Memories/short rant

[Kino_]

This definitely sounds stupid, and it's probably a normal process of getting older, but I can't seem to remember the past as much as I used to. I can hardly remember events, names, or people from even a year or two ago. I can't remember the good or the bad. I'm not exactly old either; I'm in college. It's not really a big deal to be honest, but it's a bit disappointing to forget. And it's disheartening to hear other people recall their childhood when I can't really do the same.

Then again, a reasonable explanation is that these people had a more impactful childhood than I did, leading to stronger memories. After all, my childhood just passed by like a blur. I just existed and lived day after day. Even now, the days are passing by and there's no substance to them. I'm just existing. I'm quite busy, but every now and then, I take a step back and think. What exactly am I working for? Why do I feel so empty? Why is my life so empty?

It's a struggle to get out of bed now. Again. I mean, what's the point? I want to disappear now. Again. I mean, would it really matter? I don't want to live these empty days, just to look back at them in the future and not have a single memory because of how pointless they were.

 

[restless.dreams]

No, it doesn't sound stupid! If you are depressed, it can sometimes lead to memory loss. I have a hard time remembering things too, and it can be really frustrating. Sadly I don't have a solution for you, but I just wanted to let you know you're not alone.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

I don't remember things from childhood other than the shitty things that happened.
I've never had a good memory anyway. I think many people have this problem.