Suicide is a very complex issue. Reducing it down to one word (like your aunt did) is oversimplifying the complexities of the issue. I would not say she is entirely wrong- there are definitely cases of suicide that appear to be quite selfish. For example, parents who commit suicide when their children are young and depend on them- I find that to be a pretty selfish act. But to reduce the entire topic of suicide into one word, as if it can ultimately give justice to every nuance involved, is very naive. Life is not black and white. Suicide is not black and white. Suffering is often multi-faceted. There is a reason very intelligent humans for hundreds of years have argued over the ethical dilemma of suicide- it's because it is not a simple and straightforward issue. Your aunt, unfortunately, does not realize how complicated suicide is, or else she wouldn't chalk it up to such a rudimentary view. Growing up, my parents treated depression the same way. Their perception of depression was insultingly elementary, and they thought it was as simple as flipping a light switch in my brain.
People just don't see our side of things. They don't allow themselves to have prospective on the issue because society is so against suicide. People think there's a solution to most problems and that things will look up. It's very black and white indeed. Not everyone's situation gets better and there isn't always a solution.
The world and laws of reality work a certain way. Ever notice how most good things are to good to actually happen and completely unrealistic?
Bad things just seem to be the norm for some people, but again it really depends on the circumstances. Most people in the U.S and U.K will be born of average intelligence in a household that makes about 50k a year. Theres a good chance they will have maybe one or two siblings. And about a 50% chance their parents will divorce and for most of them, that's the worst thing that will ever happen to them.
But for people born with serious issues, abusive parents or low income; a chain reaction of terrible things happen most of their life.
I'm retarded and get bullied and or fired at every job I take. My parents expect me to live on my own soon and Idk what to do, because it can take years to get disability. I also have mood issues and a metabolic condition called pcos. The discomfort can leave me bed ridden and the weight issues are unbearable. Oh BTW there's no fucking cure.
For my mood issues, I've been to countless abusive psych wards and have taken meds with awful side effects. In elementary school I was bullied by the nun and principal for drawing in class. I was told things would get better after my last suicide attempt, but I got abused and fired over and over at different jobs.
The only thing I'm capable of is art/design and there's no way to make a steady income off of that. Art only reminds me of trauma and how what I went through because of it was for nothing.
My circumstances are permanent and things would have gotten better if they were going to. I did think about my friends and the people I care about, and that's why I stayed for this long.
I spared their feelings for a long time. Besides most people outside my immediate friend group don't have time to talk anyways. And a large number of people would rather never talk to people like us again than listen to our "negativity".
So if most people want nothing to do with us anyway, then who's it really hurting to CTB? Thinking about it logically, when I do this, it will benefit me because it's just going to be over. Other people will be sad, but they'll get over it. There's more harm in living than dying.