My first «attempt»

[HansaNull]

After weeks of barely sleeping, and also trying to stay sober, my common sense failed me. I bought me some alcohol and went home to drink myself to sleep.
When the alcohol failed me, my next instinct was to go look in the medicine cabinet. I found and took an excessive amount of quetiapine since i've had experience feeling drowsy after taking it. Also I continued drinking.

After a while i started getting side effects. My heart was beating irregularly, my breathing slowed/stopped sometimes and i got really anxious. I was jumping in and out of consciousness. So i called EMS and got sent to the nearest hospital.

My medical records says «suicide attempt» and «admission with suicidal tendencies». I would agree if i really tried to take my own life, but i just wanted some damn sleep.

Laugh all you want, i know its pathetic

 

[hurb]

genuine question , was that going to kill u or was it just going to be painful?

 

[HansaNull]

genuine question , was that going to kill u or was it just going to be painful?

That amount was poisonous, but not life threatening as far as i understand. But the shame made me wish it was.

 

[hurb]

dont be ashamed for being human. we all have our vulnerable moments, if anything (specially if u r not suicidal) it was ur body asking u to look deep within. maybe u r lonely or smthg , try to think of it as a warning rather than an embarrassing memory

 

[HansaNull]

dont be ashamed for being human. we all have our vulnerable moments, if anything (specially if u r not suicidal) it was ur body asking u to look deep within. maybe u r lonely or smthg , try to think of it as a warning rather than an embarrassing memory

I'm not embarrassed about the «attempt» itself, i don't care how people view me. How it impacts my family however, i'm so sorry for them. I don't want them to always be on edge. As for my own ctb, i would want to plan it more carefully before attempting anyways.

 

[systemic_livestock]

None of that was pathetic just by being here we all kinda deserve sympathy life is miserable and we all deserve a break but at a certain point it seems to only be available with permanent sleep. I wish you luck in recovery or you're ctb <3

 

[doomedbynarrative]

You are not pathetic but yeesh they didn't even think to ask you after you got stabilized at the hospital before even slapping that label on it? I'm sorry you had to go through all that.