorder for fucks sake). I do not experience sensory difficulties (at least I think so) so I'm not going to fall into a tantrum caused by over stimulation. But I do suffer from autism greatly. My natural social skills are at the level of zero and I have to work really fucking hard to have any kind of a relationship. BUT THERE IS JUST ONE RIGHT IMAGE OF AUTISM IN THE MEDIA. If you don't have sensory difficulties you're not considered a person with autism 'cause no.
I'm ostracized away from the autistic community ONLY BECAUSE my views aren't really leftish but rather centrist. I'm absolutely pro tolerance and pro for a society where you can feel safe and fine despite your differences from the norm. But I'm not going to blindly accept anything! IS THIS THE TOLERANCE THE LEFT IS FIGHTING FOR?!!! A "TOLERANCE" IN WHICH YOU GET OSTRACIZED FOR HAVING A SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT OPINION?!!! Fuck that world! I feel like there is no place for me in this world. My opinion doesn't matter just because it's different.
WHY DON'T I MATTER? WHAT DID I DO WRONG?!!

 

[lugerepair]

So...I'm autistic, and a leftist. It's a common misconception that the left is "tolerant". "Tolerance" isn't a defining virtue of the left. We are very intolerant of certain forms of intolerance (look up the paradox of tolerance). We are also intolerant of bigotry. We are intolerant of injustice. We are intolerant of many things. Left vs right isn't about how tolerant you are or aren't. It's about what you're willing to tolerate.

Edit: Anyway, sorry, did the autistic thing of correcting surface factual errors rather than addressing the overall gist of the message.

There are people who agree with you within the autistic community. I know because I've come across them many times. So if what you want is to find people who agree with you and your politics, they are out there. But autistic people in general are very passionate about social justice issues, so if you are vocal and outspoken about preferring person-first language and the medical model of disability, people will be in turn very vocal and outspoken about disagreeing with you.

 

[DoNotLet2]

So...I'm autistic, and a leftist. It's a common misconception that the left is "tolerant". "Tolerance" isn't a defining virtue of the left. We are very intolerant of certain forms of intolerance (look up the paradox of tolerance). We are also intolerant of bigotry. We are intolerant of injustice. We are intolerant of many things. Left vs right isn't about how tolerant you are or aren't. It's about what you're willing to tolerate.

I foresaw that coming... This is going to get interesting.
First of all I'm not a fucking bigot I don't speak about trans and non binary people of all kinds.

Second of all I no longer believe in that misconception I think that LEFT=RIGHT.
So what? Do you think I deserve to be fucking ostracized only because I have a slightly different opinion that doesn't hurt anyone? It's not like I'm pro hate no no no I'm pro love and acceptance I'm just not going to blindly accept every idea that comes from the left.

 

[lugerepair]

I foresaw that coming... This is going to get interesting.
First of all I'm not a fucking bigot I don't speak about trans and non binary people of all kinds.

Second of all I no longer believe in that misconception I think that LEFT=RIGHT.
So what? Do you think I deserve to be fucking ostracized only because I have a slightly different opinion that doesn't hurt anyone? It's not like I'm pro hate no no no I'm pro love and acceptance I'm just not going to blindly accept every idea that comes from the left.

Ok that's fine. I added a second part to my last comment by the way, did you see it?

I wasn't suggesting that you're a bigot. I'm more so responding to the claim that the left is supposed to be tolerant, which I disagree with, but like I said, this was me doing the autistic thing of correcting surface factual errors rather than addressing the overall gist of the message.

Anyway, I don't want to get into an argument with you. Unless you think it would be cathartic and helpful for you. But if you're here you're probably feeling down already and I don't want to contribute to that.

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

"Suicide discussion"

 

[DoNotLet2]

There are people who agree with you within the autistic community. I know because I've come across them many times. So if what you want is to find people who agree with you and your politics, they are out there. But autistic people in general are very passionate about social justice issues, so if you are vocal and outspoken about preferring person-first language and the medical model of disability, people will be in turn very vocal and outspoken about disagreeing with you.

No no no no. I'm not against social model of disability no no no. I'm more venting about other opinions on autism. And this isn't just hard disagreement I was literally BANNED OUT OF THE AUTISTIC-FRIENDLY SPACE.

Anyway, I don't want to get into an argument with you. Unless you think it would be cathartic and helpful for you. But if you're here you're probably feeling down already and I don't want to contribute to that.

I don't want to argue I want to vent.

"Suicide discussion"

This is venting and it belongs to the suicide discussion. And yes this is one of the reasons I want to kill myself. Being ostracized for no reason.

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

This is venting and it belongs to the suicide discussion. And yes this is one of the reasons I want to kill myself. Being ostracized for no reason.

Makes sense, thanks.

 

[DoNotLet2]

@lugerepair
Ehhh I don't want to say what this was about but it wasn't a political argument though it could be pointed politically if someone wanted very much. Everybody was against me no one stood in my defense.

 

[lugerepair]

@lugerepair
Ehhh I don't want to say what this was about but it wasn't a political argument though it could be pointed politically if someone wanted very much. Everybody was against me no one stood in my defense.

It's called getting dogpiled. It happened to me once. Got banned from a group I liked. My opinion wasn't even that controversial or bad, but everyone decided to gang up on me. Anyway, it affected me deeply, it was very uncool. So I can empathize.

 

[DoNotLet2]

It's called getting dogpiled. It happened to me once. Got banned from a group I liked. My opinion wasn't even that controversial or bad, but everyone decided to gang up on me. Anyway, it affected me deeply, it was very uncool. So I can empathize.

Thank you <3
And yes that's the reason I lost faith in autistic community.

 

[nasblue]

I'm in a similar situation, my older brothers have been officially diagnosed with Asperger's but in my case they dismissed it in favor of social anxiety. I think that's bullshit. After years of trying to live ,,normally" I've realized that it just isn't for me, most people are nothing but an annoyance to me and cause sensory overload. I am glad for my few good friends though who also have a bit of an autistic streak.
I would disagree that most people like us are leftist. Maybe in American SJW circles but my friends from Europe and Russia are very critical of postmodern ideology and mainstream leftism.

 

[BluesRunTheGame]

I doubt they are properly left-wing; more likely they are virtue signalers. I am left-wing and believe in the redistribution of wealth but I can't stand the mainstream rhetoric or nanny state organisations like the Scottish National Party, for instance.

But yeah politics aside... I have OCD (one reason for being suicidal) and my latest obsession is that I have autism too but I won't ever be able to find out if this is the case.

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

You should avoid the aspergers subreddit then, if you don't like that sort of discourse. I'm sorry to hear that you're having this experience with other people in the autism community, I've had similar problems. Imagine that, being too autistic for all the autism websites and groups. I must have super autism.

Wrong Planet was an autism forum that used to be pretty active and full of a lot more older people who aren't so reactionary, but I don't know if that site is still around nowadays. Don't feel bad about not fitting in with other autistic people, I don't either. I'm 21 and rarely relate to others in my age group.

There's a lot of debates about using person first language and social versus medical models of disability, and like you say, there's usually no contesting the dominant viewpoint. I have found that a lot of people in autism groups online seem to have very specific symptoms and are intolerant of autistic people who suffer in a different way.

I have dehabilitating sensory issues for instance, many issues with speech as well, and people who would be considered extremely high functioning would shit on me and say that autism isn't a disability, it's part of their personality, and that anyone who views autism as an affliction rather than a gift is just moping and internalising ableism. Sure that's their experience, but it certainly isn't like that for every person with autism.

Trying to stay apolitical here, but I consider myself quite left leaning and I would say a lot of left leaning people are intolerant and use very loaded, emotional language when debating, so don't take it personal, fighting on the Internet especially about politics is about as common as breathing. Don't let it get to you.

 

[lugerepair]

people who would be considered extremely high functioning would shit on me and say that autism isn't a disability

Most people in the autistic community do see autism as a disability. But disability =/= affliction if you catch my drift. Anyway I do get annoyed when people minimize the impact of autism, or when autistic people brag about how successful they are "thanks to their autism" or something. Kinda makes me feel like a failure. I mean, I don't like the narrative that autism is an affliction or "something wrong with you", but I also don't like the narrative that it's this amazing gift that makes you special and wonderful. It's just...the way some people are, and because it's a minority of us, society isn't adapted to us, and that can suck big time. Also kinda makes me feel like shit when I see other autistic people having friends, jobs, achieving a relative amount of success. Makes me wonder what the fuck must be wrong with me, in addition to the autism, that I can't consistently do the same things. Or maybe my autism is just...worse than theirs, or something. Anyway it makes me mad. Like wow congrats you have all these friends, and you're so socially adept, and you're somehow autistic? I don't know. Seems sus. But I'm not gonna go around calling other people fake autistics just because I'm envious. It's "a spectrum" as they say. Perhaps I just got the short end of the stick in the "social competence" area.

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

Most people in the autistic community do see autism as a disability. But disability =/= affliction if you catch my drift. Anyway I do get annoyed when people minimize the impact of autism, or when autistic people brag about how successful they are "thanks to their autism" or something. Kinda makes me feel like a failure. I mean, I don't like the narrative that autism is an affliction or "something wrong with you", but I also don't like the narrative that it's this amazing gift that makes you special and wonderful. It's just...the way some people are, and because it's a minority of us, society isn't adapted to us, and that can suck big time. Also kinda makes me feel like shit when I see other autistic people having friends, jobs, achieving a relative amount of success. Makes me wonder what the fuck must be wrong with me, in addition to the autism, that I can't consistently do the same things. Or maybe my autism is just...worse than theirs, or something. Anyway it makes me mad. Like wow congrats you have all these friends, and you're so socially adept, and you're somehow autistic? I don't know. Seems sus. But I'm not gonna go around calling other people fake autistics just because I'm envious. It's "a spectrum" as they say. Perhaps I just got the short end of the stick in the "social competence" area.

The whole, "we must have special talents" thing is like some Sheldon Cooper Big bang theory meme stereotype and I don't know why they keep telling us this as if it is helpful to people like me and you who didn't get the sacred autism savant talents.

Do you know of Temple Grandin? A lot of other autistic people admire her because she is gifted with animals and developing new agricultural methods and epistemologies. However, she believes autistic people who are not like her-those who don't specialised talent that make them an asset in the workforce- should not exist. It's disgusting.

I find it quite puzzling as well that people latch onto that idea that autism makes you gifted, special, and unique. Like you, I want whatever flavor of autism they're having. Not the, I can't tolerate lots of textures, sounds, and stimuli, alongside being totally incompetent socially and having little control over how I can speak and articulate myself, kind of autism.

 

[lugerepair]

The whole, "we must have special talents" thing is like some Sheldon Cooper Big bang theory meme stereotype and I don't know why they keep telling us this as if it is helpful to people like me and you who didn't get the sacred autism savant talents.

Do you know of Temple Grandin? A lot of other autistic people admire her because she is gifted with animals and developing new agricultural methods and epistemologies. However, she believes autistic people who are not like her-those who don't specialised talent that make them an asset in the workforce- should not exist. It's disgusting.

I find it quite puzzling as well that people latch onto that idea that autism makes you gifted, special, and unique. Like you, I want whatever flavor of autism they're having. Not the, I can't tolerate lots of textures, sounds, and stimuli, alongside being totally incompetent socially and having little control over how I can speak and articulate myself, kind of autism.

I have heard of Temple Grandin. Not a big fan of her either. I hate this sort of eugenics talk.

I think people latch onto the idea that autism makes you gifted, special, etc. because of magical thinking. People want to believe that for every bad thing that happens there is an equivalent good thing that happens. That for every impairment, there is an equal and equivalent gift. They think there is a sort of cosmic justice. They don't want to believe that there is no justice, that the universe doesn't give a fuck. Also, society only values autistic people when it can get something from us. They like us when we invent cool stuff, when we can be exploited for profit, etc. If we're not exploitable, then we are to be pitied, and hopefully cured.

I mean sure, some autistic people have amazing gifts (some neurotypicals do too). I'm not one of those people. I'm not a savant. I don't even have an especially good memory. I don't even maintain a special interest for long enough to really do anything useful with it. And like you, I have lots of sensory issues. They're actually getting worse with age for some reason. I went through autistic burnout a few years ago, and it somehow made my autism worse, or more obvious, and I've never fully recovered.

 

[DoNotLet2]

I would disagree that most people like us are leftist. Maybe in American SJW circles but my friends from Europe and Russia are very critical of postmodern ideology and mainstream leftism.

I doubt they are properly left-wing; more likely they are virtue signalers. I am left-wing and believe in the redistribution of wealth but I can't stand the mainstream rhetoric or nanny state organisations like the Scottish National Party, for instance.

Ok ok ok you guys are right and I'm wrong but that's not the main topic of the discussion.

Anyway I do get annoyed when people minimize the impact of autism, or when autistic people brag about how successful they are "thanks to their autism" or something. Kinda makes me feel like a failure. I mean, I don't like the narrative that autism is an affliction or "something wrong with you", but I also don't like the narrative that it's this amazing gift that makes you special and wonderful. It's just...the way some people are, and because it's a minority of us, society isn't adapted to us, and that can suck big time. Also kinda makes me feel like shit when I see other autistic people having friends, jobs, achieving a relative amount of success. Makes me wonder what the fuck must be wrong with me, in addition to the autism, that I can't consistently do the same things.

Yessss fucking strong agree.

If we're not exploitable, then we are to be pitied, and hopefully cured.

I want to be cured for my own sake. You guys mentioned that autism is hard to live with and that's why I don't want it but autistic community considers me to be a bitch because of that.

FUCK THAT. I DON'T WANT TO BE AUTISTIC/HAVE AUTISM. So what?! Is autistic community okay with abuse? Is it okay to insult someone for no reason?! If yes I don't want to be a such person! I don't want to be an abuser! Well I'd love to hear other opinion that the autistic community isn't okay with abuse. But I guess I won't hear so.