lokabe82

lokabe82

To infinity and beyond
Jun 16, 2023
153
My car is the only place I can have a piece of mind these days. It's the only place that doesn't have any painful memories attached to it. I can spend hours here just.... existing because I can't do that anywhere else. My job beats me to the ground every single day with no remorse in sight. Every little thing is an emergency that I need to deal with right that second. 9 hours in a day is never enough to get done what I need to get done. When I'm at home, I'm living my life with the man I've been with since I was 19 years old. I'm still haunted by the fact that he married the woman who ruthlessly stalked us both for several years. After spending months to a year in court trying to get a peace order, hearing knocking at my front door at 1 am, people coming to my job to scope me out and staying until after the store was closed, and hiding in a hotel for weeks, he left one day. And he married her. I'm not even good enough to be his girlfriend.

Every day after work, I sit here for a very long time and think about the things that led me to this point. To the point where ctb is the only happy option for me. And that's the only thing that brings me a sliver of peace.
 
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Reactions: Praestat_Mori, thebookofdisquiet, NightshadeDreamer and 2 others
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,856
That really does sound so dreadful what you have to endure, it must be really tiring, I understand why you would feel relieved at the thought of finally being free from everything. But anyway best wishes.
 

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