My boyfriend got back with me and said I need to get help

[LittleMagician]

My bf (previously my ex for two days) said he is severely concerned about me and wants me to get better and that he will do anything in his power to help me get better, it seems sweet but I don't know how to tell him that I don't think it's possible. He knows I'm depressed but not to the extent.

 

[Stan Swiftie]

My bf (previously my ex for two days) said he is severely concerned about me and wants me to get better and that he will do anything in his power to help me get better, it seems sweet but I don't know how to tell him that I don't think it's possible. He knows I'm depressed but not to the extent.

You have a BF?
Someone who loves you?
I'm guessing he actually touches you?
Maybe hugs you, kisses you, and makes love to you?
And you still want to die?
Makes no sense to me.
That's all I ever wanted...
And now...
It's too late!

 

[other-ghost]

It's okay to feel like healing isn't possible right now, depression can make it feel completely out of reach. The fact that he wants to support you even if it's hard to believe in it yourself says a lot about how much he cares. Maybe you don't have to figure out the 'how' or 'if' right now. Could you let him be there for you, even in small ways? Sometimes just having someone sit with us in the going through this can make it feel a little less heavy. And if you're comfortable, sharing even a bit of what you're going through might help him understand better.

 

[lucyanne]

You have a BF?
Someone who loves you?
I'm guessing he actually touches you?
Maybe hugs you, kisses you, and makes love to you?
And you still want to die?
Makes no sense to me.
That's all I ever wanted...
And now...
It's too late!

Please stop projecting your issues on others, we get it your sad you get no sex.

 

[Forveleth]

You have a BF?
Someone who loves you?
I'm guessing he actually touches you?
Maybe hugs you, kisses you, and makes love to you?
And you still want to die?
Makes no sense to me.
That's all I ever wanted...
And now...
It's too late!

Everyone is in different circumstances. Just because something might make your life better does not mean those things work for someone else. Plenty of people with loving partners are still severely depressed.

 

[lucyanne]

My bf (previously my ex for two days) said he is severely concerned about me and wants me to get better and that he will do anything in his power to help me get better, it seems sweet but I don't know how to tell him that I don't think it's possible. He knows I'm depressed but not to the extent.

My wife has been invaluable support this last 8 years, I know i would not be here if not for them.
They have given me more support and love than I've known in my life before them.

I love my wife dearly but that doesn't change the trauma I carry, nor does it make me want to live.

So when I say I get it, I mean as far as anyone else can, it's hard to sit with the guilt, shame and self hate that comes from feeling like you are letting them down but if you are not living for you are you really living?

 

[Pale_Rider]

Very lucky people, but im not gonna hate.

What I am gonna do is recommend you tell him the full extent. Let him try to help you. Is there anything to lose?
I'm also a hypocrite cause I keep everything secret.

 

[LittleMagician]

You have a BF?
Someone who loves you?
I'm guessing he actually touches you?
Maybe hugs you, kisses you, and makes love to you?
And you still want to die?
Makes no sense to me.
That's all I ever wanted...
And now...
It's too late!

Maybe because my life's mission isn't to live for a man…this is a really strange thing to say and if you really want that it is super easy because men will literally date anyone as long as you're a female

It's okay to feel like healing isn't possible right now, depression can make it feel completely out of reach. The fact that he wants to support you even if it's hard to believe in it yourself says a lot about how much he cares. Maybe you don't have to figure out the 'how' or 'if' right now. Could you let him be there for you, even in small ways? Sometimes just having someone sit with us in the going through this can make it feel a little less heavy. And if you're comfortable, sharing even a bit of what you're going through might help him understand better.

I want him, he isn't like any other man I have encountered before but I have self destructive tendencies, I try and tell him about my depression and suicidal thoughts but he gets really upset and just wants to make them go away but they can't just go away because I have had them for years

My wife has been invaluable support this last 8 years, I know i would not be here if not for them.
They have given me more support and love than I've known in my life before them.

I love my wife dearly but that doesn't change the trauma I carry, nor does it make me want to live.

So when I say I get it, I mean as far as anyone else can, it's hard to sit with the guilt, shame and self hate that comes from feeling like you are letting them down but if you are not living for you are you really living?

This is extremely true and I'm glad your wife has been there for you

Very lucky people, but im not gonna hate.

What I am gonna do is recommend you tell him the full extent. Let him try to help you. Is there anything to lose?
I'm also a hypocrite cause I keep everything secret.

There is a lot to lose, I'm not trying to mentally fuck up another person who cares about me

 

[ElTopo]

And yet you felt that it was right to get back with him despite your situation. If you feel like there's no way of recovering (probably not true by the way) at least don't drag someone else down with you. I'm sorry if I'm this judgemental

 

[LittleMagician]

And yet you felt that it was right to get back with him despite your situation. If you feel like there's no way of recovering (probably not true by the way) at least don't drag someone else down with you. I'm sorry if I'm this judgemental

It's fine I understand where you're coming from, I'm not purposely dragging anyone down. It is hard to let go of someone you love and who wants to keep fighting for you regardless of your mental health and poor circumstances.

 

[Pale_Rider]

Maybe because my life's mission isn't to live for a man…this is a really strange thing to say and if you really want that it is super easy because men will literally date anyone as long as you're a female

I want him, he isn't like any other man I have encountered before but I have self destructive tendencies, I try and tell him about my depression and suicidal thoughts but he gets really upset and just wants to make them go away but they can't just go away because I have had them for years

This is extremely true and I'm glad your wife has been there for you

There is a lot to lose, I'm not trying to mentally fuck up another person who cares about me

I can respect that ideal.

 

[ElTopo]

It's fine I understand where you're coming from, I'm not purposely dragging anyone down. It is hard to let go of someone you love and who wants to keep fighting for you regardless of your mental health and poor circumstances.

I'm sure it's hard but you need to think about the fact that you're being dishonest about something crucial.

 

[LittleMagician]

I'm sure it's hard but you need to think about the fact that you're being dishonest about something crucial.

I was never dishonest about my mental health, it doesn't take a genius to look at me and realise something is severely wrong. I don't understand it either I cannot just let go because (albeit very rare) some people want to just keep fighting for you. I don't know why or what I did to deserve being fought for but I cannot just ignore that. He may eventually say that I am too much for him and if he does c'est la vie…I never forced or deceived anyone into loving me because I physically can't do it and I'm not desperate for love anyway

 

[Stan Swiftie]

Maybe because my life's mission isn't to live for a man…this is a really strange thing to say and if you really want that it is super easy because men will literally date anyone as long as you're a female

Not true for me. My standards are so high, the female I'm looking for was never created.
And if she was, she sure as hell wouldn't be with me.
But my life's mission is to live for a woman.
But I never found her & now it's too late...
So, this weekend... I'm out!

 

[LittleMagician]

Not true for me. My standards are so high, the female I'm looking for was never created.
And if she was, she sure as hell wouldn't be with me.
But my life's mission is to live for a woman.
But I never found her & now it's too late...
So, this weekend... I'm out!

c'est la vie

 

[Stan Swiftie]

And yet you felt that it was right to get back with him despite your situation. If you feel like there's no way of recovering (probably not true by the way) at least don't drag someone else down with you. I'm sorry if I'm this judgemental

It's funny, if I would've said this, a mod would've threatened me, because this is mean. It's true, but not very nice. Props.

c'est la vie

Lol.
Okay... I'm gonna tell you my philosophy on God's Defects.
Those of us with severe mental illnesses do NOT deserve to have a romantic relationship with ANYONE!
We deserve to live & die forever alone!
That's how God meant for our lives to be.
Break up with your poor unfortunate BF who you don't know how to love.
Cuz that's the thing...
GOD'S DEFECTS DON'T KNOW HOW TO LOVE!!!
THAT'S WHY WE DON'T DESERVE LOVE!!!
And "normal" people don't deserve the cancer that we are.
C'est la vie?
Yeah, it is what it is!

 

[LittleMagician]

It's funny, if I would've said this, a mod would've threatened me, because this is mean. It's true, but not very nice. Props.

Lol.
Okay... I'm gonna tell you my philosophy on God's Defects.
Those of us with severe mental illnesses do NOT deserve to have a romantic relationship with ANYONE!
We deserve to live & die forever alone!
That's how God meant for our lives to be.
Break up with your poor unfortunate BF who you don't know how to love.
Cuz that's the thing...
GOD'S DEFECTS DON'T KNOW HOW TO LOVE!!!
THAT'S WHY WE DON'T DESERVE LOVE!!!
And "normal" people don't deserve the cancer that we are.
C'est la vie?
Yeah, it is what it is!

*crickets*

 

[other-ghost]

I want him, he isn't like any other man I have encountered before but I have self destructive tendencies, I try and tell him about my depression and suicidal thoughts but he gets really upset and just wants to make them go away but they can't just go away because I have had them for years

It sounds like he rlly cares, but just fails to understand it..

That said, trust your gut. If his reactions ever make you feel pressured to 'perform' recovery, that's worth addressing. Sometimes love alone isn't enough to heal anyonr, and that's okay. Protect your boundaries. Whatever happens, You deserve that effort, even if it's hard to believe right now.

 

[LittleMagician]

Very eloquently explained <33

It sounds like he rlly cares, but just fails to understand it..

That said, trust your gut. If his reactions ever make you feel pressured to 'perform' recovery, that's worth addressing. Sometimes love alone isn't enough to heal anyonr, and that's okay. Protect your boundaries. Whatever happens, You deserve that effort, even if it's hard to believe right now.

 

[Worndown]

My bf (previously my ex for two days) said he is severely concerned about me and wants me to get better and that he will do anything in his power to help me get better, it seems sweet but I don't know how to tell him that I don't think it's possible. He knows I'm depressed but not to the extent.

He may need to know the details from your perspective. You see hopless, he does not.
Sit down and go through the problems as you see them.
He should tell you what he sees.
It is possible you overestimate the issues and he underestimates them.
You can discover ways to better handle this.

 

[lucyanne]

It's funny, if I would've said this, a mod would've threatened me, because this is mean. It's true, but not very nice. Props.

Lol.
Okay... I'm gonna tell you my philosophy on God's Defects.
Those of us with severe mental illnesses do NOT deserve to have a romantic relationship with ANYONE!
We deserve to live & die forever alone!
That's how God meant for our lives to be.
Break up with your poor unfortunate BF who you don't know how to love.
Cuz that's the thing...
GOD'S DEFECTS DON'T KNOW HOW TO LOVE!!!
THAT'S WHY WE DON'T DESERVE LOVE!!!
And "normal" people don't deserve the cancer that we are.
C'est la vie?
Yeah, it is what it is!

Ypu obviously are feeling emotive and hurting, but please stop attacking everyone else for YOUR issues, we still get it, sad incel sad and angry.

Just stop with fucking attacking people ffs

 

[Linda]

My bf (previously my ex for two days) said he is severely concerned about me and wants me to get better and that he will do anything in his power to help me get better, it seems sweet but I don't know how to tell him that I don't think it's possible. He knows I'm depressed but not to the extent.

If you don't tell him the truth, you will eventually have another breakup. That's guaranteed. If you do tell him, it might be more than he can cope with, in which case he would probably leave you, now or later. But if he can cope, he may well stick with you. Perhaps forever. I think your best option is to take the risk and be honest with him.

 

[LittleMagician]

If you don't tell him the truth, you will eventually have another breakup. That's guaranteed. If you do tell him, it might be more than he can cope with, in which case he would probably leave you, now or later. But if he can cope, he may well stick with you. Perhaps forever. I think your best option is to take the risk and be honest with him.

This is very true, it is a double edged sword and I think I am ready to face it head on

 

[lunar02102009]

I

You have a BF?
Someone who loves you?
I'm guessing he actually touches you?
Maybe hugs you, kisses you, and makes love to you?
And you still want to die?
Makes no sense to me.
That's all I ever wanted...
And now...
It's too late!

Understand you , i wish i still had her and she hadn't left me or at the very least i could have someone as good as her or better than her but it is what it is , gotta suffer! while she enjoys!

 

[BlueLock]

I'm sorry, i've been in that situation before and it feels awful as the person suffering with mental health problems. And it wasn't easy for my then-bf either, he was a lot like how your bf sounds- he tried to help me the best he could and was quite empathetic. But it got to be too much for him and he ended up ending things with me, and gave me the same parting words yours said to you now.

 

[bankai]

You have a BF?
Someone who loves you?
I'm guessing he actually touches you?
Maybe hugs you, kisses you, and makes love to you?
And you still want to die?
Makes no sense to me.
That's all I ever wanted...
And now...
It's too late!

Stan, please listen. It's a fantasy you've concocted.Relationships can be extremely hard. You're having this idea in your head that a relationship can save you. People can be quite selfish. They will leave you for no reason in particular. And they have a right to do that as well. If they're not happy in the relationship either, then they can leave you. So you can't really expect a relationship to save you. Also, if you give someone else that kind of power over you. It's a recipe for disaster. I've seen you post this a few Times Now.Just wanted to say my piece.

 

[Stan Swiftie]

Stan, please listen. It's a fantasy you've concocted.Relationships can be extremely hard. You're having this idea in your head that a relationship can save you. People can be quite selfish. They will leave you for no reason in particular. And they have a right to do that as well. If they're not happy in the relationship either, then they can leave you. So you can't really expect a relationship to save you. Also, if you give someone else that kind of power over you. It's a recipe for disaster. I've seen you post this a few Times Now.Just wanted to say my piece.

Yeah I know
It's not real
I'm meant to be alone
And I'm better off that way
But I can't do it anymore
Too bad Heaven isn't real either
And too bad Hell is

 

[LittleMagician]

Ypu obviously are feeling emotive and hurting, but please stop attacking everyone else for YOUR issues, we still get it, sad incel sad and angry.

Just stop with fucking attacking people ffs

Don't worry about them, they're like this to everyone on this site

Yeah I know
It's not real
I'm meant to be alone
And I'm better off that way
But I can't do it anymore
Too bad Heaven isn't real either
And too bad Hell is

Sadly heaven doesn't exist; and the only hell is on earth