Help Members of 1 year or so - is SaSu helping?

[Sulyya]

So anyone who joined around early 2022 approximately, since someone from about a year ago may remember their pre SaSu days more clearly and be in a similar life situation to that time. Posting this in Recovery as that is my aim personally. After a just a few days, I'm finding that I'm posting more already and certainly thinking in a more whole way about suicide, though not any closer to doing it myself (it hasn't inspired me to, or anything similar).

Has it affected how much you contemplate it compared to last year?
Has it helped your recovery?
Has being with this community led you to engage less or more with people irl?

 

[Avyn]

I've been here for a bit longer than a year, but I took a break inbetween so it should be around the year mark of me being actually active.

SS has nothing to do with how much I contemplate ctb, I would still be wishing for death every day even if I hadn't found this site.
It didn't help with the thoughts, but it made me feel more understood and valid, which helps in a different way.
Throughout my life I was called crazy, ill and disgusting for being the way I am. Knowing there's others that feel exactly like me made me stop hating myself.

I'm not particularly recovering or looking to recover. I always knew I will kill myself one day and not die a natural death.

I always isolated myself and even if I tried hard to engage with more people, it'd make me disassociate through the roof.
Everyone else is so much different than me. I do hang out with more college students compared to when I first joined, but it's not connected to SS.

 

[ThatStateOfMind]

So anyone who joined around early 2022 approximately, since someone from about a year ago may remember their pre SaSu days more clearly and be in a similar life situation to that time. Posting this in Recovery as that is my aim personally. After a just a few days, I'm finding that I'm posting more already and certainly thinking in a more whole way about suicide, though not any closer to doing it myself (it hasn't inspired me to, or anything similar).

Has it affected how much you contemplate it compared to last year?
Has it helped your recovery?
Has being with this community led you to engage less or more with people irl?

It hasn't affected my contemplation either way. It has helped some, it makes me feel less alone and more understood. And it hasn't made me engage less with people, I do however, talk less about my thoughts with friends but it upset them so that's why. Now I just talk here.

 

[Sulyya]

It was helpful for a time but now there's no longer any safety here because I get messages like this telling me that as disabled people we have no rights to our bodies and deserve to be caged and assaulted in institutions:

What thread is that? Couldn't find it with the search.

 

[chocolatebar]

Not really. In the end, my experience in this place is the same I had in every place I have been. I'm like an invisible being, who makes no difference is present or not. Feels the same as when a group walked along a narrower corridor, and I was the one left behind so they could keep walking side by side, not even remembering that I was there if I stopped wanking or if disappeared for several days

 

[looseye]

SaSu hasn't changed my decision to die by suicide but it has helped prolong my stay among the living several times. My go-to activity when feeling particularly shit is to silently browse the different subforums and see what people have to say. Since this is a place primarily for suicidal people, I can often find myself in the words of others, and that alone brings some peace of mind already. For me it's mostly a place to connnect and cope together, I guess

 

[Gloom]

I've been using SS more in the last 6 months or so and it hasn't helped me to recover, but I think that's because I never interact with the recovery section so I want to try and do that more. I would probably have a better time if I spoke to more people but I really struggle with that irl and online. it's desensitised every aspect of suicide to me so contemplation is more common.

 

[symphony]

I've been here almost exactly a year. In that time my suicidality has waned and waxed just the same as usual. The difference is that SS has empowered me to feel like I have at least somewhat of an option in whether to die or continue to live. As far as that relates to recovery, it means that when I decide to keep living, even if just for a short while, it is an active decision. I actively choose to live, because I could actively choose to die. Versus before SS, I felt (morseo) forced to live, and I "chose" to live because I felt I had no other option. Now, I feel pretty confident that if I attempted with my chosen method, I would succeed. So I have an option. And that is really freeing. Makes me feel less trapped.