Suicideisnirvana
Specialist
- Aug 4, 2018
- 312
Gevatsu
Weak
- Jul 15, 2018
- 66
I'm 17 so I can't. I don't plan on being here past 18. I'm not going to work so I'll have no income. The home I'm in isn't bad at all, I'm actually in a good living situation but I still plan on offing myself. I feel like August is the month I depart this place.
Gevatsu
Weak
- Jul 15, 2018
- 66
True. Now I have to be extra cautious since I have SN and stuff in the closet.
Gevatsu
Weak
- Jul 15, 2018
- 66
"Fine, I'm selfish but I'm your fucking mother and you're not going to die!" She said something like that. She said that I have to stay away from forums like these. I told her I find peace and happiness in death..she says I need help!
Well mom, I don't want to be a wage slave and my future honestly isn't going to be great. Society wants you to work, that's all you're worth here. Even if I became successful it's still pointless. I don't want to be here!
Rocky M
I'm A Monster
- Jun 20, 2018
- 213
I'm so sorry that you're going through this right now. I hope your mom realizes that you didn't have a choice coming into this world, so she should at least give you the choice to leave it.
The relatives of a suicide hold it against him that out of consideration for their reputation he did not remain alive.
Friedrich Nietzsche
Friedrich Nietzsche
Brokenanddeadinside
Arcanist
- Aug 8, 2018
- 403
Ya I cant stand that you dont ask to be brought into this world then people say its selfish to kill yourself. No its selfish to expect someone that is miserable and doesnt want to remain on this earth to stay alive just so you dont feel pain. We all die and whether we die now or how ever many years from now it all ends up the same. I never want to have kids because I refuse to bring a life into this shitty world and if I ever did want a kid I would adopt because I rather give a kid a good life that doesnt have one then to bring another life into this shitty world.
Refuse the "meds" until they say you will go to the psych ward if you don't and then fake take them and act happy. It is a many long process to get your watchers to give you enough freedom to create enough of a time slot to go to a place with no people and an expectation of a lot of time in that setting.
It is only a hypothetical. Just saying that I can see where she is coming from even if I disagree with her. If I were in her situation I hope I wouldn't make the same choices she has.
I guess i am gonna disagree with all of you on this subject. How can someone expect their mother to let their child kill themself. "Its selfish to force someone to live" you are gonna say. And yes its definitly selfish but she is not your highschool friend she is your mother.
One of the things that I hate of being human and existing is being assigned to a certain Family, Group or Society without your consent that will later feel entitled to control you, tell you how you should behave, how you should dress, if your sexuality is normal ( being gay in usa for example) or a mental illness and a crime (saudi arabia), in what religion you should believe and other nonsense.
Just let me be a sovereign/independent entity. I don't care about your god damn rules or beliefs, I'm not anyone's toy for fuck sake. I HAVE A PERSONALITY. I didn't choose to be born, mom! And I didn't choose you to be my mom!
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I'm so sorry. I'm not an antinatalist per se, but when I hear stuff like this I can't help but reconsider. I can't tell whether your mom is being really loving or really selfish.
You should consider purchasing a safe. Not just for methods but your other private stuff. She sounds a bit controlling.
Gevatsu
Weak
- Jul 15, 2018
- 66
If I had the money to, I would, but having a safe would make it more suspicious. I've hidden it pretty well now so the chances of her finding it are slim.
deflagrat
¡Si hablas español mándame un mensaje privado!
- Apr 9, 2018
- 360
Your mother probably has a normal psychology, which is why she thinks dying is a really bad decision. That's normal, I would give her time to accept the idea before you actually go through with it. You are very young, you should try antidepressants before making your final jump. Have in mind that if you don't kill yourself eventually you may feel like you want to give life a try, and if you are intellectually above average, you will be able to continue with your life.
Just think if resolving your issues is worth it, it may be, even if it doesn't feel that way now. I say this because of your age, if you were 30 I would assume you have done that already.
Just think if resolving your issues is worth it, it may be, even if it doesn't feel that way now. I say this because of your age, if you were 30 I would assume you have done that already.
Gevatsu
Weak
- Jul 15, 2018
- 66
I've taken antidepressants before and they did nothing. I honestly don't want help. I like the way I am. If I don't kill myself now, I'll kill myself later. It's inevitable.
I've wanted to ctb for about 9 years now. The only reason I'm still here is because I failed all of my attempts and the methods weren't very lethal. I needed to do something, even though I knew it wouldn't work.
I'm thankful I found this forum. This places gives me the knowledge that I needed to not fail and methods I've never even thought of.
I find peace and happiness when I think of death and I don't want to live like a zombie on meds. To have two selves. I like the way I am and I'm glad I know I can escape this world. I'm young, that's true, but that doesn't mean I'll change my mind down the road. My only goal in life is to off myself, it makes everything else meaningless. I like it that way. Life, in my opinion, isn't worth living. It's meaningless. You have to find a meaning to life. I don't want a meaning.
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