Venting My friend doesn't understand sh at all

[suicidal_tendencies]

Today I showed the cuts on my arm to my best friend. He asked why I do it and I said, that I am scared of the future and I listened to some songs about cutting and wanted to try it out (which is actually the case). Then he said like, why don't stop cutting yourself. And I said, it's an addiction and I don't know if I want to stop. And he replyed, I should just stop cutting and, like, he knows I can do it. I said, it's like with cigarettes this kind of addiction, to explain my situation. He insisted on the idea of "just stopping" to cut myself.
Like, what the actual fuck do you expect from me? I thought you were my friend and help me to stop cutting myself by having a meaningful conversation with me and bringing constructive arguments. But no, you had to look down on me once again, thinking I would follow your "advice" and leaving me alone like you've done it when I was more suicidal than now and actually barely killed myself.
And now I only have two male friends left, with whom I can try to talk about this topic. At least I have a female friend, with which I can talk about really everything, without either her judging me or me judging her. I think females not just talk more openly about everything with their friends, but also more empathetically. Hopefully I have the courage to kill myself before vocational school begins.

 

[getoutgirl]

If I understand this right you just started cutting no? Like you wanted to try it out.
If so I don't think it is at the point of addiction yet. It could. I don't know how your experience was with it, but if it is like mine and other people for whom it can in fact very much relieve stress momentarely and feel good, then it can turn into habit, and an addiction with escalating intensity.

It's a not great coping mechanism. Doesn't solve anything past that present moment, and usually it makes your mental health shittier if you engage with it repeatedly. Sometimes when you are so overwhelmed you turn to it, and there is no judging there, it sucks but whatever saves you in that moment if it gets real bad.
I cannot recommend at all you keep at it tho :/
Not saying like your friend "lol just stop" but also true that if you just started (and I didn't get that wrong) then now it is the easiest for you to do so. I get how you don't know if you want to stop, that's fine. You can try it, you can also understand how it works and try other stuff too, then see.

If you want a primary explanation of how sh works with some alternatives, distractions and ways to cope with it the site has a good one. + taking care of the wounds, important. Maybe this helps you in a way your friend couldn't.

Self Harm Resources

This post is written by @Dot, I am just the messenger Self Harm It's known that there are many users on the forum who self harm for different reasons. This thread is focused mostly on habitual or impulsive/physical self harm. This thread has not been made for any glorification of self harm...

sanctioned-suicide.net

I'm also sorry about your friend. I think he had good intentions, but a lot or most people just don't know how to deal with self harm or how it works, similar to suicidality, or depression, or lots of stuff they thankfully don't have to deal with. So it sucks for you, but maybe you can learn about it and explain it to your other friends better too.

To end the mini rant, real sorry you are suicidal and doing not-great at all at the moment if you are trying this things out :(
I do hope regardless of what you do that you get some easier days your way. Big hugs <3

 

[suicidal_tendencies]

If I understand this right you just started cutting no? Like you wanted to try it out.
If so I don't think it is at the point of addiction yet. It could. I don't know how your experience was with it, but if it is like mine and other people for whom it can in fact very much relieve stress momentarely and feel good, then it can turn into habit, and an addiction with escalating intensity.

It's a not great coping mechanism. Doesn't solve anything past that present moment, and usually it makes your mental health shittier if you engage with it repeatedly. Sometimes when you are so overwhelmed you turn to it, and there is no judging there, it sucks but whatever saves you in that moment if it gets real bad.
I cannot recommend at all you keep at it tho :/
Not saying like your friend "lol just stop" but also true that if you just started (and I didn't get that wrong) then now it is the easiest for you to do so. I get how you don't know if you want to stop, that's fine. You can try it, you can also understand how it works and try other stuff too, then see.

If you want a primary explanation of how sh works with some alternatives, distractions and ways to cope with it the site has a good one. + taking care of the wounds, important. Maybe this helps you in a way your friend couldn't.

Self Harm Resources

This post is written by @Dot, I am just the messenger Self Harm It's known that there are many users on the forum who self harm for different reasons. This thread is focused mostly on habitual or impulsive/physical self harm. This thread has not been made for any glorification of self harm...

sanctioned-suicide.net

I'm also sorry about your friend. I think he had good intentions, but a lot or most people just don't know how to deal with self harm or how it works, similar to suicidality, or depression, or lots of stuff they thankfully don't have to deal with. So it sucks for you, but maybe you can learn about it and explain it to your other friends better too.

To end the mini rant, real sorry you are suicidal and doing not-great at all at the moment if you are trying this things out :(
I do hope regardless of what you do that you get some easier days your way. Big hugs <3

thanks, maybe I should try coping in another way, but it's still healthier at the moment than alcohol or drugs. And I don't ever want to do drugs, so this is fine at the moment i guess. But guess, I should quit soon, if I don't want it to become a habit