Venting My final week

[traingirl]

Well, this is it. My final week (hopefully) on planet Earth. I'm nervous but I feel a sense of relief knowing that all my worries will soon be gone. I haven't been sleeping because of nervousness and excitement. I can't go to the psych ward so I have to make this count. I'm jumping off a bridge but I'm not disclosing the bridge in case there are any lurkers on here. Yes, I picked one of the most terrifying methods but at least I know I'll be dead. I don't have it in me to fight anymore or deal with the bullshit that this life brings. You can say goodbye or wish me luck. I'll still be active until next Saturday. Thank you all for being a place I could go to when I need judgement free support that my irl friends would take me to the psych ward for. Love you all Sasu fam.

 

[d4isy]

love you too and wish you peace

 

[eternalpace]

I hope you find peace.

 

[User111885]

I'm sorry you're sad. I am sad too!


I read your other post, that your mom died and you have been depressed and unable to get a job, but have a degree.

Have you tried ketamine? Mushrooms (if legal)? Unconventional things?

Your situation sounds like depression and response to grief and possibly an okay situation if you can find a way to beat the depression back long enough to get a job.

Are you able to take up running? I know most depressed people can't.

I know you are on lots of psych meds. For some people, they are supposedly helpful, but for some they do worsen things.

I feel bad about this, it sounds like you just have really bad major depressive disorder and psychological trauma but otherwise are a healthy possibly somewhat young woman with a degree in a difficult economy

 

[itsgone2]

. I'm jumping off a bridge but I'm not disclosing the bridge in case there are any lurkers on here

Are you taking anything before jumping to help with nerves?
I will miss you, but want you to be happy. I want to go so badly too, so I understand

 

[User111885]

I hope you at least try ketamine infusions before any attempt.

I am not a pro-lifer and hate psych wards. I try to avoid them myself.

 

[traingirl]

Are you taking anything before jumping to help with nerves?
I will miss you, but want you to be happy. I want to go so badly too, so I understand

Going to be drinking and possibly taking propranolol I don't have any benzos

 

[Ladyybugged]

hope you have a peaceful departure <3

 

[traingirl]

I hope you at least try ketamine infusions before any attempt.

I am not a pro-lifer and hate psych wards. I try to avoid them myself.

I don't have access to them because of cost and my dad doesn't want me to do them.

 

[eggsausagerice]

good luck girl. i'll miss seeing you around, i've been reading your posts. the world hasn't been kind to either of us.

 

[TheEndIsPeace]

I am sorry that this shitty world has hurt you. I wish you a peaceful departure and may eternal peace encompass you.

 

[User111885]

I don't have access to them because of cost and my dad doesn't want me to do them.

Okay, I wish I could just be wanting you to find peace and relief, but as much as im a pro-choice person, it seems unfortunate to end this when you might be able to get hired within a year. This really seems more like it would be a tragic, rather than understandable or appropriate, suicide.

Have you had a major depressive episode before or is this your first one?

You shouldn't give out personal details like what degree you have. Im not a pro-lifer, but pro-life people can be liars. I wish I knew what degree it was, however, but you shouldn't mention it.in a world without prolifers or involuntary commitment, i would like to know what degree you have.

 

[mrk´]

Good luck with anything that you decide to do traingirl!

 

[User111885]

Maybe something will change this week and you'll end up feeling better. I hope so...

 

[traingirl]

Maybe something will change this week and you'll end up feeling better. I hope so...

I don't think so.. I've felt like this for awhile.

 

[tiltedcompass]

Good luck. I hope that you find the peace you seek, and I'm sorry that the world wasn't kind to you.

 

[traingirl]

good luck girl. i'll miss seeing you around, i've been reading your posts. the world hasn't been kind to either of us.

I will miss you too thank you so much

Okay, I wish I could just be wanting you to find peace and relief, but as much as im a pro-choice person, it seems unfortunate to end this when you might be able to get hired within a year. This really seems more like it would be a tragic, rather than understandable or appropriate, suicide.

Have you had a major depressive episode before or is this your first one?

You shouldn't give out personal details like what degree you have. Im not a pro-lifer, but pro-life people can be liars. I wish I knew what degree it was, however, but you shouldn't mention it.in a world without prolifers or involuntary commitment, i would like to know what degree you have.

It's not really about a job. I've had depressive episodes before but this is my worst. My PMDD is intolerable, I don't sleep at night even with heavy duty sleep meds, I'm in physical and mental torment every day, and I never get any relief. I'm not interested in the merry-go-round of psych meds and psych wards. Tragic as it may be, it's what I want.

 

[Irisse]

I hope that you find peace and are free of your pain.

 

[Terrible_Life]

Well, this is it. My final week (hopefully) on planet Earth. I'm nervous but I feel a sense of relief knowing that all my worries will soon be gone. I haven't been sleeping because of nervousness and excitement. I can't go to the psych ward so I have to make this count. I'm jumping off a bridge but I'm not disclosing the bridge in case there are any lurkers on here. Yes, I picked one of the most terrifying methods but at least I know I'll be dead. I don't have it in me to fight anymore or deal with the bullshit that this life brings. You can say goodbye or wish me luck. I'll still be active until next Saturday. Thank you all for being a place I could go to when I need judgement free support that my irl friends would take me to the psych ward for. Love you all Sasu fam.

I wish you peace. I wish that all your pain and suffering will end.

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope you find the freedom you search for, I wish you the best.

 

[woodlandcreature]

I hope it is quick and you find peace <3

 

[Ch4in3dcr0w]

wishing u peace

 

[AuraByte]

Love you too, OP.

No matter what happens, you are loved.

 

[Markisloggingout]

Fly high. Get pissed out of your mind and then throw yourself off headfirst is my bet.

 

[Greasyhair]

I didn't have privilege to know you, but I wish you luck, and if there is place after this that we meet there.

 

[opiateinduced]

Good luck! I'm sure you have but please make sure it's high enough to go and go instant.

 

[traingirl]

Good luck! I'm sure you have but please make sure it's high enough to go and go instant.

Oh yeah it's plenty high enough lol

Fly high. Get pissed out of your mind and then throw yourself off headfirst is my bet.

I'm getting so fucking drunk lmao

 

[Exhausted-and-Alone]

I'm sorry that it has come to this, but no matter what happens I hope you find love and peace.

 

[Nightfoot]

Did you decide against KN? Jumping sounds terrifying.

 

[traingirl]

Did you decide against KN? Jumping sounds terrifying.

KN is my backup and I'm not sure it's gonna come in time. I don't have any Meto and it just seems really risky. I don't want to survive. I have to die.